Become a Fan
Reality TV Hell
By Caleb B Wygal
Tuesday, June 24, 2008
Rated "PG" by the Author.
A short story about a young couple being on a reality television program, and everything going dreadfully wrong.
“I hate this place, Blake,” Katie shouted over the kitchen counter as she threw some burnt eggs into the trashcan, fresh from a dollar store bought skillet.
“Well, what do you want me to do about it?” Blake said in a southern drawl, throwing his hands up in disgust. “I work my tail off down at the shop, working on cars, six days a week. All your lazy butt does is sit here, sip wine coolers, and scarf down Twinkies all day. If you got off the couch, got a job, and helped out around here, we could afford to have a better place.”
Blake and Katie Blackwelder have been married for five years. The first couple of years were bliss. She was an honors student in college, cruising towards a degree in Business. Blake took auto body courses for a year in high school, then another year after he graduated to get his certification. He made a decent salary working at a local car dealership.
Years later, Blake had the same job. Katie never finished school, and Blake promised her that they could live off his salary. The small home that they bought needed repair. Blake could afford to pay the bills and food, but not much else. Minor repairs went undone. Their once nice home now looked like a disaster.
Katie had a plan for that however. Since she sat at home and watched television all day, she became hooked on the home improvement channel. Her plan did not involve the tips and tricks that she learned. No, her plan involved her putting in requests to all of these shows to come, and do a makeover on their home.
She never told Blake her plan. Until now.
She put both hands on the dirty kitchen counter, and stared across the gap separating the two of them. “Listen,” she said, “I’m still trying to figure out what I’m going to do.” This drew a snort of disgust from Blake. She went on , and laid out her plan.
After she explained, Blake simply stared. Then he started to laugh.
“What are laughing for? I’m being serious!”
“Yeah, sure.“ He pointed towards their front door. “Like someone’s going to come, and remodel our home. That’s the craziest thing I’ve ever heard Katie.”
Katie opened her mouth to speak, when at that moment, the doorbell rang.
Katie gave Blake a look that said, ‘I told you so,’ and marched to the door. Blake followed. He was as surprised as Katie. He thought that there was absolutely no way that there would be a camera crew outside.
Katie wrapped her hand around the doorknob, gave a sarcastic look at Blake and opened it.
“Good morning Blackwelder family!” A man with spiky hair, and a goatee screamed as Katie opened the door. Behind the man, in the Blackwelder’s front yard, were three cameramen, and several other people with clipboards and headsets.
To Blake’s astonishment, Katie wrapped the strange man in a hug, thanking him profusely.
“Congratulations Katie and Blake, your home has been selected as the next home for the Insane Home Makeover television program!”
“I knew it!“ Katie screamed as she turned and kissed Blake. “I knew that they’d come!”
The host looked at Blake for a reaction. All that the normally stoic Blake could come up with was, “Wow!”
The host explained that a plan was in place based upon Katie’s proposal. They were going to put the young couple in a suite at the nicest hotel in town for three days. It was Katie’s dream come true .
On day one, the Blackwelders were sent a video showing a construction crew demolishing their home from inside and out. Blake and Katie were saddened by what they saw, but knew that they were going to come home to a beautiful home.
On day two, before the reconstruction could begin on the home, the host got a call from his producer in New York. The show had been canceled, and funding had been pulled. They were to immediately return to New York. They did not even bother to tell the Blackwelders that the show was canceled.
The Blackwelders returned home on the third day to find their home in ruins.
They stood in the driveway, staring at the wreckage. Katie was afraid Blake would hate her forever. She wrapped her arms around him. “I don’t know what happened sweetie. I’m sorry.”
Blake shook his head, “It’s time for you to get a job.”
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