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Lonnie Hicks

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Books by Lonnie Hicks
Fractured Idioms July 30
By Lonnie Hicks
Posted: Monday, July 30, 2012
Last edited: Tuesday, July 31, 2012
This short story is rated "G" by the Author.
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           >> View all 433
They made me do it.

smart ass
Refers to the mistaken believe that derrières have high IQ's

stick up

The use of a stick in robbery where the robbie thinks the stick is a  gun
a man of means
When, for some men, a single mean is not enough

have stick in craw

Cray fish nightmare
the chosen few
Dental extraction negotiations
gallivant around
Don Quixote

ready, willing, and able
School boy motto
neither rhyme nor reason
Bad poetry

in season
School boys dream for every girl he meets

Let's call it a day
Ancient Viking phrase for week

a ghost of a chance
When ghosts gamble they usually lose hence…

knock out of
Ancient Viking Truth Serum

Money is power
and the reverse

on the face of the earth
Begins with the last person… A date gone bad
get the chop
The prize in the pork chop tossing contest
pull hair out
Living with teenagers and the number one cause of baldness among women
cram for an examination
A day at the office for a proctologist

be right with you
Retail lies

play cat and mouse
followed by a game of Mouse RIP

little bitty
kitty committee --what were you thinking of?
as quick as a flash
Exiting just before the lunch bill comes

lift a finger
Obscure Olylmpic weightlifting contest 

get a jump on
Granny double dutch

more the merrier
Famous last words when the roommate wants to come along on the date

reach out to
Where the hand can be shaken or the face slapped.

bat an eye
batting eyes is gruesome and illegal in most states and cannot be used as subsititue for baseballs in baseball games.
wipe up the floor with you
Parental expression of affection

know better

Parental expression of rebuke usually followed by a punishment
to coin a phrase
Actually phrases are writtern not coined

hold out

Mom picking up teenage boys socks
arms extended

have a sweet tooth
Molar-canine romance

rest assured
Those who insist that they be buried with a large life insurance check

the fruit of loins
Can’t touch this

trial balloon
when some jurors insist on bringing their own party ballons to the trial

slam into
When a face visciously attacks a knuckle

send to the showers
Where many teen-aged boys need to go

an arm and a leg
Rental costs,

land on feet
Cats think this is a false belief perpetuated by dogs

tell it to the marines
Marine psychologists

expatiate on
Sounds dirty doesn’t it?

get into a mess
Sounds dirty doesn’t it

bright and early
No one in the morning is both

lie out
the opposite of "lying in" which occurs in bedrooms late at night.

pony up

Gambling with live ponies

quickened pulse
Appears in romance novels at lesst 5,000 times
pin hopes on
A painful remedy for depression
put roots down
When roots in dyed hair are insulted by others

on principle
What people say when the really want your money

set in motion

The loser in the slam-down

in glowing terms

Glow in the dark water from Fracking

the toast of the town
When you are part of a cannibal breakfast celebration

the bottom fell out
Happens right after 40
filthy rich
When wealthy people refuse to bathe

let fly
Flies who sub-let

in a big way
An unexprected pregnancy

get ducks in a row
Duck nanny in the park

rule the roost
Chicken King

I could eat a horse!
The horses are really upset over this.

cut wolf loose
An unwise act without a pair of Jordans o
r wings

crick in back
When baby crickets attack

go into a nosedive
Tiny kamikaze pilots and big noses.

follow ones nose
A bad GPS device
if worst comes to worst
Then you are super-bad-and  you can fly.

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Reader Reviews for "Fractured Idioms July 30"

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Reviewed by Jansen Estrup
Clever twists. Enjoyed them.

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