I was home now, home.
Staring at the spot of blood on the floor in my “writing cave” where I had been shot.
Hoping, praying the blood would give me answers.
Sheila had brought me home from the hospital, when I had been discharged earlier that day. I would have to relearn to drive, relearn to drive, without the use of my legs.
It was all starting to hit now.
I couldn’t walk.
I may never walk again.
The pill was hard to swallow, but it was one I was going to have to swallow. I was going to have to face the reality.
“Myra are you okay?” Sheila asked.
“I honestly don’t know.” I admitted to my best friend. There would be no use trying to lie to her, she would read through that like one of my novels.
“Your strong Myra, and you have faith, and friends who care. Don’t forget that.”
“I know Sheila, I am just wanting answers. I want to be able to tell them something, anything that will be able t help the cops catch this monster.”
“I know you did Myra, but I don’t think staring at that blood stain any longer is going to do anything, but take you back to a time you don’t want to be at now.”
“Sheila in some ways I think I will always go back to that night, I will certainly always live with what happened that night.”
“I know you will Myra.”
I was grateful for Sheila, for what she was doing for me. For her love and support. I knew that without my best friend I would not get through this. The Lord had placed Sheila into my life for a reason. I needed a best friend like Sheila.
She encouraged me not to give up in her own way.
I was going to need that, I knew that, I understood that.
I was going to need to be pushed from time to time, because I knew that there would be times I would not want to fight so much. I was going to need to fight to get stronger. I was home now, but I still had a long way to go. Getting stronger, going through physical therapy, rebuilding my life, it was going to take work. A lot of hard work, and though I was not afraid of hard work I knew their would be times when I would need Sheila’s support. She would push me when I could not push myself any longer.
Lord thank you for letting me have a friend like Sheila. I am going to need her throughout this, but more than that I am going to need you.I was grateful for my faith, because I knew without that I would not make it through this. My faith was anchor it was what kept me grounded. I would not be able to do anything without the faith that carried me this far. I would have wanted to give up long ago.
Facing paralysis was not something I would want to face along. Facing the fact that I was now a paraplegic. Even now the words sounded foreign to my lips, but I understood what it meant. I wasn’t sure what all it would implicate though, because I was just facing this reality.
A reality that wasn’t easy, but it was mine.
I could not pretend this away.
The reality was that I was in a chair, that I could no longer walk, because someone had shot me.
But why? Who?
Would I ever have the answers I sought? Would I ever remember anything that would lead the cops to whoever did this?
One thing was certain Sheila was right, staring at the blood stain was not going to give me the answers I thought. If anything it was only going to serve to drive me mad. I had to figure out another way. I had to remember something.
To get my mind off of what I could not remember I turned my Bible to Colossians 2:
1 I want you to know how hard I am contending for you and for those at Laodicea, and for all who have not met me personally. 2 My goal is that they may be encouraged in heart and united in love, so that they may have the full riches of complete understanding, in order that they may know the mystery of God, namely, Christ, 3 in whom are hidden all the treasures of wisdom and knowledge. 4 I tell you this so that no one may deceive you by fine-sounding arguments. 5 For though I am absent from you in body, I am present with you in spirit and delight to see how disciplined you are and how firm your faith in Christ is.
Spiritual Fullness in Christ
6 So then, just as you received Christ Jesus as Lord, continue to live your lives in him, 7 rooted and built up in him, strengthened in the faith as you were taught, and overflowing with thankfulness.
8 See to it that no one takes you captive through hollow and deceptive philosophy, which depends on human tradition and the elemental spiritual forces[