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Karen Lynn Vidra, The Texas Tornado

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Choir Practice. (Part Three)
By Karen Lynn Vidra, The Texas Tornado
Thursday, December 01, 2011

Rated "G" by the Author.

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An obese woman is still judged for her looks by the other members of the choir she is a part of.

Image of church choir (and director) (c) 2010, by Karla Dorman.

A year has gone by since I last wrote, and I'm afraid things haven't changed all that much.  In fact, things have seemed to have gotten worse ...

I know the other members of the choir say they are my friends, but are they REALLY??  I mean, I still see them looking at me with their eyes, and, believe me, the looks aren't ones of admiration or love: if anything, they are disgusted by the very sight of me.  I am sorry; I didn't ask to be fat!!

They say they like me, but I don't konw.  I notice I never get invited to church functions or have any of the other ladies call me to check up on me or ask me if I need anything.  It is getting to be a chore; I think after this Cantata year, I just might drop out of the church choir altogether.

I don't have any problems with Jessie, the leader.  She's as fearless (and as dedicated) as ever.  She is also very sweet and is always trying to encourage me.  I really appreciate that.  If it were not for Jessie, I wouldn't even BE in this stupid Cantata that's coming up!!

I don't have any problems with the music.  I know my solo part perfectly.  I could sing it backwards as well as frontways.  I am singing the solo part in our musical, which is called "The Gift".  I am singing the solo part in "O Bless The Lord".  It's just that whenever I am singing, I see the other choir ladies staring at me with jealousy and contempt (or is it HATE??) in their eyes because I got picked to do the solo and they didn't.

Jessie keeps telling me not to worry about what the other girls think, but I know better.  I know she is as worried about them as I am, if not more so.  After all, this IS Christmas: Christmas should be all about loving your fellow man, not being jealous or hating them!!  

I sincerely hope that after tonight's practice, Jessie will give them a good talking-to.  I hate being judged like this because I am so big!!  (I have tried just about every diet on the plenet; for a while they work and I lose the weight, but then something happens, and I get depressed and I start eating again, and it's just become a vicious cycle!)  I have had it with their judging me or treating me like a pariah or seeing them laughing with their eyes or pointing at me every time my back is turned!!

Well, I have to go.  I am going to try to concentrate on my song and not let the fact that I am hated by the choir bother me (yet it does! It truly, really DOES!!).  Pray for me; I could really use God's help about now!!

~To be continued.~ 

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Reviewed by Michelle Kidwell Power In The Pen 12/6/2011
Its sad when we judge solely on how someone looks, we are truly missing out on the person inside...What if Anne Sullivan Macy judged Helen Keller solely on what she saw on the outside?
In Christs love
Reviewed by Karla Dorman, The StormSpinner 12/1/2011
Sadness in these lines, Karen ... well done.

(((HUGS))) and love, Karla.
Reviewed by Paul Berube 12/1/2011
Very nicely done, Karen. God bless.

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