Become a Fan
Make Way For Crazy!
By Jeremy A Vaeni
Monday, December 06, 2004
Rated "PG13" by the Author.
I parked my profile inside of an ET chat room. This is what I unearthed.
When this girl with nude photos in her profile, calling herself "vagiqueen" Instant Messengered me, I thought she was an ad for a porn site. Then it grew clear she was pulling my leg, not something else. Then it grew clear she wasn't pulling my leg and she WAS the other thing I thought she was pulling originally: Yep, she was nuts.
Here for your viewing pleasure is the full text of our conversation. Consider this a case study in sanity. Keep in mind as you read this that I (jvaeni) am an alien abductee. This, then, is the difference between abductees and the delusional....
(NOTE: For those not familiar with chat room lingo, "asl" means "age/sex/location," and "lol" means "laughing out loud.")
vagiqueen: 19 f
vagiqueen: what do u do?
jvaeni: nice photo...I'm a writer
vagiqueen: what do u write?
jvaeni: I wrote a book...write for UFO Magazine...sometimes television (Nickelodeon promos/MTV--that crap/ lol)
jvaeni: and you
vagiqueen: i ask questions to the people...lol
vagiqueen: can i ask u one question?
vagiqueen: why the aliens dont land??
jvaeni: long story
vagiqueen: i m ready...to listen...lol
jvaeni: the essence of it--which sounds like New Age bullshit but is not--is that they live from the point of view of oneness and we live from the point of view of seperate self (the ego). So essentially they have woken up to godself and we haven't. So they are here poking and prodding us in abstract ways to wake us because that is god waking god's self up (hence, oneness.) The reason they don't just tell us this is that we can understand it logically, as I am explaining it to you, but that explanation does no good. That's the short answer
vagiqueen: ok....can u plz tell me how much do u bliv in the existance of the aliens?
jvaeni: I don't believe or disbelieve. I'm an abductee so I don't get that luxury.
vagiqueen: what is ur personal opinion about the existance of the aliens??
jvaeni: they exist
vagiqueen: can u tell... what is the thing that makes u to bliv in them?
jvaeni: I just said, I'm an abductee. I don't believe in them, I know they exist. I've interacted with them, as crazy as that sounds.
vagiqueen: i mean....
jvaeni: you've heard of alien abduction before?
vagiqueen: what is that?
jvaeni: it's when aliens take humans and either do scientific-type tests on them or tell them something. It sounds ludicrous, but it happens.
jvaeni: aliens having a chat. lol
jvaeni: so how does one become the vagiqueen?
vagiqueen: u will come to know later...
vagiqueen: i wanted to ask
vagiqueen: can u tell... what is the thing that makes u to bliv in the existance of them??
jvaeni: I have seen them, interracted with them.
jvaeni: it's not a matter of belief
vagiqueen: ohhhh.... r u ___
vagiqueen: where did u meet them?
jvaeni: I didn't meet them the way you normally meet someone. They've been abducting me my whole life. Since I was a baby.
jvaeni: I think probably some other family members too.
vagiqueen: u said they have abducted u .... means exactly what happened and what happenes?
vagiqueen: ok...can u tell they r from which planet?
jvaeni: I don't know what planet they are from (or dimension, if that's the case.) Most times with abductions, we don't remember a lot and have to retrieve memories through hypnosis. It's very traumatic. But I have bits of memory here and there.
vagiqueen: what is the best experience of you with them?
jvaeni: Hmmm...the most vivid happened in October 2001...They came and took me from my bed. I was in this large nondescript room, standing up. I saw a row of tables with humans on them. The beings were sort of gathered around this nude blond woman on a table. I thought, 'Why am I seeing this?' and a female voice answered in my head, "Because you've always wanted to remember an abduction."
vagiqueen: so u must be remembering the messege that i sent to on 14/09/2002...
vagiqueen: "Beware the bearers of FALSE gifts & their BROKEN PROMISES. Much PAIN but still time. There is GOOD out there. We OPpose DECEPTION. Conduit CLOSING"
vagiqueen: do u remember... this was the messege
vagiqueen: this was sent by me to you and for you
jvaeni: I read that book too
vagiqueen: really it took 2-3 days for me to design this messege through crop circle
jvaeni: oh right...okay I was thinking of something else...you're talking about the crop circle with the large alien and the "coded" disk. [note to reader: don't ask]
jvaeni: so that was you, huh? the vagiqueen?
vagiqueen: u caught me...naa naa.... i caught u ...lol
vagiqueen: but unfortunately nobody replied me for this messege.....including u...!!
jvaeni: I'm the abductee--I'm supposed to be the weird one
jvaeni: what do you think that code meant? (if it's real)
vagiqueen: in 1941 3 UFO's came to earth from my planet, and unfortunaltly they crashed and 13 paranormal bodies falled down. they died only 3 were live... and they were kept under government security. The doctors hurt them a lot ... and those 3 live aliens also died. In that relation it was my duty to messege u people of earth to give an idea of our pain.
jvaeni: looks like you fucked that one up. Did you get fired?
vagiqueen: what is this nonsence?
jvaeni: that's what I'm wondering! Look! We have so much in common!
jvaeni: I'm not gullible...but thanks for playing
vagiqueen: so u r still thinking that i am some cybercrazy kid and playing on internet with the people like u?
vagiqueen: now i think it is hign time to give my REALLY REAL introduction
vagiqueen: i m an alien
vagiqueen: that is all
vagiqueen: i think ... rthat is not all for u ...
vagiqueen: u r talking about your abduction by aliens.... which was a nice story to listen by some kid
vagiqueen: but real think is that we are aliens...
vagiqueen: from venus
vagiqueen: some of us have come on earth few 10's years back on earth for SOME purpose...
jvaeni: what purpose?
vagiqueen: we are 100000 years ahead of earth people in generation..
vagiqueen: we are not gods...nobody is god in this universe
vagiqueen: every phenomenon has got scientific justification in this universe
jvaeni: so what is your purpose?
vagiqueen: whatever i am now ...and whatever u r seeing me in the profile picture is real picture of my body,but from inside i m an alien.
vagiqueen: and like wise so amny aliens are STAYING on the earth
vagiqueen: we can do what we can imagine... this is the level of our culture
jvaeni: so what's the reason?
vagiqueen: first it is high time for me to make u bliv in me..
jvaeni: I'm ready
vagiqueen: u must be thinking ... how venus aliens must be looking like..
vagiqueen: i said ... we are not god ... we are just 100000 years ahead of u
vagiqueen: we are just 100000 years advanced humans.... blivme
vagiqueen: do u know how humans developed?
jvaeni: let's hear it
vagiqueen: first they were like monkey with hair on the body...
vagiqueen: then human developed himself to remove unwanted part of his bodylike hair and tail....
vagiqueen: and he achived usful part for the body like brain..
vagiqueen: u people are having hair on haed and around sex...
vagiqueen: but i ask do u really need it?
vagiqueen: coz afer 100000 years u will aslo loose it
vagiqueen: u will use more of ur eyes to grasp the things... so your eyes will get larger...
vagiqueen: also the most important thing, the brain... u will use it to maximum extent... so brain and head size will increase
vagiqueen: so overall... u be bald and hairless, extrafair, with large black eyes and very big brain and head after 100000 years
vagiqueen: and exctly we are looking like THIS at this time.
vagiqueen: coz we are simply 100000 years ahead of u
vagiqueen: is that clear?
jvaeni: clear enough
jvaeni: you still didn't say what you're doing on earth
vagiqueen: i cant tell now , but you will come to know some time
jvaeni: 'where do you live now?
jvaeni: Of course. lol
vagiqueen: we are trying to interact with earth people through crop circles today also....
vagiqueen: this is happening from last few 100'syears
jvaeni: i'm in manhattan.
vagiqueen: u wanna meet me?
jvaeni: of course
vagiqueen: now it is obvious that u must be thinking that i am any talented prostitute..but
vagiqueen: i am not... and to remove this though form ur mind
vagiqueen: i will meet u in the night at 2.00 o'clock in your house
jvaeni: (which I wasn't thinking by the way)
vagiqueen: i will be waiting for u at the door of your bathroom.... wakeup, come and see me
jvaeni: I'll be sure to do that
jvaeni: actually there's a manequin there so...don't get scared
vagiqueen: of course... please dont forget to lock your door from inside
jvaeni: it's not mine by the way
jvaeni: I never do
jvaeni: you need my address or are you good?
vagiqueen: otherwise any real earth chick will come inside your house through door telling her name as vagiqueen....so lock the door carefully and wakeup at 2.00 o clock to see me alone waiting at the door of your bathroom
vagiqueen: i dont need your address
jvaeni: Yeah I'll be looking forward to it.
jvaeni: Be sure to dress casual
vagiqueen: 100sof years we are just wating to fulfil your purpose on earth... i dont know when that day will come.
vagiqueen: do u have cam?
jvaeni: I hope soon. I don't wanna have to do another Atkins Diet.
jvaeni: I do have a cam but not where I am now. Do you?
jvaeni: aliens don't use cams?
vagiqueen: no answer
jvaeni: so what do your parents make of you?
vagiqueen: next month on 13 Jan, 2005 a next crop circle will be formed in Hempshire village, England.
jvaeni: what will it be of?
jvaeni: and you don't want to talk about your parents?
vagiqueen: awareness for doing UNALLOWED acts by earth humans... the act was done hy you in 1963 feb
jvaeni: what act is that?
vagiqueen: ensaa from venus containg 2 alines were sent to earth for SOME purpose, and pilots from america force tried to catch that ensaa..
vagiqueen: that plane with 2 pilots were destryoyed by us...and nobody knows what happened to that plane..
vagiqueen: after 2 weeks, 5 planes from airport were flying through the cloud... and at the another end only 2 planes came out
jvaeni: why won't you talk about your parents???
vagiqueen: we are not having parent system like earth
vagiqueen: every alien is just an experiment of genetic science
jvaeni: What do you do for a living???
vagiqueen: ensaa means an energised fireball contaning living souls of aleins
vagiqueen: i cant tell much about myself
vagiqueen: i will say
vagiqueen: burmuda traingle is the best place for human being to get rid of his sins and to get releif formthe curse of us
vagiqueen: question is an alien and answer is and alien, reason is an alien and soltion is the alien...lol
vagiqueen: its time to quit for me
jvaeni: yeah you've been INSANELY typing away, huh?
vagiqueen: i told u i am not god and i an standing as an earth human at this time even though i am an alien
vagiqueen: i wnated to know the PURPOSE of coming on earth?
jvaeni: yeah what's the purpose???
vagiqueen: earth human is not worthy of living on earth
jvaeni: Well said. Whelp, vagiqueen, you've sure made me a believer. I hope to see you tonight. If not...I'll just cry myself to sleep like usual.
vagiqueen: i am not saying that we aliens are interested in living on earth.
vagiqueen: i know u are worry of the things happeing on earth like crop circles, ufos and burmuda traingle...
vagiqueen: this all will stop
jvaeni: what about the voices in my head?
vagiqueen: the time will come very soon
jvaeni: 2012 perhaps?
vagiqueen: no very soon...
vagiqueen: " NO EYES WILL SEE BALCK LIGHT"
vagiqueen: CONDUIT CLOSING
jvaeni: you mean black light?
jvaeni: for a superior being ya sure do misspell a lot of words.
jvaeni: so 2005 it's SEACREST...OUT!!!
vagiqueen: STILL PAIN...
jvaeni: vagi pain?
vagiqueen: GOOD IS BETTER THAN BAD
jvaeni: ya don't say?
vagiqueen: FOR BLACK LIGHT
jvaeni: will you come cuddle with me tonight? Hold me and tell me everything will be okay?
vagiqueen: 2.00'o clock tonight, at the door of your bathroom, waiting for you.......dont forget to lock your door
vagiqueen: first look of black light
jvaeni: what is the black light? The sun behind the sun?
vagiqueen: do u know sun is in the search of shadow from its born
jvaeni: what does that mean?
vagiqueen: u will be quite lucky to see the black light
jvaeni: Do you live alone in Manhattan?
vagiqueen: leaving all behind very soon...i have to
jvaeni: do you hold a job?
vagiqueen: biggest gift for earth ... black light
jvaeni: do you hold a job???
vagiqueen: coz 100000 years is not a short period (for u !)
jvaeni: DO U HOLD A JOB
vagiqueen: only job is give you black light
jvaeni: What do you do for money?
jvaeni: Manhattan isn't cheap
jvaeni: Although I suppose the mental ward is free
vagiqueen: 2.00'o clock tonight, at the door of your bathroom, waiting for you.......dont forget to lock your door
jvaeni: I'll bring popcorn
jvaeni: and Reese's Pieces
On a personal note I find it interesting how her spelling gets worse the more she types, the more she let's loose. It's like she couldn't "hold it together" for too long before unravelling. Unless the reason is because she really is an alien posing as a human, which I'll find out tonight. If that turns out to be true I'll get back to ya. And then I'll eat my hat.
Crap, I forgot to set my alarm for 2: 00 am. But I did wake up to pee at 2:30. I must have been too late. Either that or the vagiqueen was a no-show. No. I'll bet it was me. She did leave explicit instructions. Oh!--but I did remember to lock my door from the inside so no other women named "vagiqueen" would break in.
Oh well. At least I don't have to eat my hat. (Which, saddly, doesn't mean I don't want to...This diet is kickin' my ass!)
Site: Jeremy Vaeni's Valiens
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|Reviewed by Vagiqueen _
Its me ..Vagiqueen ... back again after 4 years. Till date U must gave got confidence about the existance of aliens by the stories of UFOs, Crop circles, Cow abductions etc. Pl send me mail on firstname.lastname@example.org
Waiting for the reply.
Vagiqueen / Planet-Venus
|Reviewed by m j hollingshead
|enjoyed the read|
|Reviewed by Judy Lloyd
|Are you sure you will manage to get back to us. Geez I think that is what happened over at my neighbor's house one night. We do have various size nets down here. Let me know if you need to borrow one. Oh yeah it is crazy all right and I thought I got the weird stuff.|
|Reviewed by April Smith
|Well, did she show up???? LOL Just teasing. That is ONE "interesting" conversation! :-) April|
Jeremy A Vaeni