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Gliding With Hawks
By Victoria Valentine
Sunday, August 24, 2003
Meditation can bring more than Relaxation...
Souls In Flight
Adrift in a
As birds take
Soars in their
Choke and stifle
The birds have
A soul flees
Soul in flight
Gliding with Hawks… A Bad Trip
“Close your eyes,” his gentle voice flowed through the speakers.
Classical music was the reposing background of the CD.
“Imagine yourself in a garden-- smell the sweet fragrance of flowers that surround you.”
She had a difficult time relaxing and concentrating on his words, for her mind wandered from yesterday to today and what might happen tomorrow. So she forced herself to remain in her bedroom chair, padded and comfortable, feet upon a green tweed hassock. She counted each breath, slowing her heartbeat and her thoughts. Flexing and releasing muscles from her toes to her head, she continued to listen, his mellow voice persuasive, seeping into her head, her subconscious…
“There is a bridge,” he annunciated with perfection “A child is waiting on the other side. The child is you…” his words were kind. She saw the bridge in the distance, and an irresistible urge to cross washed over her, for she was suddenly relaxing without the realization that she was sinking into deep meditation…
“Cross the bridge where the child is waiting. Embrace the child. Comfort the child, bring peace and comfort to your inner self….”
As she crossed the bridge, she entered into another realm. A place where there was no yesterday, today or tomorrow. She was -- that was her sole awareness. She was a being. She was floating. She was free.
Just before the CD ended, the soft voice prompted it was time to awaken, to feel refreshed and loved-- but she did not hear. And although her body remained in the position in which she had left it, she was far away from her room, her chair, herself. She had breached another plane of existence where there was no solidity. Gauze cascaded and although she reached out to break through the haze, her slender hands and arms did not tangle in the mesh cocoon. Encased in a colorless bubble, she was light and without feeling. All was timeless. She became confused for the child she had reached out to had drifted from her view; the bridge disappeared, as did the voice that had led her to this void. She was now alone, and thoughts of reality were returning, yet she was not in touch with the world around her; the world she was no longer a part of.
There was no bedroom, no home for that matter, for she was suspended high above trees. It was night. There was no moon. Darkness engulfed her. She inhaled deeply the odor of midnight dampness, such as after rain. She found herself to be moving rapidly above elms and evergreens, over what appeared to be a highway, yet it was so dark, she relied solely upon senses as she allowed free reign to this new being she had become. A sudden crash beneath her penetrated her sluggish mind. Below, two cars had collided upon the dark, rain-slick road. She heard it. Sensed it. She wanted to phone for help! Yet all she could do was hover above.
The next moment she passed beyond that stage of being and was speeding in no particular direction, further into extended darkness. Fear began to replace the calm that had brought her to this place. Realization told her she was no longer one with her body; she was simply a spirit caught between two worlds.
The sun shone brightly upon the city. Morning brought the sounds of traffic, and breakfast aromas from cafés and curbside snack wagons. The streets were filling with business people hurrying to their jobs.
Inside the crowded deli, a line formed. As she walked through the door, she noticed a young woman leaning on the counter, away from the others, filling out a lotto ticket.
Winning numbers passed through her brain, in exact sequence!
“No,” she said to the girl and nudged her arm. “Don’t fill in the 8 box! 7, the number is 7, and you will win!” Yet the girl ignored her. Annoyed, she walked away. She was psychic! Why wouldn’t people believe her… When she told them something was going to happen--- it would!
Now this girl had blown her chance at 3 million dollars! Well then, she decided, I’ll choose the lucky numbers. Snatching a blank lotto form from a stand atop the counter, she marked the appropriate boxes, went to the end of the line to wait her turn to register her numbers.
“Next,” the clerk called out.
“Coffee-- black, and a buttered roll,” a deep voice blurted from behind her.
“Excuse me,” she interrupted, “I’m next…”
“That all?” asked the clerk.
“Two thirty five,”
“Next,” the clerk repeated
“Here, I’m next…” she handed him the ticket.
“Tea please,” a woman’s voice called out, “lemon, no sugar or milk.”
“Now wait a minute here… She was becoming very annoyed. “Am I invisible?” she shouted to the clerk. Ignoring her, he handed the steaming cup to the woman.
“Next,” he called.
Indignantly, she left the store, vowing to never patronize that establishment again.
By nine in the morning, the city corners held crowds of people waiting for ‘walk’ signs. Sidewalks were cluttered with shoes, all kinds of shoes, mens, womens, childrens… When the signal flashed green, the shoes would trample the streets like herds of cattle.
An old man stepped from the curb as a rapidly moving bus neared the corner stop. She knew he was in its path! Lurching through the crowd, she lunged for the man, as if to use her body as a battering ram, to push him from the huge wheels that were heading straight toward both of them. She was there! She pushed him to safety, yet heard the screech of brakes, and screams of panic following! And next thing she knew the man was laying on the side of the road, blood everywhere.
Sirens blasted through the chaos as police cars and ambulances arrived on the scene. Most of the people who had been standing there had abandoned them, but a handful of witnesses remained to give details to the officers. She stood there waiting to greet the first cop to arrive.
“I saw the whole thing!” she began breathlessly. “He didn’t seem to see the bus. I tried to push him out of the way.. I tried…” her words were lost in the policeman’s conversation with a man who began telling his account of the horrid accident.
She turned to the man and told him she had tried to save the old fellow. “Didn’t you see me?” she asked. But the only reply was the whine of the ambulance as it took the old man’s body away.
“Something’s wrong,” she said aloud and turned to a woman standing beside her. “Why doesn’t anyone answer me? What--- am I transparent?”
The sun shone brightly. A hawk soared high in the noon sky. She felt a rush of wind as it glided past her. Below was a forest of pine she had never before seen. She fought for control. She was neither here nor there… yet she was everywhere! She was the world, she was nature, she was every sound in the city, every breath needed for survival of every living creature. Was she God? she wondered. Why couldn’t she see the body that had been hers? Where was she? Who was she?
“I’m home,” he called. It had been a long day at work. He was tired and hungry, and wondered what she had prepared for his dinner. “Anybody home?” an eerie silence filled the kitchen. No sign of breakfast, lunch or dinner… The kitchen was the same as he had left it that morning, coffee mug in a shining white porcelain sink, and everything in its proper place. Where is she? He wondered going from room to room, calling out her name.
The sun was ready to set. Her car was in the garage. Her purse was in its usual place in the den. Checking their bedroom he found her, sitting in her bedside chair, eyes closed in a deep sleep. “Honey.. I’m home,” concerned he rushed to her side, gently touching her shoulder. “Honey! Wake up!”
“Honey!” he cried frantically. Feeling a slow pulse in her throat, he continued calling out her name, although an unusual pallor had replaced her rosy complexion.
“Open your eyes! Wake up!” it was then he saw the portable CD player, and empty relaxation therapy case.
The Certificate read: Cause of death natural/exact reason unknown.
She merely ceased to exist.
At the funeral, the entire family stood in shock as the Minister eulogized her. One by one they placed a red rose on her casket. Following the graveside service, they released a dozen white doves. Wings flapping they flew crisply into the sky.
The sun shone brightly over green pastures as a hawk soared through the clear air. She felt the wind brush past her as she crossed its wake.
“Ashes to ashes, dust to dust” the Minister recited. Hearing his words the knowledge that she would not be alone consoled her. She flew with the doves, knowing he would follow soon……
He clicked the on button, heard the music and the persuasive voice began:
“Close your eyes,” his gentle words flowed through the speakers.
Classical music was the reposing background of the CD.
“Imagine yourself in a garden-- smell the sweet fragrance of flowers that surround you...”
Site: Skyline Magazine
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