Listen up all you city slickers while I tell you a story about my special sidekick Turkey Hat Jack....how we met up and how he came about gittin' that fancy soundin' name of his.
Well it started like this. A few years back, me and my big red Ned was ridin' up in the hills along this rough dusty trail when we run up on this ole mean lookin' black and white turkey...looked like a giant tumbleweed.
His feathers was all poofed up big-like and he was hoppin' around squakin' and scratchin' the ground. It seemed to me that he was surely lookin' for a fight.
Well I tell ya I was real scared and ole Ned wasn't havin' nothin' to do with steppin' any closer to this dangerous lookin' critter. We knew we was in one bad purdicament...yes sir we sure enough knew that.
Bout that time Ned turned his head sharp around, gave a great big whinney and I caught sight of this here cowpoke ridin' up from the other side of the trail. He was sittin' tall in the saddle on what looked like a little spotted horse.
As soon as he heard all the commotion comin' from that big nasty tempered turkey, he spurred that little horse into a run...straight at us.
Ole Ned was dancin' around real nervous like. We was tryin' to back outta there...tryin' to find a way to git clear of that orney critter. But that little spotted horse just keppa comin'...fast and straight as an arrow.
Before I could say 'jumpin' cyote bones' ole Jack had done jumped off of that little spotted horse of his and tackled that big ole bird. He grabbed him by both legs and wrestled him to the ground.
That critter was yellin' so loud I bet you could of heard him back at the ranch and up to the heavens. It was for sure this turkey-bird weren't doin' no gobble gobblin'. No sir...he was flappin' his wings and squawkin' like he done lost his mama.
There was so much dust a flyin' couldn't tell who was who and what was what. They was rollin' and tumblin' every which way...it were about the biggest dad-burned scramble Ole Ned and me ever did see.
All of a sudden outta that big mess of floppin' about, up popped Jack. He had 3 long shiney black and white turkey feathers clenched all up tight in his fist. He was grinnin' like a big fat skunk-tailed possum after rollin' in the mud.
That big ole turkey was a howlin' louder than a cyote and he shot off like a hot air balloon flyin' right over the top of ever tree that got in his way.
Jack stood up...dusted off his britches, stomped his boots and plomped those 3 shiney feathers right in the band of that black Stetson hat of his. He hopped back on his little spotted horse, looked over at me and Ned and said "Howdy doo...my name's Jack".
Well the rest is not too hard to figure out. Word of me and Ned's rescue from that ole turkey-bird got around pretty quick like. Me and Ned call him our "hero"....everybody else calls him Turkey Hat Jack....yes sir...they sure do.