This is a piece out of my autobiography that I am working on. It goes back to a very turbulent time in my life when I did not know what to do or where to turn. I really wasn't even sure if I wanted to live or die. I was leaning towards death.

I gathered myself and continued to step up onto the sidewalk in front of the police station. As I was passing by some bushes a baby bird, (no lie) shot out from a bush and into the bottom of my pant leg that was dragging on the ground. I kid you not, now I’m hopping around in my tall shoes from foot to foot in my Live Fast-Die Pretty T-shirt, hair a mess. I didn’t want to get my scent on it because I was afraid then it’s mother wouldn’t take care of it. But it was too late now it was hiding in my pant leg cuddled up in there. At this point I remember very clearly looking up at the sky, raising arms up and saying “Why?” I just didn’t understand, what was I supposed to do now? With the mess that I was in at the present moment I could not possibly leave this baby bird that was obviously still much too young to even fly, to fend for it’s itself. I couldn’t have that weighing on my conscious, to just leave it on the sidewalk would be like leaving it for certain death. I reached down and kinda laid my hand flat to the ground I was gonna try to scoot him into my hand but I didn’t have to… he did it on his own. I smiled, then through tears and snot I started to laugh although I still had no idea what I was going to do with him. So we started walking, I started telling him about the trouble I was in and he seemed content to listen. I beared my soul to this baby bird we had a really long walk to the nearest phone and I know it seems silly but who better to tell. Regular people can be so judgmental, you can never tell if a shrink has ulterior motives- like seeking money. We walked about a mile, I wanted to see that he got some kind of help. I came across a church, someone here could help they could take him where he needed to go, churches can’t turn you away no matter what, right? If I had to I would explain the trouble I was in concerning my life and how I came across him. Yeah, that’s what I would do. We made the long trek up the driveway to this church on the hill, for the first time in my life I thought maybe I would not only get help for my little friend but maybe I would talk to someone here. In a church. Me, talk to someone in a church. The two just didn’t go together period. But I was going to give it a try I was in that much turmoil about my life. But nobody was home. Ha, imagine that, I actually took the steps up to the door of a church for guidance and knocked… and nobody was home! When I say that is just my luck, I mean that is just my luck. I couldn’t believe it, I was stunned I had stopped crying but started to tear up again and I looked at the little guy and I knew I would have to think of another way to help him on my own.

In total from the police station to the pay phone it was probably about a mile and a half. When we finally got there instead of calling my mom I called Beth and my Uncle Ed because I wanted her to come get me. I was afraid to deal with my ma I knew exactly what was coming. I talked to Uncle Ed for a few minutes then he put Beth on, she asked me where I was then told me to call her back. When I did she said mom was on her way. I tried to prepare myself mentally, I was still crying when she pulled up. My bird and me got in the car and of course she wanted to know what was up with that I told her how he shot out of the bush and into my pant leg and could we please take him to the veterinary clinic before I got crucified. If we just got him taken care then I’d be ready for whatever punishment was coming my way. The workers at the clinic looked at me like I had two heads when I walked in all a mess with my boy but they informed me that he was just a fledgling and he surely would have died fending for himself out of his mother’s nest. I called the next day and was told that he was doing fine.