(August 11, 2006)
She must have pressed the mute button because not even a peep escaped her immobile lips. She looked like a stone, all stiff and heavy. And it's not like it happened only once; it was ongoing, driving people away. Yeah, people said hi or winked but that was the end of the conversation, if you can even call it that to begin with. And if they attempted to mingle with her, the chat died rather quickly because she hardly said anything.
Was there something wrong with her? Was there something she was ashamed of? Maybe it was fear. But of what? No one was gonna laugh at her and certainly no one would bite. Yet, she kept herself trapped in the cocoon, and that only drove people away like some deadly disease. She morphed into a freak no one desired to approach. The facial expression on her face was always the same, as if she was unsatisfied with life and its surroundings. The aura around her was not that of come join me but one of stay far away and let me be. And what did that bring her. Nothing...Only isolation in a colorful adventurous world.
There had to be an explanation to this weirdness. And there was one. Whenever she had the urge to be heard she just choked, her mind becoming blank with no thought flow. She assumed that whatever escaped her lips would be deemed stupid and boring. Plus, she found it hard to figure out what to talk about even if there was much she could say. So, since she kept to herself most of the time, it became like second nature, and she didn't see things happening any other way. Of course, people didn't know that and just assumed that she had no desire to be gregarious.
This was a rather serious problem but it could be corrected if she only had the willpower to give it a shot. But was she willing to go through the agony of morphing into a butterfly rather than remaining a caterpillar for the rest of her life? That remained unknown. And though she did break through occasionally, most of the time she still locked herself up from the world...
© Copyright 2007 by Lena Kovadlo
Featured in my book An Unforgettable Journey