Before The Accident that changed my life forever, my attitude was this: "It won't EVER happen to ME!"
I couldn't have been more wrong.
I now lie here in a hospital bed, waiting for the go-ahead, for the ambulance attendants to put me on a gurney and roll me out to the ambulance; the ambulance, in kind, will take me to the rehabilation hospital up the way, where I will then start physical therapy, in the hopes that one day (hopefully soon!) that I will walk again.
I am paralyzed. Paralyzed from the waist down. I have very little feeling in my hips and absolutely no feeling whatsoever in my legs or feet. It's like my body ended right at my hips, but I know my body is still there, 'cause when I look down, I see my legs lying limply on the bed, like a pair of pale sausages.
I became paralyzed last month when I fell off of my horse, "Ginger". Something sppked her, and she bucked, throwing me off in the process. When I landed, I landed wrong; I knew I'd done something to my back. There was this soft, audible "Poing!" noise, sort of like what you hear on cartoons, incredible pain, and then ... nothing. When I tried to roll over, so I could get up, I couldn't. I just lay there on the ground, unable to move.
I suddenly became very scared. I started screaming hysterically for my mama to come help (daddy was at work at the time); mama came out, and I told her to call for an ambulance as I was hurt badly. I told her I couldn't move or get up.
It seemed like hours, but the ambulance (and the EMT's) were there within minutes. They soon had me on a gurney and after strapping me in place (so I wouldn't fall off), they put me into the rear of the ambulance, shut the doors, and soon I was being rushed to the nearest hospital.
In the ER, I was looked over. Doctors asked me a thousand questions as nurses took my vital signs and samples from my body. I still couldn't move (or feel) anything below my hips/waist. I was becoming more scared as the minutes ticked by. I had no idea what I'd done to myself, but I knew it was bad.
I just didn't know HOW bad.
Then I got the news that I would need to be in a wheelchair for the rest of my life. The news nearly crushed me. I wanted nothing more than to die, so I wouldn't have to put up with the misery any longer. I didn't want to be in a wheelchair: I wanted to walk again, but right now, that was impossible.
Now I'm getting ready to go to the rehab hospital, where I will have extensive physical, emotional/mental, and occupational therapies. I will learn how to do things sitting down in a wheelchair, transferring myself from a bed or chair to and from my wheelchair, reaching for things, and whatnot. I will learn how to dress myself sitting down and how to do my shoes/pants.
It won't be easy, but I'm learning that my life is not over, by a long shot. It's just going to take a lot of getting used to and I just wonder what my friends are going to do upon seeing me after I get out of the rehab hospital.
~To be continued.~