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Jeremy A Vaeni

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Member Since: Jan, 2002

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     Recent stories by Jeremy A Vaeni
· A True Tale Out Of New Orleans - 9/20/2005
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· Make Way For Crazy! - 12/7/2004
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· Though Ball - 5/5/2004
· Train Crazies and The Human Brain - 5/5/2004
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           >> View all 11


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Why Anne Coulter Attacked The 9/11 Widows
By Jeremy A Vaeni
Wednesday, June 21, 2006

Rated "PG13" by the Author.

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This is the story behind the story.

Oh, Anne Coulter said something cruel to sell a book? Yawn.

I'll bet the publicity campaign started like this:

PHONE: RING! RING! RING! (or in the event that it's a cell phone with personalized ringtone, "Annie are you okay? Are you okay? Are you okay, Annie? ... You've been hit by...You've been struck by...a smooth criminal")

ANNE: My time, your dime, what is it?

ROVE: Anne...it's me, Carl.

ANNE: Red rover, red rover, send Carly right over.

ROVE: God I hate when you do that.

ANNE: What is it now? You want me to anthrax Dan Rather? He's on his way out you know.

ROVE: No-no! Shut up and listen! You know that shitty book you've got coming out?

ANNE: Right. Hundreds of pages of inconsequential nonsense vomitted in the general direction of the dems. I know it well.

ROVE: Okay, good. Here's what we need: When you do the TV circuit, we need you to go out there and bash the 9/11 widows. Not all of them, just the ones who continue to make a stink about a coverup, blah-blah, accountability, yada-yada.

ANNE: How do I do that?

ROVE: Look, I don't care if you have to add a chapter to your fucking book, just do it! No one's gonna read it anyway, okay? You know that. People will buy it just to own it.

ANNE: True. My audience isn't really big on reading. But still...don't you think--

ROVE: I don't think and neither should you! Just do it! We're testing the waters here to see how far this thing can go. If we can plant in the collective the notion that the 9/11 widows are self-rightous bitches, we'll be one step closer to getting the public to not care about anything we do ever.

ANNE: That's perfect! Then when we steal the next 2 elections no one will make a peep--not even the radical, diabolical, malicious Left!

ROVE: One election.

ANNE: I'm sorry?

ROVE: There's only one election left. Long story. Look just do it. Slam them.Slam them HARD.

ANNE: Ooh, Carl, that kinda talk gets me hot.

ROVE: Anne, you know I don't swing that way.

PHONE: CLICK!


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Reviewed by Vagiqueen _ 7/29/2008
Dear Mr Jeremy A Vaeni,



Do u remember the yahoo-chat that we have had 4 years back. If not, click the following link:



http://www.authorsden.com/visit/viewShortStory.asp?AuthorID=6361&id=15010



I am back from the universe after more than 4 years. I cound not complete my promise of meeting u at 2.00 AM near the door of your bathroom. I was gone away from the galaxy and after 4 years I could make contact with you.



Till date U must gave got confidence about the existance of aliens by the stories of UFOs, Crop circles, Cow abductions etc.



Pl reply to conatct me and get real information about the life of aliens... as U are going to get this real information directly from the alien itself... thats me.. Vagiqueen!



Waiting for the reply.



Vagiqueen



Planet: Venus
Reviewed by Elizabeth Taylor 6/22/2006
I wouldn't doubt for a NY minute that something like this happened.
ROFL

Love it!

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