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Sandra Ferrara Gentry

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Emotional Terrorist
By Sandra Ferrara Gentry
Thursday, May 10, 2007

Rated "PG13" by the Author.

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A mother desperate to save her gulable and naive daughter from the clutches of a self destructive, bi-polar admitted drug addict she calls her boyfriend.

Emotional Terrorist

Letting anger get the best of us

Arguing about our 18 yr old’s decisions

She is in uncharted waters and is floating directionless

She’s angry with him but feels no one will ever love her again.

She knows the mistakes she’s made have come with a heavy price

Her morals have been diminished in the name of a clueless devotion

to a toxic poison she calls her boyfriend.

She is young and knows not of what true love really consists of

But she wants to, desperately.

She wishes for things to be different , but thinks she lacks the backbone to stand up for what she believes in, for fear it will leave her lonely and alone.

She knows she is better off without him, but fears being alone.

She knows her family is always here for her, but family love isn’t the same.

Adult love, sharing your time with someone special.

She feels he is the only one who can show her this.

But she is wrong.

The right man is out there, but she doesn’t have enough incentive to find him.

The poison her boyfriend,(if you can call him that) has injected into her psyche,

eats away at her self-esteem and self-confidence, draining her of any remaining self-worth, so he can tighten the rubber hosing around her arm, and continue injecting his poison into her until.....

Until she succumbs to his brand of terrorism- he is the worst kind of terrorist- the emotional terrorist. Because that is what he is. He destroys the lives of everyone unfortunate enough to be in the vicinity of his unspeakable acts. He blames others for his troubles, he accepts no responsibility for the collateral damage he incurs while following through on his plans of total annihilation. He is the suicide bomber of relationships. He self destructs, then seeks forgiveness only to self-destruct over and over again. He is addicted to hurting himself and the one’s closest to him.

She is seduced into his selfish, self centered claws. His lies have become unhinged, and the pin has diminished. All that is left is his desperation to possess her the drugs.

There are no limits to the insatiable craving to possess every last drop of her, turning her into damaged goods. She can’t escape his grip, she is weak and weary. The miles of broken glass she’s crawled over in the short time they’ve been together has left her scarred and unwilling...

To try and survive yet another train wreck that may be forthcoming. Can’t put herself through that again. Desperate to hold on, for she truly feels there will not be another.

Yet, we fight and argue over what to do, how to help her. Putting our own relationship in jeopardy, taking opposing sides, creating our own poison.

We love her so and are desperate to save her, but she wants to be saved on her terms...she cannot figure out how to escape his evil clutches that choke the life out of a once vibrant, cheerful and intelligent young woman. She is now saddened by what she has allowed her life to become, but she doesn’t want to change it. The drama and excitement seduce her at every turn...continuing to destroy the family, standing by, that loves her so, and are awaiting her return....what are parents supposed to do? She’s almost 19, let her make her own mistakes? That just brings the drama and danger to our doorstep. He is the black cloud...raining  acid rain on her life parade. Her younger sisters shake their heads in disbelief, wondering when the terrorist will release his emotional hostage.....

Sandra Ferrara Gentry 2007

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Reviewed by Regis Auffray 5/23/2007
I find this incredibly sad. I feel for her. I wish I could "fix" things for her. I have two daughters of my own. They've known their share of "sadly" negative energy guys. This really spoke to me, Sandra. I sure hope things will be well. This is not an easy world or and easy time. Love and peace,

Reviewed by Karen Lynn Vidra, The Texas Tornado 5/10/2007
Heartwrenching and chilling; very well done! Hope all ends well; you are in my prayers and thoughts....

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