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kg cummings

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Featured Book
Along Came A Spider: A Personal Look At Madness
by Maryanne Raphael

Along Came A Spider, A Personal Look at Madness is the true story of a woman's descent into insanity and her successful struggle to reach sanity. Based on intimate d..  
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Books by kg cummings
Welcome... With Wrath 02
By kg cummings
Saturday, December 12, 2009

Rated "PG" by the Author.

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Recent stories by kg cummings
· 01 Tommy & Renée
· Welcome... With Wrath 03
· Welcome... With Wrath 01
· Stories from the Nam
· 32 Tommy & Renée
· 31 Tommy & Renée
· 30 Tommy & Renée
           >> View all 39


(from my 3rd novel in the WWW series)opening old wounds...

“I fell in love with her when I saw the picture of Dusty.  She didn’t buy me a new pony, or the biggest, fastest, shiniest, be the first on your block to own gadget being offered that season. Renée drew something I loved, and gave it to me to keep forever.  Everything she gave me came from her heart.  She also made a homemade gingerbread man and woman.  She hand decorated them, and had printed our names on them with sugar frosting.  Beth, I didn’t know people made those things.  I thought you bought them at stores.”

Beth laughed.  “My old boyfriend Bruce used to call himself the gingerbread man.  I don’t know how he came up with that.  But he’d always say that’s why they couldn’t catch him when I’d tell him he’d get in trouble for whatever mischief he was about to get into.”

Tom laughed.  “It sounds like Bruce was quite a character.  I ate my gingerbread man until he was in the shape of a small heart, then I put it in her mouth.  She hugged me, and cried like a baby.  I could’ve saved a bundle on Christmas gifts if I would have known how much that little piece of cookie was going to mean to her.  She meant the world to me.  I loved her before I made love with her.  Renée was babysitting for a family in another neighborhood on New Year’s Eve.  After the kids were asleep, she snuck me into the house.  We started to kiss, and with no supervision, or interruptions, we didn’t stop.  Neither one of us had any experience.  We just did it, and didn’t know what we were doing.  But, it sure felt good.  Every chance we got after that we were all over each other.  Instead of dating, she babysat, and when the coast was clear, I’d be in there.  I lived and breathed just to be with her whether we made love, or not, but to be honest, we couldn’t not have sex if the opportunity was there.”

Beth blushed.  “Ummm, I don’t feel so bad now.  I got pregnant before I got married, my first time, and we only did it once.  Did you two use something?”

“No, we didn’t know what birth control was.  We were just lucky I guess.  Well, for a little while anyway.”

Beth smiled, “So eventually you got caught, got married and…”

“Not quite.  After a while, my parents started insisting that I take out other girls.  When I told Renée, she thought I wanted to break up, and started to cry.  I broke down.  On my knees, I promised her that she was the one I loved, but the only way I could see her was to play their game.  So, Lydia got dinner, and the movies.  Then, I’d take her home, or else I’d drop her off where ever she wanted to go.  We wouldn’t even kiss good night.  Any way, I’d leave, and go have sex with Renée.”

“Tom!  That’s horrible!  It’s the same thing that Bruce pulled on Alicia.  He took me everyplace nice, and then he ended up getting her pregnant.  He left her with a kid, and a tarnished reputation.”  Beth didn’t look very impressed.

“I know what it looked like, but I swear to God, I wasn’t just using her.  I truly loved that girl.  I sent her red roses on Valentine’s Day, a thirty thousand pound box of chocolates, and I gave her a 14k gold bracelet with a heart shaped charm that had our names engraved on it.  She gave me something I’d never had in my whole life, unconditional love.  After basketball season, we’d talk, do our homework, and we’d make love whenever we could.  Renée was my whole life and she knew it, but outside of school, it looked like she was my whore.  My guilt is unbearable.”  Tom thought reflectively.  “She baked me a German Chocolate cake for my birthday when I turned seventeen.  It had chocolate coconut frosting with nuts in it.  It was my first home made birthday cake.  During spring break we were together everyday for nearly two weeks.  Then, she missed her period, and wasn’t sure what that meant.  Her mother finally asked her if she was pregnant when she noticed the signs.  Renée didn’t know.  My parents were livid, accusing her of being a gold digger… just wanting to up her social position by trapping an Ericsen, blah, blah, blah.  I wanted to marry her, but that was out of the question.  She was still fourteen, and I had just turned seventeen.  My parents paid to have her sent to a nice home for unwed mothers.  She dropped out of school.  My heart was broken.”

            “I’m sure it was.  I’m so sorry for what I just said.  It just seemed so similar to my own situation.”  She was genuinely sorry for Tom.  She also knew how scared Renée must have felt.  Beth was eighteen, and could make her own decisions when she realized that she was pregnant, and it was still frightening.

            “So, you got pregnant, too.  Is Bruce Jason’s father?”

            “Oh, no.  I never had sex with Bruce.  I’ve only had sex with my husband.”

            “I’ve only had sex with Renée.  How come you didn’t have sex with Bruce?”

            “I loved him, but he never swept me off my feet in that special way.  One time I thought we would have sex, but we didn’t have a place.”

            “Would you now if you had the chance?”

            Beth smiled fondly.  “No chance.  Bruce will always hold a special place in my heart.  He was killed a short time after being sent to Viet Nam.”

        “That’s really sad.  I’m sorry.”

“Thank you.  Your life story is sad, too.”

“Beth listen, even though I grew up rich and spoiled, I’ve always felt that I was dealt a bad hand in this life.  I’ve always had to strive to be perfect, and be the best, just to feel like I mattered.”

            “That is so shocking.  You come from such a fine family.  You had everything that most people only dream about having.  The ranch is beautiful.  It looks like you had a perfect life.”

            “I know it.  And, that is exactly the image my family intended to put forth.  Now that you know my family is filthy rich, I’ll tell you they also have a dirty little secret…  My father used to slap my mother around.  He wasn’t any where near as violent as some men, but he’d slap her for the stupidest things.  I hate myself whenever I lose my temper, and yell at people.  You know, when you grow up around that, it’s so easy to unintentionally pick it up.”

            “Tom, did you slap Renée?” 

            “Oh, God, no.  No, I never even raised my voice to her.  Renée was the love of my life.”

            “I don’t know how you could not talk about her.  You obviously loved her very much.”

“I buried it deep within my soul.  I had to Beth.  My parents are such snobs.  Mom might have bent the ‘rules’ so I could talk a little, but knowing how Dad would slap her if he found out, it was better just to keep my mouth shut.”

            “Could you talk to her parents, or did they hate you for getting their daughter ‘in trouble’?”           

             “Well, they didn’t exactly shake my hand, or pat me on the back, and say congratulations, but they didn’t go totally nuts either.  It didn’t take too long for them to figure out that I was almost as naive as Renée.  I gave her a promise ring set with both of our birthstones on the day that I said good-bye to her.  I promised her my total undying love forever.  Her parents still welcomed me into their home to visit with them after she went away.  That’s when they realized that I wasn’t a spoiled rich kid who was just sowing his wild oats on a girl from ‘down in the boondocks’.  One time, I brought a teddy bear to her parents house to take up to Renée.  They could visit her, I couldn’t.  Unwed fathers have no rights.  My parents had me followed, only I was too young and dumb to notice.  If they hadn’t seen me carry that bear out of the house, they wouldn’t have guessed where I was going.  They took my car away as punishment.  I couldn’t see her family any more.  There was no public transportation going out to where she lived.  I would call them regularly to check on her.  To keep busy, I poured my life into playing basketball.  I knew it was my ticket to financial freedom.”

 

       Web Site: kgcummings

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Reviewed by Felix Perry 12/12/2009
Great chapter and reflective look back for him.
fee
Reviewed by Karen Lynn Vidra, The Texas Tornado 12/12/2009
You write so well, Kathy; I am captivated by your talents as a writer! Very well penned; brava!

(((HUGS))) and much love, your friend in Tx., Karen Lynn. :D

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