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Karen Lynn Vidra, The Texas Tornado

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Pig Lessons.
By Karen Lynn Vidra, The Texas Tornado
Wednesday, September 22, 2010

Rated "PG" by the Author.

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A young adolescent boy is forced to carry a pig as his punishment after making fun of some overweight people.

I should have never opened my mouth and said what I did when I saw those fat people at the beach last weekend.  Now my grandma is punishing me by making me carry a young pig, as a way of seeing what these people have to go through.

If you ask me, I think it is one of the stupidest punishments I have ever heard of.  We live on a farm, so we have animals about.  I have to carry this pig, and it's embarrassing having to explain to everyone why I am doing this. 

It would have been a lot easier carrying a sign that reads something like this: "I made fun of fat people." 

Or maybe not.  At least it's better than having to lug ol' Porky around!

I think fat people are gross.  I have always made fun of them.  Then I moved in with grandma, and she heard me mouth off once too often, so now I am being punished.  I should have listened to her.  It is not nice to make fun of others; I could be in their shoes one day, she has always told me.  I guess she had had enough of my teasing when we'd gone to the beach last weekend, and now I am paying for my "crime".

I have to take Porky to school, out to see my friends, even to church.  It's embarrassing when he starts to squeal or has to do his business; more than once he's downloaded onto the floor, and people are like, "Ewww! Gross!!"  I'm trying to act nonchalant as I clean up his "accidents", and by this time, I'm more than ready to turn Porky into a pile of porcine bacon!!

This punishment started yesterday.  I have one week to go.  If I behave myself, then Porky goes back into the barn where he belongs.  I can't wait; Porky is only a young pig, but he weighs over 50 pounds, and my arms are about to fall off!  I am just glad that grandma didn't do this when Porky gets full grown; there's no way I could carry a full-grown pig around!

Trust me, I will never open my mouth and make smart comments about others ever again! I don't want to think of having to do this again; it's totally humiliating, and now everyone is going to call me "Pig-Boy" or other pig-related monikers!  Having to do this once is more than enough!!

*to be continued.*

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Reviewed by Patrick Granfors 10/2/2010
This is funny as heck! Patrick
Reviewed by Carole Mathys 9/24/2010
Now that is a grandma that knows how to make a point...well done!
peace, Carole~
Reviewed by Paul Berube 9/22/2010
Great write, Karen. A lesson learned.
Reviewed by Sage Sweetwater 9/22/2010
This is a hoot, Karen Lynn! This needs to be submitted to a country farm magazine! I bet you could get it published. There's a moral and it's so hilarious! I raised pigs in the country when I was a young girl, so I can relate well. Grandmas are good equalizers in the punishment well you and Karla.

Reviewed by Karla Dorman, The StormSpinner 9/22/2010
Oh, no!!! That would be mortifying ... but hopefully, he'll have learned a lesson. Excellent story, Karen, well done.

(((HUGS))) and love, Karla.

I like Gramma's comment that this young man could be in their shoes one day. Indeed.

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