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Alexandra Kathi

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Member Since: Jan, 2007

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Unrequited love the story of her life
By Alexandra Kathi
Monday, October 22, 2007

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she had been down this road before, and each time she lost abit of herself and wondered what she had done to deserve this life.

this time she wasnt making the same mistakes as before though, she wasnt handing her heart to anyone on a plate.

This is how it has always been but she hopes that it’s not how it’s always going to be. Ever since she could remember that is how it’s been. Sitting at home thinking about Adrian she wonders why it keeps happening to her. Every guy she has fallen in love with either had commitment issues or had someone else in their life that they were holding out for. Adrian isn’t the perfect guy infact there is a few things on the list of ideal man that he will never be unless it was God doing the makeover. But he makes her laugh, he is intellectually stimulating and most important he treats her like a true friend. She thinks back at how it all started…. They met at her favourite coffee house, Mocha; sitting at the same corner she did every Sunday afternoon with her laptop. As usual reading through some material that has been sent to her during the week, that she didn’t get the time to read because of her hectic schedule and responding to email. She hadn’t noticed him staring at her, he had been watching her for almost an hour. He watched as she read something on her laptop and laughed, his eyes caressed the curve of her neck as she threw her head back in laughter. Finally not able to restrain himself anymore he walked over to her booth. She looks up when he asked if he can join her, she doesn’t bother to check whether there were other tables free because she knows it usually gets crowded as she quickly says yes and gets back to her emails. He said something about how demanding her job must be for her to be working on Sunday afternoon. She looks at him and her mind she is going “I hope this guy doesn’t think me saying he could sit is permission to hit on me.” Adrian kept staring at her and talking; at first she had no clue what he was going on and on about, she was thinking “He is definitely nothing to write home about so he better not waste my time.” Then he said something about her being the most beautiful woman he had seen all year and she burst out laughing. It was the cheapest line she had ever heard and she told him. Two hours later they were still talking, he wasn’t the most appealing guy but he was funny and intelligent. They had talked about a lot of things; everything from ex’s to politics. She finally got up to leave and when he asked for her number it was easy. That night Adrian called her and they talked for almost an hour. And the next morning when she woke up there was a message on her cell phone, “I miss you, I miss you, I miss you. It’s been a year now, they are good friends, she now knows a lot more about him including the fact that he has a girlfriend and 2 year old baby. They see each other regularly for coffees, dinner and even to just sit at Mocha with the laptops on a Sunday afternoon. He is a very ambitious guy; all full of ideas and passion for his work. Adrian has told her several times she is the best friend he ever had, he loved the fact that he could talk to her about anything. But unknown to him every time he says that, he is driving a knife deeper into her heart. It’s now 6 months since that day when sitting across from him at dinner she realized she had lost her heart to cupid. She hasn’t told him yet because Adrian had already told her he was in love with someone else. Sitting at home thinking about Adrian, there is a battle in her mind; should she leave things as they are and hope that one day someone else will come along who will love her, or should she end this friendship. She feels it’s easier to stay, at least this way when she needs a shoulder to cry on there is someone who cares. Yes he does care for her that she knows for sure, she feels it whether he is next to her or not. He regularly calls to check on her during the week and lets her know when he is too busy to do the regular lunches or dinners. It’s not unrequited love after all. “Hey! Maybe this is an end of my unrequited love story, she thinks. Adrian might not love me romantically but he does love me as a friend.” The future looks brighter now, happier now as she embraces the friendship and she can feel all that assumed hurt ebb away from her leaving behind a quiet peace. Adrian was a good guy, a good friend and she would always love him to bits but no longer would it be confused with romantic longings. Oh! The joy, the freedom, she picks up the phone and calls him and as always he answers cheerfully “Hello gorgeous, how are you today? Was actually thinking about you?” she laughs “Do I want to know what you were thinking about?” she asks teasingly. “Get your mind out of the gutter Emma, I was wondering what you were up to and if you would want to go to Mocha for coffee and no laptops, I have something I need to talk to you about.” He announces “That’s Ok I feel like black forest cake anyway, a need to celebrate a mental breakthrough I just had”, she says. “Cool because am just around the corner from your house” says Adrian. Lucky for them Emma favourite corner booth at Mocha is open, and as they slump into the huge Moroccan cushions the waiter greets them happily “I was wondering what happened to the two of you, it’s been a while. Should I bring you the usual or will you be asking for something special?” Emma asks for her usual coffee and a slice of black forest cake and Adrian orders for the usual Ethiopian brew. As the wait for their order, Adrian moves shifts to face Emma and taking her hand announces “I need to talk to you about something, am scared shitless about how you will react, but I need to say this and I will want an honest answer from you.” Wondering why he is being so serious Emma assures him that she will always be there for him and will try her best to answer whatever question he is about to ask.” “Emma, remember how I told you I had feelings for Lindie and that she was coming over to visit. Well! She arrived two weeks ago and turns out we have both changed so much. It was like being with a total stranger.” “5 years apart can do that to a relationship but if you really care about someone you try and make it work” Emma says. “You see that’s just it, having Lindie around made me realize I didn’t care about her that way anymore, am in love with someone else and it didn’t hit me until we started having fights after 3 days of being together.” “Emma what I am trying to say, is that I think I am in love with you, and before you laugh at me, please listen to me. You are a wonderful person I have known that from the moment I met you and you have been a wonderful friend to me this past year, the best I have had. We get along perfect and I would want you to consider us dating, I love you Emma.” She didn’t say anything because words couldn’t even form in her mind. She just sat there tears streaming down her face. “Why are you crying Emma?” Adrian asked surprised. “Did I say something to upset you?” she shook her head. “Then what’s wrong? Please talk to me, don’t do this to me. If I have upset you in anyway I take that back but please stop crying” Emma summons up her voice just as the waiter is walking back with their order. “Adrian am not angry at you, am crying because I have loved you silently for the last 6 months. I didn’t say anything because I didn’t want to lose the friendship we have shared.” “Am crying because am really happy, I had convinced myself that I should be satisfied with just friendship and then you walk up to me with this,” at this she reaches out to hug him. The waiter is standing there with their order smiling, “I always knew this would happen someday, you are always together, always so happy.” He places the orders and turns to walk away. Adrian calls him back “Get us another slice black forest cake, we are celebrating.”  

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