AuthorsDen.com   Join Free! | Login    
   Popular! Books, Stories, Articles, Poetry
Where Authors and Readers come together!

SIGNED BOOKS    AUTHORS    eBOOKS new!     BOOKS    STORIES    ARTICLES    POETRY    BLOGS    NEWS    EVENTS    VIDEOS    GOLD    SUCCESS    TESTIMONIALS

Featured Authors:  Ken Brosky, iMichael Charles Messineo, iFrancis Eaden, iArmineh Ohanian, iStephen Cafaro, iG. Roscoe, iGracie McKeever, i

  Home > Humor > Stories
Popular: Books, Stories, Articles, Poetry     

J C Howard

· + Follow Me
· Contact Me
· Poetry
· News
· Stories
· Blog
· 30 Titles
· 260 Reviews
· Save to My Library
· Share with Friends!
·
Member Since: Mar, 2011

J C Howard, click here to update your pages on AuthorsDen.




Featured Book
The Street Life Series: Is Rags or Riches?
by Kevin Weeks

For those determined to succeed despite the odds, is it rags or riches?..  
BookAds by Silver
Gold and Platinum Members


Pennies or Pounds
By J C Howard
Saturday, May 14, 2011

Rated "G" by the Author.

Share    Print  Save   Follow

Recent stories by J C Howard
· Freedom Is Never Free
· Love Everlasting
· Father's favorite excerpts
· From Father to Son
· Babble
· The Grade
· Tribute to Innocence in the Wild
           >> View all 29


This is not a statement about our current education system. It's simply an observation of our current standards.

"I'll take a small chocolate cone please."
 
The young face looked puzzled. "We only have medium and large, mamn."
 
I tip my head slightly and let my lips bow into a gentle smile asking, "Which is smaller?"
 
"The medium is small," she said as her brow furrows, not quite understanding the question.
 
"Then give me the small," I said, thinking how clever I was.
 
Without hesitation, she repeated, "We only have medium and large, mamn."
 
I paused. But, my desire for a chocolate cone overcame me and I... "blinked" first. "That's fine, make mine a medium."
 
Not realizing she had won, she turns to the register, punches a button and pleasantly says, "That's $1.87 mamn."
 
I search in my purse, wanting to lighten my load a bit, I find a nickle and seven pennies. I smile, give her the change, then add two one dollar bills.
 
With a most sincere look, she says, "That's too much mamn," handing me back my change but clutching tightly to the dollars.

She punches the keys on the register as I respond,  "I just want a quarter back, please."

"Mamn, your change is .13 cents." She squints repulsively, thinking I am trying to cheat her.
 
I add her dime and three pennies to my already burdensome collection of change, then wrapping my tongue around the smooth chocolate, I think...whether it's pennies or pounds... there's always a cost.

 

 

 

 

 

 


Want to review or comment on this short story?
Click here to login!


Need a FREE Reader Membership?
Click here for your Membership!


Reviewed by Laurel Lamperd 7/28/2011
Yes, well your brush with the cashier was interesting. The cash register does everything down to the amount of change to return to the customer. Magic machines which Commerce would collapse without. Laurel
Reviewed by Eileen Granfors 5/26/2011
We have family stories about these cashier moments too. Well told! And frightening. I computed a purchase discount in my head and the clerk asked "How'd you do that?" I told her it was magic. I think she believed me.
Reviewed by Robert Cosmar 5/17/2011
I agree with CJ, this is wonderful -- and way too funny. Hard to believe there are people as dumb as this.
Bob
Reviewed by CJ Heck 5/15/2011
(Clapping) This is wonderful, JC! I've had cashiers with the same ... er, superior intelligence as this one (laughing). Very well done -- flash-fiction at its best!
Hugs,
CJ

Popular Humor Stories
1. Better Late Than Never. ...
2. Top 10 Things to Avoid Doing…Now and Forev
3. Nude-Night-Naughty 6
4. She Told Me To Do It
5. A Man and His Dog
6. Ireland: It's a wee bit of Heaven, and th
7. A Reluctant Father Christmas
8. Celestine, the cat who helped Galileo...
9. Shoes
10. The Elephant

Jeremy's Little Book of Stalker Greetings Card Messages by Mark Sutton

For all of you stalkers living in this modern day and age, it can be difficult finding the time to sit down and compose greetings messages for the object/s of your desire/s. You ne..  
BookAds by Silver, Gold and Platinum Members

Shakespeare: Slammed, Smeared, Savaged and Slaughtered by Jay Dubya

Shakespeare: Slammed, Smeared, Savaged and Slaughtered (Part I) is adult literature featuring adult content and language...  
BookAds by Silver, Gold and Platinum Members

Authors alphabetically: A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z

Featured Authors | New to AuthorsDen? | Add AuthorsDen to your Site
Share AD with your friends | Need Help? | About us


Problem with this page?   Report it to AuthorsDen
© AuthorsDen, Inc. All rights reserved.