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Karen Lynn Vidra, The Texas Tornado

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That's Not A Vegetable; That's My Daughter You're Talking About!
By Karen Lynn Vidra, The Texas Tornado
Thursday, September 06, 2007

Rated "G" by the Author.

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A mother vents out her frustrations when she hears other people talking about her daughter, who is severely brain damaged.

Just because Hope Giovanna can't talk or move doesn't mean she's any less of a person!

I hear you talking about her behind my back: I hear you talking about her when I go to the store, to the dentist's or doctor's office, to the post office, to her school, to the bank, out to eat--wherever.

I hear the hurtful comments, see the pitying stares, and I am here to tell you this: stop doing it; it makes me uncomfortable! I feel like I'm being judged or am on some kind of trial!

Let me explain a few things about my daughter so you don't continue making false judgements or accuse me of bad parenting. My daughter was born brain damaged: this is why she cannot talk, cannot move all that much, or do anything for herself.

Hope may be six, but she is like a baby. She cannot feed herself, dress herself, use the toilet, or do anything normal six-year-olds do. Yet she IS able to fee emotion, knows how to receive love and give it back to people in her smile, her happy noises, or her hugs, and can let you know how she is feeling or what she is experiencing via her word board, which is how she communicates.

Yes, caring for her is a twenty-four-hour job, but it is a job I wouldn't trade for all the money in the world. I am her mother, and she is my child. Even though she is severely handicapped, I still have a fierce love for my daughter; I can't imagine putting her into an institution or a hospital and just leave her; to do that would destroy the bond between us, and I want a much better life for my little girl.

Hope deserves all that life has to offer, the good or the bad; and I want to be there with her as she experiences it all!

I see the ugly faces or the stares you give to her whenever we go out to eat. I hear the ugly comments you make. "Don't bring her in here!" "Oh, the poor little thing!" "Such a waste; such a tragedy." I've heard it all, and frankly, I'm getting sick of it! Enough already!!

 I hear you calling her names, horrible names, names like Vegetable. Imbecile. Severely retarded. Moron. Stupid. Idiot. Don't you realize how damagning those names are to her--let alone, me?? I can't tell you how many times I've heard my baby crying at night because of some comment some joker made about her. Hope may not be able to talk, but she CAN hear. She's not that stupid!

Next time you see her, all I ask is this: please, please treat her as any child would want to be treated: with dignity and respect. Hope is not an object: she is a person, first and foremost, a person who was born severely handicapped! She deserves that much!

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Reviewed by Cynth'ya 9/10/2007
Speak loud and clear sister!
love and blessin's,
Reviewed by Michelle Kidwell Power In The Pen 9/8/2007
The ones who make suche comments are the idiots themselves
God Bless
Reviewed by Mary Coe 9/8/2007
I feel sorry for the idiots who make such comments. People can be so ignorant and cruel. This is a most touching and really heartfelt story. Very well penned. A masterpiece. The great love our a mother shines in this story. The pictures are beatiful and I love the title.
Reviewed by Tinka Boukes 9/8/2007
most touching piece!!

Love Tinka
Reviewed by M.Bennett Hooper (Mikii) 9/7/2007
Dearest Karen, I agree with Joyce and Gwendolyn, this story needs wider exposure. The idiots are those who make such comments. Love is more powerful than any other emotion and or experience. PLB&G for caring and sharing. < < < < <HUGS>>>> Mikii your friend in AR.
Reviewed by Joyce Bowling 9/6/2007
Very touching my friend, and also very realistic...and sad to see ignorant people whisper and talk about someone whom can't defend themselves...angers me! Write on dear friend...allow your voice to be heard loud and clear!!
Joyce B.
Reviewed by Gwendolyn Thomas Gath 9/6/2007

Heart touching read and the snares and nasty gestures of others is totally sickening. Karen you have penned another masterpiece with this one...and the title simply incredible! "That's Not A Vegetable; That's My Daughter You're Talking About" surely there should be an arena/avenue for such an article it would be nice if someone looked into it...this needs a more public display.

CLAP, CLAP to you!

Reviewed by Denise Contreras 9/6/2007
Your daughter Hope is a Child of God. It is terriable how some people treat people. It makes me very upset to hear things like that. Your are a special person Hope is blessed to have you as a mother.
God bless Hugs Angela
Reviewed by Mr. Ed 9/6/2007
Labeling, and name calling, and hating people different from ourselves has been going on since mankind first started walking this planet. Makes one very sadly wonder about the humanity of man.
Reviewed by Lewis Findley 9/6/2007
How cruel and insensitive can some people be.
Reviewed by Georg Mateos 9/6/2007
Only a cold hearted person can put labels to another person.
That same person can be labelled disgusting fat or ridiculos scrawny, ugly gnome or tall repulsive skeleton, or...
Some of those persons labelled themselves good-christians.
We do not now if a "retarded" child comprehends the abuse, but they hear it as we do all, and we can't say that the namecalling doesn't hurt them as it hurt us.
Reviewed by Karla Dorman, The StormSpinner 9/6/2007

Sad, how society wants to hide the disabled so they can't be seen. You speak powerfully for the rights of parents everywhere, for children, for adults with handicaps: well done. VERY well done *applause*

(((HUGS))) and love, Karla.

Books by
Karen Lynn Vidra, The Texas Tornado

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For Nil Consideration by Dave Brooks

The first in a series of books based around the fictional Sheraton Moss estate in Teesside... only this story actually happened! Based on the real life events of a traumatised teen..  
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For Nil Consideration by Dave Brooks

The first in a series of books based around the fictional Sheraton Moss estate in Teesside... only this story actually happened! Based on the real life events of a traumatised teen..  
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