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Rodd Jokre

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New Age Ice Treats
By Rodd Jokre
Monday, December 22, 2003

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Thought up: 4.22.02 – 7:23pm
Written: 4.24.02 – 3:17pm

These days, everyone is really into the whole "New Age" diets. Not eating anything that is remotely tasty, but instead really into the health foods. So why not prey on these poor souls that don't enjoy a hearty ˝-pound of cow with 4 strips of dead pig. Now that's what I was raised on, and to this day, I still rate at the top of my list.

Now I don't care if they like to eat what they like to eat. Why not? I have no problems with that, but I just figure, why not take it a step further. Why not give them something to really rant and rave about. "New Age" diets are heavily laden with fruits and vegetables, and I personally, as I’m sure many people, don't care for veggies, so why don't we do find a way to cash in on it. I think it would be a splendid idea to take all the veggies that you don't eat, and just put them in a big box. It doesn't matter whether or not you refrigerate the box of "bad tasting stuff." It's ok, cause if it gets mold on it, well, you get it; it's a veggie too.

So anyway, just throw all that stuff in a box every time you can't eat it, and save them for however long you want, until the box is full I guess, and I'll start up a website like and you can all send me your veggies cause I just got this new food blender and I'd take them suckers, and whip them up into a creamy batch of yuck, and get some old corndog sticks, (don't tell the vegetarians, might still have hotdog on them) and stick some sugar in the "puree" so that they stick to the sticks, and freeze them delightful treats. We could make a killing on them. People love that crap nowadays. Well, some people I guess. Or maybe just cooked carrot on a stick, but frozen of course, cause nobody likes cooked carrots. I can just see the commercial for it...

...Ah yes, after a nice day of work at the nudist colony, I always like to come home, take a leisurely jog in the park with my dog, and come home to a nice, cold, tasty, puree of random-vegetables-and-possible-mold-from-a-cardboard-box on a corndog stick. Yum...

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Reviewed by C.J. Park 1/3/2004
Yum yum -- gimme two, one for each of my bosses! Thank Rodd, I really needed a good laugh.
Reviewed by Tinka Boukes 12/23/2003
O' shit this is!!!

I agree...veggies!!

You are a "DeLiGhTfUl ScReAm"!!!

Love Tinka

Reviewed by Bonita Quesinberry 12/22/2003
Now, I eat mostly live foods: which rules out any and all red meats, instead lots of raw veggies, fruits, nuts and grains; but then, I happen to have a wicked digestive system that can't process those heavy meats. But, I have to say, Rodd, I will pass on your New Age Ice treats. YU--UK! ~~Bonnie Q
Reviewed by Kate Clifford 12/22/2003
hmmmm think I will skip that treat :-) Fun write.

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