I never been any good at this Story Tellin Shit so Bear With Me a’ight?

Obie Don’t Give History Lessons.

You wanna Know Bout Obie?

Read My Bio.

That’s what it’s There For.

On the other hand some things ain’t Common Knowledge.

That’s why I’m tellin you all this shit now.

So if I start off all wrong it’s cause I’m nervous but I’ll get better as I go along.

I know it.

I wanna find a real good place to start but I can’t.

I mean I just don’t know where a Good Place would be.

Should I Start At The Beginnin and Move Forward?

Or should I Start From Today and Take Y’all Back?

And why am I askin you?

If we start from today then I’m Obie One.

But what person that breathes more than twice a hour don’t Know That Already?

I’m Twenty Eight Rich and Incredibly Handsome:

Six Foot Six 245 pounds a Lean Muscle Mass with hazel eyes and Shoulder Length Sun Streaked sandy blonde hair I always wear pushed back with one a my Trademark Head Bands.

I also have a Monster Ego.

I might a Failed To Mention that.

My mother was White, my father is Half White

(Mixed is what they callin it These a Ma Days).

Accordin to my brother that makes me Way Past Mixed, or

as Buster Rhymes so eloquently put it last year at the Soul Train Music Awards:

The Whitest Black Man In History.

That’s Quite A’ight though.

Lack a Color ain’t Killed Me Yet.

Neither has the Three Million White Jokes I endure each year.

And if I’m Way Past Mixed, what the hell does my brother JR call His Self,

Since he got Two Mixed Parents?

All Mixed Up.

As If.

Anyway...

To be Young Gifted and Black is Where It’s At, you feel me?

When someone asks me why my belief in God is so strong I tell em:

Look At My Life, dog.

Where would I be without my Jesus?

I ain’t Set Out to be a dancer, I simply Became a dancer.

Me & my Brother From Another Mother JR started dancin when we was eleven.

One minute we was dancin on a street corner, next minute we was famous.

World Famous Davis to be exact.

If it wasn’t for dancin I’d be in prison now,

one jail term in a string a bids for Petty Crimes & Cons.

Hustles? I had a million of em, more hustles than jokes and Jokes I Got, Folks.

God Showers His Blessins down upon me Continuously.

Nudgin me back on the right path whenever I fuck up.

I never been in love before.

I’m not Braggin or Complainin.

I’m just Statin The Facts Ma’am.

Up til now I been Very Under Interested in the whole Love Process.

Unlike many men my age I am NOT Tired a The Game.

Au Contraire Mein Fried, I LOVE The Game and if it was up to me

I’d Stay In The Game forever.

The Girls The Girls they Love Me, and I Love Em Right Back–

Usually Two & Three At A Time.

But that’s Common Knowledge.

And all this ain’t Sittin Too Well with Princess.

She the reason I’m Outta The Game.

Cess thinks I’m a Ho.

That is Plain & Simply Under Fair: very very much so.

I am Not A Ho.

I am a Very Sexually Active Person.

VERY Sexually Active.

Group Sex is one a the Truly Magnificent Perks a Stardom.

I didn’t make this shit the way it is I’m simply playin by the rules so,

Don’t Hate The Playa Hate The Game?

How Trite.

It’s more like Master The Game or Sit Your Ass Down.

So who is Cess and what is she to me?

Cess is gonna Marry Me and Have My Baby.

Only she lightweight Don’t Exactly Know It Yet.

Oh I keep tellin her.

And she keep laughin and sayin Not In A Million Years Obie.

But I know.

Cess is my Road Dog my Homie my Ace In The Hole; the Keeper a My Secrets.

It’s been Me & Her since the Day I Laid Eyes On Her.

Where I got this Vast Expanse a Lightly Tanned Flesh

Cess is Coal Dark & Luscious.

I would KILL to be that dark.

She got long jet black hair flowing down to the middle a her back

(it’s Not A Weave)

razored cheekbones and chinky black eyes.

The smile from her big beautiful lips lights up my entire existence

and her exquisite pink tongue is tipped with a sterling silver ball.

She’s Five Eleven which is still Seven Inches Shorter than me and 179

Jam Packed Pounds.

The ‘Girl ain’t Fat or Flabby.

She Round, dog.

Drop Dead Gorgeous. Her Taut Muscular Frame got these Prime Titties she keep Insistin is a C but I say

they More Like A Small D, thick luscious Hips & Thighs and a Bangin Back Side.

All Made Complete by Killer Abs.

Every time I look at Cess I Get Weak.

But That Ain’t Why I’m crazy bout her.

When you been with as many girls as me Physical Beauty don’t Do It For You.

What I’m crazy bout is Cess’s Mind: her Strength a Purpose,

her Single Minded Determination her Love a Our Lord Jesus Christ and

her eagerness to Get To Church every Sunday.

We ain’t never too tired for Jesus.

No matter how late we stay up Saturday night or what we was doin.

Intellectually we a Perfect Match.

I can’t tell you how many times we stayed up talkin but whether we discussed

Bosnia or The Bible Cess’s Quick Wit and Opinions ain’t Made Me Sorry I

Stayed Up Yet.

Cess is Kind & Funny too but she ain’t no Push Over.

She’ll Place You in a New York Minute if she feels Dissed or Played,

Specially if it’s Cause She’s A Woman and I Love That.

I Don’t Want It if it’s That Easy.

A Meek Mild Mannered Woman who goes along with Every Thing I Say

would bore the shit outta me in No Time At All.

I want a woman who can not only Walk Through Fire but can Breathe Fire Too,

a woman with Her Own Mind and Her Own Opinions.

Too many women either have Nothin On They Minds cept Shoppin or they too busy

Tryna Impress to give you they Honest Thoughts.

I guess that’s why I always put Fallin In Love in the same category as catchin AIDS:

Incurable and ultimately leadin to a Long Slow Painful Death.

Bein with Princess has really Changed My Mind.

Mark This On Your Calendar, Folks.

Princess is gonna Marry Me; and Have My Baby.

I’m Not In Love (so Don’t Forget It) but I could Get There.

Marryin Princess wouldn’t be like Goin To Jail.

And if I hafta dodge the Occasional Coffee Cup flung at my head well...

It’s Worth the Price a Admission.

Oh yeah...

By the way...

One more thing I forgot to tell you:

Princess is my cousin.