Don't want to tell you my real name: everyone knows me as "Tears". I am 12 years old.
I'm also homeless.
I live on the streets in Fort Worth, Texas.
Family ditched me when they found out that I got pregnant last year at the age of 11. Been on my own ever since. (Doesn't matter now: I ended up losing the baby. Born dead, after carrying it for nine months. It was a little boy. Buried him in the garbage. It still hurts when I think of it. Maybe it was for the best because his mamma sure as hell couldn't have given him a good life, plus he was born handicapped.)
I have many friends who watch out over me. Some of my closest friends include Bright Eyes, Rica, Q-Man, and Charilie-the-Crazy (that is, when he's lucid; guy's touched in the head). I had more friends, but they died. Lost too many friends, more than I can count: Shoeless Joe. Gracie-the-Bag-Lady. Eek. Vet-Man. Suede. Marlon. Sissie-Jo. All are with God now, in Heaven.
I miss them, but not as bad as my own son. His name would have been Seth Abraham.
Every week, a local church feeds us a good home-cooked meal before their Wednesday night services. Then we go to church after we eat, where we fellowship, pray, and worship God. I sometimes feel sad during church because I feel like God doesn't even hear my prayers. My prayer is that I find a family and a home to live in. I hate being homeless!!
When I go to the school nearest the shelter where I stay sometimes, the other kids say I stink and tease me bad. They don't want to have anything to do with me. I don't have any friends at school.
It's like I'm invisible, a ghost-child, to them.
It's been hot this summer. I've spent a lot of time hanging out at the local library (Central Library; it's right downtown Fort Worth) before they throw me out. It's where I spend my days reading or playing/writing on the computer. Then someone sees me, and I usually get thrown out, even though I keep to myself. I don't bother anybody!
Well, I'm gonna see if I can get something in my belly; if I don't eat I get sick to my stomach and get shaky. I will write in here again soon; until later, this is Tears saying so long! God bless and keep us homeless people in your prayers when you go to bed at night! Pray someone can help us better our lives; a lot of us didn't ask to end up this way (even though I did, when I disgraced my family)!
As always, your new friend, Tears. :(
*To be continued.*