Join Free! | Login    
   Popular! Books, Stories, Articles, Poetry
Where Authors and Readers come together!


Featured Authors:  W. Craig Reed, iAmy Sellers, iByron Edgington, iJames Boyle, iJohn DeDakis, iD.E.Z. Butler, iSam Penny, i

  Home > History > Stories
Popular: Books, Stories, Articles, Poetry     

Cynth'ya Lewis

· + Follow Me
· Contact Me
· Sponsor Me!
· Success story
· Books
· Articles
· Poetry
· News
· Stories
· Blog
· 890 Titles
· 4,922 Reviews
· Save to My Library
· Share with Friends!
Member Since: Nov, 2002


Subscribe to the Cynth'ya Lewis Newsletter. Enter your name and email below and click "sign me up!"
Cynth'ya Lewis, click here to update your pages on AuthorsDen.

Featured Book
FREE DOWNLOAD Cyclopedia of Economics
by Sam Vaknin

Cyclopedia of issues in economics analyzed through the prism of the economies of countries in transition, emerging markets, and developing countries. ..  
BookAds by Silver
Gold and Platinum Members

AARP Ain't Gettin' Mine
By Cynth'ya Lewis
Monday, September 13, 2004

Rated "G" by the Author.

Share    Print  Save   Follow

Recent stories by Cynth'ya Lewis
· Cynth'ya's Personal Journey
· Flash Scribble
· Cynth'ya's Vita
· my mayan oasis
· affe-X-tion?
· When People Hurt You. . . .
· Bob's Story
           >> View all 82

Considering the sobering mental moments of realizing that I no longer have a reason to be upset at people for calling me "Ma'am" anymore, there are some unspoken advantages to this 50-thing. And it might be kind of interesting. . .

Well, just got officially ushered into the "croak zone" and ain't no turnin' back. LOL. But seriously, croakin' ain't funny unless you're a frog that just missed the fisherman's hook. (Frogs refer to that as "death by shrimping")

Really, long life runs among the sensible in mi familia, and the best part is nobody will ever again question me for saying the words, "honey I'm old enough to be your mother" if they try and ask me out on a date, notwithstanding that Martha Rae scenario. Oh well, I'm still old enough to be friends with their mother and besides, in five more years: 39% OFF DISCOUNTS AT THE GOODWILL ON WEDNESDAYS!

Now to get into training for my impending Senior-dom, I need to lose at least three dress sizes to be able to look better than most women worn out by men, kids, and men who act like kids. More than likely, if I stay on course and just keep away from young people food (you know. . .junk), I just might be able to squeeze into all those classy outfits tossed out of the closet by young divorcees who did too much emotional eating when I was their age. And since they'll probably be working on husband number three and boyfriend number 11, the pickin's will be oh so sweet and sublime.

And, for every reward given, a price has to be paid. . . daily exercise. (Ugggh!)

But lookee here ya'll. I think the reason my relatives look so good for their age is 'cause none of us "kids" in my chronological category ever witnessed any of our older relatives sitting around on their butts complaining about "what is" and "what ain't". Truth be told, what is "is" and what ain't "ain't" and unless you know someone to get you a National Guard deferment, that's just the way life is going to be. . .an "is", or an "ain't"

Fifty is, for me, (and I mean this) more of a point, rather than an age. It's telling me (now this is FIFTY talkin' ya'll)

"Reed, honey you've reached this 'point' to where you've been blessed enough to both SEE history and BE history. How you deal with people who get on your nerves will go one of two ways. . . raise your blood pressure and kill you, or allow you to tell them exactly how you feel, because hey, at 50, you CAN!

So, I thought up a little rhyme, goes a lil' sump'n like this:

I'm nifty 50 now, oh yes I a-ammmm;

God has been good to me, and still I sta-annnd

If I should dis-agree on things with you-ou-ou

You best not hold your breath, or you'll turn blu-ue-ue.


It's my philosophy to be my-se-elf,

I live in my own skin, and no one el-l-lsse,

So if I should get on your last of ner-rves,

Just hit the road and Jack please don't trip on the cur-rvvves.

All in all, if you don't celebrate yourself, don't wait for a party invitation from anybody else to give you permission to toot your own horn.

TOOTY TOOT TOOT ya'll, I'll start writing poetry again by Friday. . . unless I change my mind.

Why, because I'm 50, and I can! And if anybody's got a red hat with a purple feather on it, my head is medium size.


       Web Site: Cynth'ya Lewis Reed at the AuthorsDen

Want to review or comment on this short story?
Click here to login!

Need a FREE Reader Membership?
Click here for your Membership!

Reviewed by Karla Dorman, The StormSpinner 10/8/2007
I hope I look as good at 50 as you do. :) Happy belated!

(((HUGS))) and love, Karla.
Reviewed by Karen Lynn Vidra, The Texas Tornado 9/14/2004
only 50? nawww, don't believe it for one second! y'all look great; hope i look as good as you when i reach fifty (in only five short years; yikes!)! may be 45 now, but feel more like 85! stupid joints...LOL

(((HUGS))) and love, your friend in tx., karen lynn. :D

happy birthday, sweetie; have a blast on your special day! :D
Reviewed by Peter Paton 9/14/2004
Cynth'ya...You wear it well...
God Bless

Popular History Stories
1. World War 2: memories of North Africa
2. Le beau monde de notre enfance
3. Age
4. Refections From WWII - My Mother
5. A Travesty of Western Justice
6. Thoughts about that War in Vietnam: 50 Ye
7. Connaissez-vous l'histoire de la Hara?

Columbia River Gorge: Natural Treasure on the Old Oregon Trail by Cheri Dohnal

An in-depth look at the Gorge past & present, it's role as the final leg of the Oregon Trail, and some of the more interesting characters it has hosted during the past 200 years. T..  
BookAds by Silver, Gold and Platinum Members

America's Greatest Blunder: The Fateful Decision to Enter World War On by Burton Pines

America had no reason to enter WWI. By doing so, it broke the battlefield stalemate, allowing Britain & France to impose a punishing peace on Germany - which led to Hitler, World W..  
BookAds by Silver, Gold and Platinum Members

Authors alphabetically: A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z

Featured Authors | New to AuthorsDen? | Add AuthorsDen to your Site
Share AD with your friends | Need Help? | About us

Problem with this page?   Report it to AuthorsDen
AuthorsDen, Inc. All rights reserved.