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Deborah Richards

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   Recent stories by Deborah Richards
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When love doesn’t love you (taken)
By Deborah Richards
Monday, June 05, 2006

Rated "PG" by the Author.

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loves enduring promise

When love doesn’t love you (taken)


As tears rain down his face he echoed the sentiments of the past remembering all that he did and whom he had loved, conquering nothing that could not escape his life, the strength an dreams he had seemed to disappear without thought, without cause, and on the days he felt lonely he reached for a book that seemed to wipe away the tears from his eye’s, love didn’t love me was all he said over and over again, repeating the whispering words, with rapture, casting aside all the belief that swallowed him whole.

Love didn’t love me was all he said, as he turned toward the ocean, watching as the waves roared against the sands, touching his feet moments at a time, thinking back to when, an all childhood and boyish memories filled his mind, as the ocean became a slide show of past and present, listening to the familiar times of life, an joy ran through him, as old folks love embraced him just for a second, I gave all was one thought, one saying, as more filled him and again he could no longer wipe away and hide away the tears that ran down his cheeks, spilling away what was left over, from his well being.

Mystery shadowed his conscious thought’s, and the man that stood with him he did not know, did not recognize, gray thinned temple roots, where were dark black curls once where, and eye’s that could only see know with glasses, his masculine frame was fragile, this was not him, life chased him, as he chased life, remembering how he had to grow up to soon, a man that was still a boy inside, he wrapped his arms around himself, a sudden chill caused him to shiver, distracting him from his thought’s, time was wondering away from him again, checking his watch he could see that a second became hours of him standing there, alone surrounded by darkness, with only moonlights ray’s his only constant light, like his life.

When love didn’t love me was all he said as he turned around and walked away. And memories of once displayed a picture album of what his life was know, as he turned the pages in his mind, his stride became more forceful, rushing back to embrace what was left of passion, a love that did not know him, that did not love him, lay dying in a hospital bed, love that spawn time was one breath from this earth, as he whispered my love did not love me.


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Reviewed by Robert Montesino 6/13/2006
This really touched me after reading,it is atomospheric & full of truth. A little gem among many stones. I noticed a few typos "where were dark black curls once where" third stanza second line should read "where dark black curls once were" & "wondering" third stanza sixth line should read "wandering" & "know" last stanza second line 'And memories of once displayed a picture album of what his life was know' should read 'And memories once displayed a picture album of what his life was now' This piece is too beautiful to leave without revision. A remarkable & memorable piece of work...thank you for sharing!




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