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Recent stories by ANGELA WILSON
· Chapter 15 No One Knows..IT!!
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Chapter 4 from No One Knows.....It!
Saturday, October 06, 2007

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a chapter from my upcoming book "No One Knows ...It!"


Why didn't I see the signs? Now that I think about it the bastard did spend more time primping in the mirror than I did. Still my love for him allowed me to justify him as just being a pretty boy. Pretty boy my ass! My first thought was to run both of their asses down with my car but curiosity took hold of me. I wanted to see just what it was about this stranger that had my man creeping and shit. I could not believe my eyes! This poor ass excuse for a man was walking hand in hand with someone else; the worst part about the bull shit was the fact that it was another man! Nothing in my life prepared me for what I was seeing. I sat there inside my car and let the tears fall; unsure if I was hurt or pissed the fuck off! Something inside of me told me he was cheating but I ignored it, didn't want to believe that this perfect man was being unfaithful to me. They went inside a restaurant and from the other patrons that were wiggling their asses inside, I came to the conclusion that it was a restaurant where a lot of gay men went to. What am I saying? He's my husband, he's not gay! They were seated by a window which made it easier for me to watch them. First holding hands and now they were making goo-goo eyes at each other; he actually looked happy with this motherfucker! I started snapping pictures with my camera phone who ever invented this shit needed a serious congrats... I wanted evidence to give to my lawyer when I divorced his ass or went to trial for murder which ever came first! I sat there pissed the fuck off unsure of how to handle this situation. He was all excited and shit and acting like he didn’t have a care in this world! Well mister I have news for you life’s a bitch, then you hook up with one! I was dumb founded for a second or two; my husband the man who vowed to love and honor me had lost his fucking mind! They were in there all romantic and shit and before I knew it they were both leaning across the table preparing to kiss. The next thing I knew I was storming into the restaurant! "Kerry!” I screamed out as their lips parted. The nasty bastard looked as if he saw a ghost. I moved closer to the table where they were not sure of my next move. "Karina, what are you doing here?” he asked nervously. "What am I doing here? What the fuck are you doing here?” I asked as I tried my best to control my tears. "I was just having dinner with Steven.” He offered. "You lying bastard! I just watched the two of you hold hands and kiss! Now tell me what the fuck is going on?” Karina demanded. "Can we talk outside Karina? Let's not make a scene.” Kerry pleaded. "Fuck making a scene and fuck these nasty ass motherfuckers sitting up in here! I wonder how many of them have wives at home while they're out here with their man.” Karina shouted wanting everyone present to hear her. "Oh no she didn't, Miss Thang don't know she'll get her ass whipped up in here.” Someone shouted from behind her. "That's good for his ass, girl beat his ass!” a man shouted from across the room. "I just had to beat the fuck out of Alonzo last week for the same thing! I ain't mad at you girl. You want me to whip his ass for you?” another man dressed in drag shouted from the back of the room. "No I got this one! Thanks anyway and as for the first motherfucker who even thinks he's going to whip my ass, bitch beware!” she warned as she turned back to face Kerry. "Oh wait I'm going cut that bitch!” the first man shouted as he made his way toward Karina, then being stopped by the other guys who were defending her. "Let that girl whip his ass! Now Teekie girl you know you would be mad as hell if Leon stepped out on you like that! Hell you done had to beat his ass a few times yourself for creeping and shit!” "Let Miss Gurl do what ever she wants to cause he's wrong. Shit if he didn't want fish no more he should have told her. Its men like him who makes it hard for a girl like me.” The man from across the room shouted. "Outside now, Kerry!” Karina ordered. "She ain't playing! Girl you're right I'm sorry, do what you got to do." Teekie apologized. "Yeah because he's wrong!” the man from the back of the room shouted. Once outside Kerry held his head down not knowing what to say. Karina stood there for a minute before speaking. "So why Kerry? Are you gay?” Karina asked now annoyed. "I love you Karina but I enjoy being with men also.” Kerry admitted. "I don't want to hear that love shit! I want you to get your shit and get the fuck out of my life.” Karina said now calmer that she knew the truth. "I never wanted to hurt you Karina.” "Well you have Kerry and there's no way you can make up for this.” Karina stated as she headed back to her car. "Karina.” Kerry started saying before Karina closed the car door and drove off. He turned and went back into the restaurant to where his friend Steven was seated. Now ashamed and hurt he didn't feel like eating. He asked for the check and left the money on the table. As they headed out of the restaurant, they heard applause as the doors closed. They both knew it would be a long time before they would be able to show their face again. "I'm so sorry she found out this way." Steven stated. "Steven she's my wife and I have hurt her; she'll never forgive me for this!” Kerry cried. "I know baby but now we can be together now.” Steven stated. "First I have to fix this with Karina before I can even think about myself!” Kerry replied. "So does that mean I have to wait until she feels like she's ready to forgive you before we can have a life together?” Steven whined. "You will wait for as long as it takes! That's if you want to be with me.” Kerry stated unapologetic. He dropped Steven off at his house then went to find Karina; he knew she would not be at home so he drove around to where he thought she would be looking for her. Something inside of him wanted to believe that she would understand and then there was this other voice that told him she was going to beat the fuck out of his ass! Kerry drove around until he became sleepy, Steven was not making the situation any better; he kept calling Kerry's cell phone nonstop. He needed her to hear his side of the story. It was fucked up the way she found out but there really was no easy way to tell her. Kerry decided that it would not be wise to return to their home under the circumstances and searched for a hotel, he needed time to figure out what he was going to say. I sat at a bar that I came across while getting away from the motherfucker; Kerry had the nerves to tell me he loves me. I puffed on that cigarette and sipped the Hennessey that I ordered, still in a state of disbelief. Now don't get it twisted because I had been cheated on several times through out my life but I wasn't married then and the man I was with didn't cheat on me with another man. How in the hell could I compete with another man? I guess men, gay men felt the way women did and it was obvious another man must know what another man wants and needs; because I show in the hell don't know and if I wasn't such a secure Bitch I would be blaming myself! I didn't need to see him anytime soon or I will be sitting in Orleans Parish prison, being some woman's bitch! The rage went through me and had all my insides burning up! Shit I couldn't even call my friends to come and comfort me, this shit was too embarrassing. This man humiliated and hurt me so much and there was no way I would ever forgive him. I did know that by the end of the week I was going to have my lawyer file for divorce, if not sooner. I am going to take him for everything he’s worth! I should have known something was up with him though. What kind of man opens up a club with John Holmes? He always told me it was a business investment and it would be good for us financially. I never ever stepped foot inside that place it was cheesy if you asked me. Only cheaters and low classed people would go there. Kerry never admitted to me what kind of club it was but I had my own spies and they informed me about all the sex and cheating that went on in there! When Steven mentioned John’s name to me that should have sent up a red flag in my head, that man is a whore among whores. So arrogant and self absorbed that he wouldn’t even claim his own child! Still at least he was fucking women and not men! Anything would be better than what Kerry was doing. Or was he? I sat there and ordered a few more drinks at the bar before heading up to the room; I arranged for a two week stay, maybe longer. I was blasted but no one could tell me that and a few minutes after getting into my hotel room, I vomited all over the bathroom floor. I was never much of a drinker but in some insane way it helped me to forget the pain that had invaded my life a few hours earlier. I cleaned up the floor then got into the shower before snuggling up in that big soft bed. I would have to deal with this tomorrow, maybe. I woke the next morning with a hangover from hell. I knew that I over did it with the drinking but I wanted to numb my pain. I called down and ordered myself some breakfast; maybe some greasy bacon can help me absorb some of this alcohol. I looked at my cell phone which had been ringing non stop throughout the night; Steven must have lost the little mind he had left if he thought I would be talking to him anytime soon. He could call this number until his fingers fell off but the only person he was going to talk to was my lawyers. If I could take an eraser and erase him out of my life this minute I would but I knew it would not be that easy. I loved him and I was in love with him for the last eight years. I made him second in my life, God was first. I even placed him before me which was stupid now that I thought about it. It was too easy for him to talk to me and explain what was going on, no he had to let me find out in the worst way! Humiliated and scarred I now was but I was going to get through this and he was going to pay dearly. I went into the bathroom to wash my face and brush my teeth, decided to run a brush through my hair. I didn’t want to scare the room service person when they arrived to bring my food. Steven woke the next morning from what little sleep he was able to get. Kerry had not returned any of his calls and he could not help but worry whether or not he was alright. It had been a long time since Steven had that special someone there and even though Kerry was married he enjoyed the love they shared. A few of his friends never understood why he was allowing himself to fall in love with a married man. There were no easy answers; it’s just the way it was. They met one night at the club six months before; Steven was actually working as a bartender. One day they got to talking and found that they enjoyed each others company. Kerry didn’t see Steven as a gay man, he saw him as a person who always had time to listen to his problems. Steven was not the flamboyant type, so to the outside world they were just friends. Kerry found that he spent more and more time at the club just to be around Steven. Sometimes after work they would go somewhere to eat or just talk. Often Kerry would find himself thinking about their previous conversations and looking forward to their next. Steven picked up the phone and tried Kerry’s number again, still no answer. The night before was an unexpected event for the both of them, neither one was prepared for it! Steven had remained patient with Kerry and never felt the need to pressure him to get out of his marriage so that they could build a life together. Now that everything was out in the open, they could stop sneaking around. Steven loved Kerry and wanted him to come to his senses soon. No one has control over their feelings or who they fall I love with. Steven tried his best not to worry about Kerry and decided to start on some much need laundry. He was happy that today was his off day at the club; he would not be any good today anyway. He had also planned a small dinner party at his place for a few friends and Kerry; he wondered whether or not he should cancel. He had already made up the menu of toss salad and for the main course blackened tilapia with a crawfish sauce, served over a bed of steamed rice and mixed vegetables. For dessert he was making his aunt Helen’s famous bread pudding with a rum sauce. After dinner they would do what they always did, sit around and talk about the men! Steven’s loft was very large and he was constantly complimented on his décor, he sometimes lied that he was the decorator but he had a professional Interior decorator come in from “Divatized” and help him with his decorating. He had spent a fortune but in the end it was worth every penny and he had to admit every time he received a compliment it made him feel good. He offered peace and comfort in his home; his friends made it their own private get away whenever they needed to escape from their world. Kerry made it his second home, there was a closet just for his clothes, drawers just for him and in the bathroom he had his own separate quarters. They were a loving couple behind those doors and Steven wanted that for ever. He wanted Kerry forever!  


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Reviewed by Regis Auffray 10/6/2007
This man humiliated and hurt me so much...

No woman should ever be hurt. I guess you could say your story "draws me in." Thank you. Love and best wishes,


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