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Gypsies Smile

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The Text Affair
By Gypsies Smile
Sunday, October 12, 2008

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A women scorned by her own life

She's looking for him to come to her emotional rescue, sitting here in the dark knowing that he is not far away but with another. Will he be her knight in shinning armor when she comes calling for him in the heat of the night, looking for that rescue as her body cries out for his touch. Texting to one another about their desires and needs that each of them fullfill for the other...hmmm what is it about him, his rusky mannerisms, the big body and the strong voice the way his hands grip her small body. So quiet, he comes to her with animal stealth...crouched to the ground waiting to pounce on this small innocent creature ready to devourer her whole. She being small, yet so large a beast within that she has trouble containing her composure and control. Thank heavens for the distractions and visitors that come and are able to hold back what could become deadly.

A mother by day, and something else by night...what she is, is unclear only that when she gets you in her sight you are dead, dead to the world and to the spirit. Like the widow spider you don't know until it is to late. A suadultrous...the suadultrous, if only there was some kind of warning, it doesn't matter if your married,in you, haven’t got a chance.

Raised up in a world of sex, drug and music of all kinds she has pick up traits and habits that are sometimes considered a world wonder. Long to find the one that will work her every angle none have come close. Still she walks the day and a stranger to the society of what lives around her and opens the door to the dark forces of the night that call her name and sings the lullaby that brings them to her door. Enjoyment is her payment...seduction is her game.

Wonting out of this bitter sweet life of intense romance and aggressive behavior, yet formed a habit, will it ever leave or will the pull always be there. So much she wants to settle down, to become the women of a mans dream and not just in bed or around the house but to be wanted for who she is becoming a “women” no longer the girl next door! Often wonder what her separated husband would think or even say to such a crazy life lived full of betrayal and mistrust a double only here of in books. This time its real and she is living it. Wanting to be set free from it to come out and speak the truth to be able to get the support and help...the fear is far to great to face. More so the fear of the one man who would do anything for her, even get down on the ground and change a toilet seat, would finally say, "no more" and be gone forever.

How she longs for the truth to be finally be rid of this dark double life that surrounds her so much that when she want no more of comes back twice as hard and she too is sucked in. How do you tell someone you have a double life any ways?

She brakes away from her spaced out thoughts and attends one of the kids who woke from a dream. Shaking her head, makes her way to them...who will attend her when she awakes from this dream like state that in fact is reality. Soothing her child as he falls back to sleep in her arms and she kisses his forehead, covers him up and walks back out into the dark existence of her living room that is also the reflection of her heart.

The familiar buzz of the phone…another text simulating the need for relief not wanting to really continue on with this kind of chatting wishing she could tell him that she is more than a body of skin and pleasure…in her head she screams “no more, hear my scream, I want this so much but its so wrong cant you be strong for both of us and just go away”. But again she texts back and the innuendo goes on.

She is in constant battle with good and evil, and until she can be truthful to herself the evil side, the dark side will go on until she beats it, until she can say “Enough”. The favor of God is what she wants!

Cohabitate is what her marriage was with her spouse, there wasn't much between them, the existence of their body’s passing but not much more. So she found herself dwelling toward those that would give her the treatment of the physical need and emotional desire that her body wanted and her mind went along, striving for a more in-depth relationship hoping that out of these fly by night affairs one of these men would find more interest then just her deformed body.

Time for a run get out this frustration that comes up more often, trying to find a new venture into the physical and emotion realm that has taken ownership of her body. As the body burns and sweats hard, the push and longer the stride hoping that this will take care of what normally the body would get from the touch of the male body engulfing hers. Maybe even exhaustion will take part and she could just drop into bed and forget about the affair for another night and hope that tomorrow will be different.

God has a plan and its not the one she thought of, it something so much more…this separation that she thought was for him, to teach him is looking more toward her and that she is the one that needs the most. He said that he is waiting for her to come to her senses and the crazy part is…he’s right!

Where will she go from here? Only, 'to be still and know that I am God' are the word that play daily in her mind. For so long, life has moved so fast, not taking the time to get to know herself, lost between the sheets. Buzz…one day this will stop, he may come to his righteous mind. May it not lead to the obsessive or craziness of the emotions that build over time.


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Reviewed by Regis Auffray 10/13/2008
I always rely on God. I sometimes wonder if God is listening. The world is in a mess. I appreciate your short story, Gitan. I wish I could have got to know you better. We could use your voice at the chorus (hint). I know you are very busy. I hope you are happy and well. Love and best wishes,


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