Become a Fan
Discovering the Joy Within Chapter 2
By Caramel Vixen
Wednesday, July 11, 2007
Rated "PG13" by the Author.
This is based on my own life as a young woman.
Only the names have been changed.
At home, Jordyn lay in bed. She was wide awake because her eyes simply wouldn't close and allow her to give into darkness. Jordyn knew that closing her eyes meant facing the monster that she had once loved. In her dreams, she would see Carlos. Then she would have to relive that day over again. The day that changed her life forever.
Jordyn had learned that not even being pregnant would save her from the abuse of Carlos. She walked on eggshells around him because the last thing she needed was to upset him and have him put his hands on her. As her belly grew bigger it was harder and harder to protect her babies while trying to avoid his harsh and violent blows.
She never knew just what she was saying or doing to set him off. Sometimes he would just look at her and get angry. it's as if he hated or even despised her. he always saw fault in her. But after every beating came more apologies; more claims of love; and too many unkept promises of 'it won't ever happen again.'
Jordyn hid her bruises from the world. There was make up to cover black eyes. A bit of rouge would disguise bruised cheeks from his hard slaps. Her clothing covered the bruises left by hard fists and painful kicks to her stomach, back, or just wherever the blows landed. She rarely wore short sleeves or shorts. She always had bruises to cover because her friends and family couldn't know that she was being abused. jordyn didn't want to be judged and she wanted no one judging Carlos.
He loved her. At least he said that he loved her. he just didn't know how to control his anger. And she was always doing something to provoke him. Wasn't she? Well, she didn't know just what it was but she shouldn't have been doing it. A seventeen year old girl should just be happy that a twenty year old man would even look at her twice. Especially a seventeen year old girl who was already wearing a size sixteen.
Yep she considered herself lucky to have him. But she didn't realize just how far from true that was until that day. The day she that she couldn't keep him away from her stomach. The day that she, as a mother, was unable to protect her unborn babies.
Carlos picked jordyn up from school that day just as he had done every day since they had been dating. She was talking with a group of friends when he pulled up. Trying not to anger him, she said good bye to her friends and hurried to the older model Buick.
"hey, Baby!" she greeted him while closing the heavy door.
"Don't you 'hey, Baby' me?" She didn't know what she had done wrong but she could tell that he was pissed. his eyes were fire red. he was probably high on marijuana. he often times was. "How many times i got to tell you not to be round no other men? how am i suppose to know them my babies you carrying if you always got other men up in your face?"
Carlos was always accusing her of cheating with some man. jordyn wasn't surprised. It used to flatter her. But that was before she realized his accusations stemmed from his own infidelities. She had never been unfaithful. it was him who was always getting caught up with some hoochie. then, as if she was wrong for finding out, he'd beat her.
"Carlos, we were just talking about homework." She tried to explain. jordyn wasn't interested in either of the boys in her group of friends. She had known them both since kindergarten. All they were and ever would be is friends.
Carlos didn't respond. he was mad as hell and she was going to be punished as soon as he got her home. his mom was at work and they had the house to themselves. she was going to stop disrespecting him. he knew jordyn was messing around. she had to be. there was no way the twins could be his.
jordyn was nervous as they rode in silence. they past the turn off for her house so she knew he would be taking her to his place. his mother was at work. there would be no one there to protect her from his violence. she wanted to jump out of the car and run but how could she jump out of a car moving fifty miles per hour in her condition?
The beating started as soon as they walked into the small house. he closed the front door by slapping her body into it.
"Carlos, no!" She screamed as she wrapped her arms around her stomach protectively.
Carlos responded with more slaps. The blows grew more and more intense. She soon fell into a heap on the floor. jordyn pulled her knees to her stomach and lay in the fetal position. Her back caught most of his punches and kicks.
"Whose babies are they?" He screamed over and over like a mad man. Each time he asked the question he stomped her in her back.
"Stop! Carlos, please stop!" She cried. "These are our babies. Please don't hurt out babies."
Carlos snatched her up from the floor by her hair. He again slapped her into the door. Before she could move or even wrap her arms around her stomach, he kicked her hard in her abdomen. The pain that shot through her body was excrutiating. An ear piercing scream came deep from within her throat. Jordyn felt as if she was bleeding inside. When she looked down her khaki pants were wet. A mixture of water and blood was running down her legs.
The monster just watched her. he finally realized what he had done. That's when all the lies of 'I love you', 'I'm sorry', and 'it won't happen again' came. But this time it was too late.
"Get me to the hospital!" Jordyn screamed. She was only six months pregnant.
Carlos carried her to the car. he turned on the flasher and drove at top speed to the hospital. jordyn was in pain but she rubbed her belly and talked to her babies.
"It's going to be okay. i promise." She kept telling her girls.
But everything wasn't okay. Within the hour her baby girls were born. She couldn't have been happier. (Describe how they looked here)
But they were quickly rushed away. The doctor said that their lungs were not fully developed and they couldn't breathe on their own. they also had other complications, no doubt, as a result of my beating. he wasn't sure if there was anything they could do to save my girls.
"I need a moment alone with jordyn.' Dr. ford said to carlos. Carlos simply nodded, offered me a smile, and left the room.
As soon as the door closed, Dr. Ford asked, "Who is responsible for your bruises?"
I didn't know what to say. The Carlos i loved was back. I didn't want him arrested.
"jordyn, whoever beat you is responsible for you going into labor. whoever did this to you is the reason your babies are fighting for their lives right now."
That person was Carlos, the father of her babies. She wanted to protect him but at what cost? He didn't mean more to her than her babies. Jordyn couldn't let him think that simply saying 'I'm sorry' was going to make things okay. Her babies were having to fight for every breath they took because of him.
She pointed towards the door. "It was my boyfriend. But, please, tell me my babies will make it. Do whatever you have to do!" She pleaded.
Dr. Ford took her hand in his. "We'll do our best but it's in God's hands." At the door he turned around and gave her a hopeful smile. "And I'll take care of the young man."
Jordyn's parents arrived shortly after. They were confused. They told her that Carlos had called them and when they got there the police were taking him away in handcuffs.
"What's going on, princess?" her father asked.
She didn't want to but it was time for Jordyn to tell her parents about the silent hell she had lived in for the past year. They couldn't believe their ears when she told them of all the pain Carlos had inflicted on her. David wanted to kill him. Lorraine held her daughter closely.
moments later, Dr. Ford and a nurse returned with her babies. Both looked gloomy. Tears were in their eyes and tears sprang from jordyn's eyes.
"We've tried but there's nothing we can do." Dr. Ford was almost in tears. "We want you to spend this time with them."
The nurse handed Jordyn both baby girls. The doctor and his nurse left the room. jordyn, david, and lorraine watched the little girls as they struggled for every breath. as much as they were suffering, Jordyn could have sworn she saw smiles on their faces when it was over. They seemed to have slipped away at the exact same time. With the end of their lives, a big part of jordyn's life ended as well.
She heard her parents praying silently but she didn't join them. she had prayed. She had prayed and asked God to perform a miracle. But there was no miracle. God didn't seem to care about her prayer. Instead he took away her babies.
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|Reviewed by Mary Coe
|A very sad story. Maybe God did hear Jordyn's prayer and cared. Maybe he took babies because He wanted to protect them from any more harm from Carlos in case he got out of prison and tried to harm them even more. God always has his own plans. I'm glad that Jordyn finally got enough courage to have Carlos arrested. That is just what he deserved after what he put Jordyn and the babies through. A very good write.|