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How I Got My Fishing Buddy
By Steve Slinker
Saturday, October 06, 2007
Rated "G" by the Author.
Fishing on the Red River at night and met a strange fellow.
How I Got My Fishing Buddy
One nice spring evening I decide it would be a great night for a little R&R, in other words it was time to go fishing, night fishing to be exact. So I load up the old truck with poles, bait, lantern, food and drink, a couple of dogs and strap on my old pistol (for snakes and varmints, you know) and head off for the Red River, Texas side. Now let me tell you about fishing on the Red River west of I-35, there are no people, no sounds of civilization and best of all NO LIGHTS! You could almost be back in the old Indian days and sometimes, just sometimes I almost think I might see their ghosts or shadows or something when I am out there but that is another story. I arrive at one of my fishing spots, gather some wood in case I want a fire later, place my lantern on the pole (it keeps the snakes from coming to the light at night, a definite worry here), place my fishing chair (a converted wheel chair), hammer in the rod holders, bait up and cast out into the river and sit down and relax.
For some folks I know this sounds pretty boring, but they have never sat in the open at night, with a bright, clear, light-free night sky and really looked at the stars and the night. Let me tell you it is one of the most intense experiences a person can have, sort of lets you KNOW that God exists and He is in control. I could go on and on about the night sky of Texas but it would distract from the tale, I will say this though, I have seen booco meteors, comets, satellites, even the space station; the only thing that detracts from all this is every now and then some dang airplane has to interfere and wander into my space, enough said. Of course I see something, rarely I admit, but something I just cannot identify but I always shrug it off as some military thing I am better off not knowing about, you know… experimental aircraft and such. A couple of times I have seen these points of light that are really high up and small but bright and they MOVE! In seemingly intelligent fashion and they do cause me to wonder, a lot! As I have said, I really enjoy my nights fishing on the Red River bottoms, they are a joy.
Back to this night I mentioned, something very unusual happened, something really strange and this is what I want to share with you. One of those points of light appeared that night and did it's usual shenanigans but after about an our it parted from it's normal patterns, it began to grow larger, as if it was coming nearer to where I was at. Larger, nearer, growing… then I heard a kind of humming noise, almost a buzz when there it was, right over me and it was definitely not an aircraft I recognized; it wasn't one of those discs I have heard about but it was sort of a cross between a cigar shape and a triangle, rounded though, sort of; it is hard to describe. It hovered there for a couple of minutes then landed behind me up on a flat place in the pasture there. Of course the cattle ran from it but not me, I wasn't smart enough; why I wouldn't run from the devil hisself, a point of pride with me and my folks, none of us ever ran from anything but a twister.
Well now, by now I was really curious at to what was going to happen next when this doorway in the side of that thing opened and this creature (for lack of a better word) came out of it. It had six legs and four arms and man… you ain't never seen so many "fingers". I have to admit that about that time I began to get a little "nervy" and sort of pulled my pistol out and held it down by my side out of sight. Not that I am unfriendly or anything but it seemed to be time to prepare for what ever, good or bad. That creature began to come towards me and my ear started to itch, down deep inside, really bad and I though this one heck of a time for a bug to crawl down in my ear and distract me. The closer that critter came the deeper the itch went and the stronger it got until finally I had to try and scratch it, anything to lessen the itch. All of the sudden I heard this voice in my head, not in my ears but inside my head and let me tell you, I almost bolted like a yearling calf running from a wolf but my folks don't run, a point of pride, you see.
As fast as thought I pointed that pistol at that thing and told it to quit doing that and something on its chest (it had some sort of suit or armor on) flashed and I could not MOVE! Not a lick, shucks, I almost quit breathing. And this creature informed me that it was going to take me into it ship and use me as a guinea pig for some tests, now let me tell you, this was not what I wanted to hear, no way. I still had my pistol pointed at it and I tried hard to pull the trigger, couldn't, no matter how hard I tried to and this thing tells me it is no use to resist that I had no choice in the matter, yes sir it was reading my mind. Now let me tell you a thing like that is a real bother, I mean how can you tell a lie or have any privacy with something like that. I mean how about all those private thoughts you have about people you know and meet, it could cause some really bad problems.
I thought then my goose was cooked but I wasn't going to be no guinea pig if I could help it. So I thought back to it asking why it wanted me for experiments, that I would not be a good test subject. It wanted to know what I meant and I told it that I had head problems from my past life, what with my life being so violent and all, that I was sort of off my rocker socially. That I preferred to be alone, was aggressive with some people, in fact down right mean to most; I had had so many surgeries that I was missing body parts and other organs had been moved around or changed by the surgeons that had worked on me (I know I exaggerated just a little there), why I was even missing most of one leg and have had a kidney transplant. That if he needed someone to experiment on that he had better go look for someone more normal, maybe Hillary Clinton or Ted Kennedy or even Bin Laden. I know that was wrong of me but I had to TRY! Now this set it back on its haunches, figuratively, and I could see it thinking real hard sort of, hard to tell with it. Well sir, it finally says well if you are not a good test subject I have to learn something, decisions like this are not in my mission parameters, so I will take you anyhow. I really start to protest at this and said now wait a minute hoss, my life has been bad enough without you taking me apart for some dang experiment; about that time the bell on the tip of my pole rang and I tried to turn and grab the pole and couldn't, that damn thing still had me paralyzed and I told it in no uncertain terms to let me go that I had a fish to catch and to do it RIGHT NOW! Anybody who fishes for catfish understands how I felt right then, when that bell rings everything else becomes second to the catfish, even an alien.
Well to my surprise it let me go and I reeled in a really nice 17 pound channel cat, now let me tell you nothing is more enjoyable than a catch like that and all the while that thing is still in my head and experiences what I am feeling at that moment. After I put that cat on a stringer and back in the water the creature started asking me all kinds of questions about catfishing and the delight I took in it. So I proceeded to teach it about catfish and the skill necessary to catching them and all that goes with it, the campfire, coffee perked over it, the taste of fresh fried catfish over that fire, the feeling of satisfaction and well-being that comes over a man at moments like that. The upshot of it was we spent several days out there fishing and getting to know each other. Now I am quite a fisherman but I am nothing compared to something with four arms and booco fingers, let me tell you "natural fisherman" fails to describe the way that creature could fish, makes me downright ashamed of my poor ability but that is how life goes, someone or "something" is always better. By the end of my fishing trip I had made a convert, I mean he fell in love with catfishing as bad as anyone I could name. We parted friends and he let me go home, said no one would believe me anyhow, he is right.
Now when I go fishing and get camp set up within a couple hours he will show up, I call him Jake by the way, makes my throat hurt something bad to try and call him by his full name, and we might fish for a few hours together or even days depending on what each of has to do. Jake is the best fishing buddy I have ever had and I have taken to spending so much time with him my wife suspects me of having an affair, Ha! If she just knew! Turns out Jake is really a nice person and while talking and fishing he tells me about things he has seen that I can just barely imagine.
Only problem is someday he will have to go back where he come from and who will I fish with then?
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