Just now I dreamed I was falling into a misshapen black hole; a tunnel, actually.
When I looked at who was going into the tunnel, however, I saw it was not me, but a little girl of about five or six.
I ‘knew’ she was acting as my ‘stand-in’. Along with this knowing came the awareness of her doing this quite regularly, thus keeping ‘me’ from the pain of whatever horror is happening, or about to happen. She is usually the one to go down the hole, rarely me.
What I know is: this little girl is me, or, a part of me; an aspect.
Why then, do I feel only resentment toward her? Why do I dislike her so much? And, why must she always be the one to experience discomfort, punishment?
It has taken most of my life here on earth to even begin to discover the why of it.
Finally I can see the Tunnel, and know it is me, with all my aspects joined together as One, who joyfully leaps into the Tunnel of Living.
It is a Passage, a journey into experiencing life here on Earth.
And it is all right, no matter what.
~~~
All rights reserved
Copyright February 1992
Judith Leigh Bailey