Monday, April 9, 2012, Nashville, Tennessee, nearly 6:00 a.m. in the morning~
Good morning! Just opened my eyes not even five minutes ago. Am lying here, writing on my computer, looking at my beautiful wife lying next to me, where she continues her slumber. Meanwhile, I've been up nearly all night long with this pain! Having a neuromuscular disorder HURTS. It's worse than a tootheache at times!
My caretaker, Cindy, has been rubbing pain ointment on my legs and arms, but it just doesn't seem to touch it. So I lie here and bear it. I should be used to this pain by now, but at times, I'm not, to tell you the truth. At times it is so bad it is all I can do from yelling or crying.
I just lay in bed, listening to the hiss-click of my ventilator and watching the numbers and lights bouncing on my monitors, praying for sleep, but sleep never came. I got maybe two hours of sleep last night, I think, and I am tired. Bone tired.
Stupid neuromuscular pain! GRRR!!
Anyway, I hope and pray you had a good Easter. We sure did. It is nice to be home with my family and see my brothers and sisters who live out of state again. I got to meet my new brother and sister, Akihiko and Camille. They are just adorable, but Akihiko is a live wire. He kinda reminds me of myself when I was his age. Active! WOW!! It made ME tired just watching him!
Mom looks great and Daddy, he's aged somewhat: he has more grey shot through his black hair. Don't blame him: with all the guff he's had to face with us kids, it's not surprising that Daddy's hair is turning grey. Mom's hair is grey, too, but she hides it, thanks to Lady Clairol. She knows she is a grandmother 13 times over, but she doesn't want to let others know that. She has too much pride. :)
Yesterday, we all went to church; it was wonderful seeing Pastor Bilkey preach the Message of Easter and hearing the music! I got to help out by acting as interpreter for the deaf members of the congregation; it is an honor to be able to do this. I happen to enjoy it very much, and I always get to meet new people. The music was powerful and my sister sang "The Old Rugged Cross". Ronee' always does a wonderful job, but I felt a twinge of jealousy; I always do when Ronee' sings because she can still do it whereas I CAN'T.
I miss singing like that. I always loved to sing and now it's just too much of an effort for me. And it's hard to try to control my breathing when the ventilator is assisting it. Sometimes the rhythm can catch me off guard; I always have to pause (or think) whenever I speak. It's a real pain!
After church, we all piled into the family bus, where we then motored over to Golden Corral. I am sure the staff didn't appreciate being inundated by a huge party of over 80 people when they were already "hopping" busy, but they already know about our group, so they kindly led us all to the back room, where they have parties, and we soon enjoyed family togetherness and a freshly cooked hot meal. The food, as always, was good! I loaded up on meatloaf, veggies, and pie. YUM!! AND I got a blue Easter egg that had Tootsie Rolls tucked inside. My favorite! :)
I'm just hankful that Cindy, our helper, was with me. I piled my plate high with food; she had to carry it while I motored around in my electic wheelchair. I no longer have the strength to carry my plate; someone else has to do it for me.
We sat there and talked and laughed as we ate. The younger kids ran around, hopped up on sugar and candy, and we adults just sat, talked about family things, the weather, our lives, and told clean jokes, enjoying the camraderie. My darling wife sat there, demurely, just enjoying the family togetherness and the good food. She is so pretty; I sure picked out a winner in her! There is only one Rebekka R. Cohen, and I am so glad that God put her into my life! I just love her so much!!
Mom was enjoying her grandbabies: she kept hugging and kissing them at any chance she could get. Daddy was happily showing the younger ones some finger-games he had learned as a child and showing them old pictures of us he carried around in his wallet (how embarrassing!). The grandkids were fascinated to discover that we were once that little. I do think that Daniel, one of Lightning's children, kind of hurt Daddy's feelings when he piped up with: "Gee, Grampa, you musta been born at th' time of the dinosaurs! You're OLD!!!"
Daniel also couldn't believe the picture of his mother when she was 15 years old. He always thought that she had been a grownup. LOL
Daddy got sort of quiet after that remark about how old he was. LOL
Of course, Ginger, my service dog, got lots of attention. People saw her sitting beside me, wearing her blue-and-gold service uniform; they were itching to pet her, but they knew better, for my dog was working and was on duty, and when she is wearing her uniform, she cannot be distracted. I hated telling people that they couldn't pet her because she was on duty, but Ihink they understood. Ginger just sat there, beside me, tongue lolling happily out of her mouth, her nose working overtime as she smelled the delicious odors of the food. She was a good dog and even got some meatloaf and water for behaving herself. Ginger loves Golden Corral's food; the meatloaf is her favorite! :)
Ronee' was embarrassing me, though ... she laughs loud, and once she gets going, there's no stopping her. I know people in the next section must have heard her; they kept looking our way. She must have ate some giggle-infused jello, or the Coke bubbles must have set off her funny bone. She was bouncing in her chair and laughing uproariously at any little thing!
I wish I had some of that joy! Ronee' is one of the happiest people I know!
Well, I am going to get off of here and try to get some sleep! I hate not being able to sleep; this insomnia (and stupid neuromuscular pain) is about to get on my LAST nerve! Pray that I get some sleep (or some releif from the pain!); I could really use both big time! Any and all prayers would be greatly appreciated! Take care and may God bless you always; I'll write in here another time!