Become a Fan
By Christopher Charles Roman
Thursday, March 20, 2003
Sometimes we don't know exactly who is doing the speaking...
I sit down on the small straw chair beside the balcony door. I briefly glance up to remind myself of the ground below the second floor balcony I sit on. My head drops back to its resting place, causing the smoke from my cigarette to plume out around my head like a dragon’s smoky breath.
“Shoot. I did it again.” Nodding my head like I was swinging a pendulum from it. It was Dana again. Every time I think of the smell of freshly cut grass and cigarette smoke, I think of Dana.
“Mind if I join you?” a haunting voice asked.
“Sure.” I barely tipped my head in the voice’s direction.
“Don’t worry, I brought my own chair.” I heard the sound of a hollow tapping on wood, closely followed by the creak of someone sitting down on plastic porch furniture.
“Nice evening.” The voice seemed to drift over the wind.
I shrugged as I hung my head and flicked ashes from my cigarette.
“Too bad Dana couldn’t be here to share it.” More wind in the silent night. “Well, I guess that’s what I get.” I reached my head up to gaze at the night sky. With each cloud that drifted by the near-full moon, I thought ‘how peaceful it is.’
“Would be more peaceful with Dana,” the voice responded, even though I did not vocalize my thought. Then again, what would be more peaceful about it? What does she have that you don’t?”
The sound of the tenor chuckle startled me. “Sometimes you have to look at the big picture. You see, you have a gift. Whatever you are looking for, you already have it.”
I knew the voice was right. I responded, “Focus. It’s all about focus, isn’t it? My lens needs polished.”
“Then polish it. The answer is in the wind, my friend.” A sudden gust accompanied by a hollow knocking sound on wood. The voice that gave the company I so much needed, whisked away.
I took another hit of my cigarette.
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