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Richard A Kirsch

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Ever Wonder about ... Your Bookshelf
By Richard A Kirsch
Sunday, January 25, 2009

Rated "G" by the Author.

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Listen in to conversations of the books on your bookshelf. Spend a few minutes and imagine what your bookshelf chats would be like. What would they have to say about you?

 “Psst!  Whatcha’ doin’?”  Dirk Pit (of Clive Cussler fame) whispered up to HB.  “HB” the Holy Bible – Jerusalem Bible Edition was regally surveying the room and the other works on the bookshelf.

“Nothing much.  Just standing here being judgmental,” came HB’s response.

It was after the “bewitching hour” and the books were carrying on their nightly conversations.  (Ok, so “bewitching hour” is trite but that’s what popped into my head.)

“Well you can afford that.  The rest of us aren’t quite as righteous,” was Pit’s comment.  The banter went on for a bit.  Then the Photo Album (PA) spoke up.  What do think of the human members of our family?

“They haven’t gone to church in a while,” HB stated just a bit judgmentally.

“So what?” piped up Dirk and continued, “they’re good people.”

“HB is all about following rules,” came a new voice in the crowd.  It was coming from the “His Dark Materials” trilogy.

“Your fiction.  What do you know?” asked HB.

“Pretty much of you is fiction as well,” chimed in Einstein’s biography.

“Lets change the subject,” this peace filled suggestion came from The Audacity of Hope.

“Ok.  Sure.  Why not,” came an almost unanimous agreement from the other shelves.

“Personally, I think they’re up to something,” a new voice joined the rest.  From the sound of it, it came from someone who rarely spoke and always just observed.  It was Stephanie Plum.

“I don’t care what you think.  You’re nothing but a bumbling, bounty hunter who accidentally succeeds from time to time,” was the immediate reaction from Dr. Kay Scarpetta (she was busy in her autopsy room with forensic evidence, detailing everything to solve yet another crime).  “Besides, you’re paranoid.”

“I’ll give you something to be paranoid about,” she said as she defiantly pulled herself to her full 4’11” height, fists clenched.  I can have an opinion just like everyone else here.  This is just as much my bookshelf as it is the rest of yours,” Stephanie said in response while secretly sticking her tongue out at Dr. Scarpetta.

“How childish.”

“Yeah, maybe, but at least we have fun.”

“You go, girl!” Lula piped in.  (She’s Stephanie Plum’s sidekick and all around comic relief in the humorous series of stories.)  She was standing there in a challenging pose looking like an overripe plum haphazardly stuffed into a orange and purple spandex outfit.

“They’ve got to be good and decent people,” said the Khalil Gibran.  The statement came as almost a whisper from the far side of the bookshelf.  He continued, “Take a good look at yourselves.  You’re fiction and nonfiction.  You range from mysteries to romance novels.  You are biographies and history.  Our diversity speaks volumes about their thoughts, their values and their character.

Look at your bookshelves.  What would their “bewitching hour” conversations be like? 

More of these bookshelf chats in the future.

       Web Site: Bicycle Tales

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Reviewed by KJ Jacobs 1/27/2009
Interesting story, Richard. You must have a vivid imagination. It reminds me of "Babes in Toyland." I don't know how old you are, but the toys came alive after the children were asleep. I guess that dates me. LOL. Good job! KJ Jacobs

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