Become a Fan
By Tori Barton
Saturday, December 15, 2007
Rated "PG13" by the Author.
I had no words for my friend as I hugged her. I just let her weep and rock back and forth in my arms.
We are all faced with changes throughout our lives. Sometimes we plan for these changes and call them goals and achievements. Other times these changes are quite unexpected. They can be referred to as surprises if we like the way the changes have affected our lives or tragedies if they impact us negatively. In any case, I have found that change in most cases regardless of its presentation is difficult.
I have been faced with quite a bit of change in my life recently. Some of these changes I have made in hopes of redirecting an already underway change in myself that I was not in control of and that was not having a positive effect on me or on those that love me. Other changes that I am being faced with started off as planned changes and evolved into far more complex changes, which now seem to be somewhat overwhelming to me. Additionally, I am faced with some changes to my family whereas that old saying "Ignorance is bliss" takes on a whole new meaning. But none, of the changes I am faced with personally come close to comparing to the change that I witnessed in a friend of mine today.
Personally speaking, I have felt overwhelmed and admittedly depressed over the daunting task of dealing with the brimming emotions having filled my heart and soul over the past several years. Feelings and emotions that went undealt with. Kept in a special place to be pondered over, toyed with, and lavished in at will, but never broken down, organized and filed away in an appropriate manner. Recently that cup runneth over and I decided, reluctantly and with some help that it was time to lock the door on the lodge.
I've also been working on some physical self-improvement changes, and as part of this plan, I was to undergo a much needed yet relatively simple surgical procedure. Upon preoperative testing it was discovered that a slightly more extensive procedure than what we originally planned for was needed and this change has me somewhat worried and slightly out of sorts. Thankfully, I have my friends and family to lean on for support during this adjustment period and extended recovery.
Additionally my family has recently been faced with the disappointment of finding out that yet another one of my siblings has been haunted for years with drug addiction. Quite frankly this comes as no surprise to me, but was a horrific shock to my parents who now understand that at least 50% of their children are drug addicts and has now become a huge disruption to their lives as they rushed in to perform their duties as the be all and end all of this nonsense. Much to their disappointment, this 20 year addiction cannot be "fixed" in 7 days.
But as I said… NONE of the changes I have faced in my life have been as difficult to deal with as I once thought they were. Today, I watched my friend be delivered the news that her daughter and two grandchildren had been murdered by her daughters ex-husband who then shot himself. Two detectives from the Tampa Police Department came to our office today to deliver this news. That at 6:42 this morning, just 10 minutes before she drove by her daughter's apartment, a report of gunshots had been reported, and this was the result. A young woman of only twenty-seven, along with her room-mate and two innocent babies of only two and four years were taken from this world by a selfish bastard who was pissed off because he couldn't have things his way and then cowardly took his own life rather than face the wrath of his own destruction.
I had no words for my friend as I hugged her. I just let her weep and rock back and forth in my arms. My friend's life revolved around her daughter and her grandchildren. She had no other family here. In fact, she had spent her entire Thanksgiving holiday sitting at her dying mothers bedside in Kentucky. Her only words to me at that moment were "Go home and hug your family."
No matter what changes or challenges you are facing, remember that those who love you are there for you. Hug them, kiss them, tell them that you love them. Lean on your friends and allow them to do the same. NO ONE PROMISES A TOMORROW! Live for today, Have no regrets. Live life to its fullest, Love deeply and Laugh often.
I LOVE YOU ALL!!!!!
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