“Heather I am so glad to see you smiling and laughing again, enjoying life.” Becka said, as I sat in Becka’s family room watching reruns of Reba, it was good to find good wholesome shows on the television and when this came on I thought I would watch it.
“It’s good to be laughing again, realizing that my life is not over, changed yes, but change is what you make it. I have a lot of life left in me and I plan on living it.”
“That’s the Heather I knew before the accident.” My best friend said. “I was really beginning to wonder if I would ever see that joyful, boisterous person I called the Sister of my Heart.”
“I’m back.” I said laughing. “How about we go to town, I think I need to get out and get some new clothes, and I certainly know I need to get some things before the wedding. I can’t believe in just over a week I am going to be married.”
“Are you nervous?”
“A little, but more excited than anything. I just can’t believe how blessed I am, and how I was overlooking those blessings, blinded by my grief.”
“You were dealing with a lot, but I missed the old Heather, my best friend, my sister, I was so used to seeing you strong, that it hurt me to see you weak.”
“We’re all weak without Jesus.”
“Amen to that Heather.”
“Are you sure you are ready to go to town, you haven’t really been going out to much since you got home.”
“I got to start somewhere.”
“True, and I know you must be going stir crazy sitting around the house all day.”
“That’s putting it mildly.”
Becka’s laughter was like music. We were both getting past what happened, I was the one who took the life changing bullet, but it could have easily been her. The innocence thief did not really care who he was hurting, he was just out to yield the power he felt he had. I was not about to let this man do anymore damage than he had already done.
“We’ll have to be careful, he may still be out looking to hurt you. Hurt us.” Becka said.
“I know, and I will be careful, but if we let him feel as if he has to much power then he will think he’s going to win, and I don’t want to give that monster that kind of power trip.”
“Me either, but I don’t want to face another bullet, one that we might not survive this time.”
“Believe me I don’t want that either.”
“I know you don’t, but let’s just enjoy ourselves, it has been a long time, since we have been able to just have fun, and before long you are going to be a married woman, you’ll be to busy to hang out with me.”
“That’s not going to happen Becka, you will always be like a sister to me and I will always make sure we are able to spend some time together.”
Just getting up and going was something of the past, I was not able to just decided to go and go, no more than I could just jump out of bed, and get ready, it took time, but in a way maybe that was a good thing, because I had spent so much time flying through life, trying to get the most done with each day, that I forgot to take the time just to be. I was able to have a life though, that didn’t change, and I was going to live each day to its fullest.
Lord thank you for helping me snap out of that pit of despair I had fallen into, and for letting me see the joys in life once again, I know I am blessed to be for such a time as this, and I need to remember that when I really stat feeling down, when I start feeling as if my world was turned upside down, and I need to realize that although you aren’t the one who causes the bad things in our life, you can use them for your glory.“Ready?” Becka asked, as she headed to the door, with her purse in the hand.
“Ready, but please drive my car, I don’t trust your’s.”
“I know I need to get a new one, where have I heard that before/” Becka asked laughing.
“I wouldn’t know.” I teased back.
I was glad for the laughter Becka and I were sharing, glad that I was able to enjoy life again. Having the Lord in my heart was making a difference, I had been a born again believer for years, but after the accident for a few weeks I was questioning what I believed, and now I realized that was just stupid. God hadn’t abandoned me I was the one abandoning him, and I needed to get right with the good Lord again, I needed Jesus’ presence in my life and I needed to stop feeling as if I had to “fix everything” myself. This was one thing I couldn’t fix and now I realized that, and maybe that was a lesson I needed.