Makin' meatballs is easy. Or is it? Massimo finds out when his mother isn't home one Sunday to prepare them for him. Join Massimo as he has his first cooking experience and learn how to make Meatballs Brooklyn style!
I like what you've got here. You have tallent and it shows. The humor is well developed, the style's engaging. The writer's voice put me deep into the character's POV, all good things, but I din't feel as if the story was quite done. There seemed to be an element missing in the wrap-up. There was a good build-up with the mess in the kitchen--but no reaction from Mom. Massimo destroyed the kitchen, and got his meatballs, his pay-off. The humor died at that point. Maybe, you should have him volunteer to cook dinner for Mom, to reward her for a hard day grocery shopping. Mom could take one look at the kitchen and tell him he's done quite enough--but suggwest that that he could always do the dishes. Massimo then could impose on Carmine to handle that chore. Massimo could tell his friend, "Hey, I fixed the meatballs you were wolfing down. You should do something to help me out." This type ending would play off the fact that Carmine was instrumental in the project that Massimo takes credit for. Just a thought. Best of luck with this.
Reviewed by Melissa Gallinaro (Reader)
How you doin'?
Great story, thanks for the hunger pains!