Against All Odd’s
I am new to this blogging thing, but I am here to tell my story, so here it goes. I came from Afghanistan seven years ago, a scared abused little girl. For days even weeks I would spend hours huddled in the corner of a room, afraid of everyone, everything. I did not know that I could trust anyone the people who were supposed to protect me had never done that, they had hurt me. My own Father brutally raped me from the time I was three. No wonder I could not cry tears for him, and I came pregnant when I was nine, pregnant from being raped, this time not from my Father, but from some of his friends as he watched. I gave birth a few months before I turned ten, to a healthy little girl, but my Father made sure she was gone. I thought for years he had killed her, but later I would find out differently. I have not gotten that far yet, so I will get to that in a later entry.
When the Baxter Family adopted me I was a scared little girl, who had endured a type of Hell that made me older than my years. I did not know that I could trust, and I hid. Mom, Dad and Hope were gentle, they shared their faith with me at first but because my Father had been Jihadist I pegged all religions as the same. I would soon see that my Father was a monster who used Islam as a tool to manipulate and abuse. The Baxter’s were Christians who proclaimed Jesus was a loving Lord who wanted better for his children, but at first I could not believe. I was afraid to believe, but my parents, my new parents they were patient with me.
I was terrified, too afraid even to tell them when I was sick from an infection that cost me my leg. That could have been the final straw but instead after I broke down I grew stronger. I listened to what my family was saying, and I saw the life they were leaving, and I realize the loss of my leg did not have to be the end, that if I had survived the hellish abuse I could survive anything with God’s grace, and I was going to do just that. I was going to show the world I could survive and I did survive. I thrived. I overcame the culture shock, the abuse I had experienced in my home country, and I realized I was safe. I saw what a true family was for the first time in my life. I was cared about. I was love, and for the first time in my life I began letting go, and not being so afraid. I discovered I did not have to be perfect all the time because I served a perfect Father and for that I was grateful.
Ultimately it was Hope that led me to the Lord, because Hope was the first one I could reach out to. Once I opened up to Star, I started opening up to my Mother, and eventually I learned I did not have to fear Mr. Baxter, my Daddy. A Daddy who cared about me, not a Father who beat me who raped me, did horrible things.
I will be given a new body in eternity, if I rejected Christ and died, I would not be with him for eternity, and I did not want to risk that.