The best defense against adversity is a humorous offense. Our story of using humor to overcome adversity.

It’s been said that when life gives you lemons, you should make lemonade. I don’t know who originated that proverb, but I believe it still rings as true today as it did when it was first uttered. Adversity, after all, is as fundamental a part of life as breathing air. It inevitably happens to us all. Some are fortunate to experience adversity as a brief and gentle shower. Others, like me, seem destined to experience diversity as a deluge. Yep, for my family and me, when it rains, indeed it does pour.

I recently underwent a total hysterectomy to alleviate my immediate pain and symptoms and to eliminate any possibility of ovarian or uterine cancer so prevalent in my family history. Miraculously, my mother survived ovarian cancer. She beat the insurmountable odds only to later develop colon cancer. Thankfully, she has managed to defeat cancer a second time. I might not have been so fortunate. Thus, my doctor recommended a proactive course of action to minimize my risks. Mostly as a preventative measure and to address some minor problems I was experiencing, my doctor also did some repair work on my bladder and attached a sling designed to support the bladder and to prevent it from later falling or tilting, which is a common occurrence for women after childbirth or hysterectomy. During the surgery, my doctor realized that my bladder had fused to my cervix, which necessitated additional repair work on my bladder and required my prolonged use of a catheter to allow the bladder to heal. Unfortunately, the fusion of my bladder and cervix created for me a greater risk of developing a fistula, which is an unnatural connection between two organs. Of course, Murphy’s Law reigned supreme, and I did, indeed, develop a fistula that allows my bladder to empty into areas it should not. I am now facing an additional surgery and have become reacquainted with my old friend – the catheter.

My doctor, a truly kind and compassionate man, hugged me and with great personal emotion asked me how I felt about the diagnoses. My children will tell you what a sap I am given my highly sensitive disposition. Nevertheless, I surprised even myself by restraining tears and answered that at least I was not facing cancer or other life-threatening illnesses. As much as I did not want to face yet another surgery and the resulting pain and recovery, I took comfort in the fact that, at some later date, I would have my life back and be completely healed. I reminded myself that there are so many people who face each day without such comfort. I approached this appointment and newly confirmed diagnoses with a degree of humor and courage I never realized I had. Even my doctor and his skilled and thoughtful nurse laughed at my quips and seemed to derive much needed relief from the potentially disheartening situation. The nurse told me I should play the lottery, as both she and my doctor had only ever seen one other fistula case in their respective practices. I laughed at the irony. I now await an appointment with the specialists at the University of Colorado Hospital who will perform my surgery, as the procedure is quite complicated and requires expert precision for a successful result.

A few days later, I had to take our 15 year-old daughter in for blood tests to confirm a suspected diagnosis of Celiac disease. Celiac disease is simply defined as a digestive disorder that affects the body’s ability to absorb the protein gluten. It’s an autoimmune and genetic disorder that is incurable and cannot be mitigated with medicine. Serious, irreparable damage to the intestines can occur when left untreated. Unfortunately, the only treatment method is the complete removal of all glutens from the diet, which is far easier said than done. Gluten is the most common ingredient in all food products, second only to sugar. Celiac disease is actually very common and can go undetected and undiagnosed for years. In fact, the average length of time for diagnosis is 11 years. Celiac disease is often triggered by a traumatic event, such as an accident or illness like the flu. Our daughter had a nasty bought with either the flu or some other intestinal disorder just two days before my first surgery. Now, almost 7 weeks later, she still suffers from stomach cramps, diarrhea, and similar symptoms. So, we nervously await the blood test results from the Mayo Clinic. In the meantime, we must help our daughter to cope with her fear and uncertainty.

In May, my husband, an insulin dependent diabetic for more than 15 years, was diagnosed with a thyroid disorder. He must take rather expensive medication to alleviate his symptoms, which includes sharp pain in the joints of his hands. Thyroid disorders, like diabetes and celiac disease, are autoimmune disorders. Consequently, like his diabetes, he will likely need treatment for this disorder for the remainder of his life. Fortunately, my husband approaches his health issues with acceptance, careful management and a delightful sense of humor. He is frequently my inspiration when adversity strikes again. In fact, he has even managed to maintain his sense of humor in light of the uncertainty stemming from corporate restructuring and significant personnel changes in his place of employment.

Friedrich Nietzsche once said, “That which does not kill us makes us stronger.” I genuinely believe this is true . I also believe that we need not suffer alone. I derive considerable strength from my family and all the many blessings we have shared. Together, we have confronted and conquered fear, pain, uncertainty and adversity many times. This time is no different.

I share this message with my readers in an effort to offer support to all those who suffer. At times it can seem unbearable. However, when we know that we do not suffer alone, that other people both understand and share our pain, illness and loss, we often muster courage and hope from unexpected places. Above all, the best defense against adversity is a humorous offense. Laugh whenever possible.

When my doctor asked me if I was experiencing hot flashes yet, I immediately replied, “Who the hell can tell when it’s 102 degrees!” He laughed and said, “In that case, I think I’m having hot flashes.”

“If you can't make it better, you can laugh at it.” – Erma Bombeck 

© Kimberle Balsman