Seems that the older I get the harder it is to find what Christmas really means anymore.
I'm not nearly as happy about Christmas as I was when I was a child. If anything, just the thought of Christmas puts me in a bad mood.
Trying to find the perfect present is next to impossible at times, especially when it comes to my children and my husband. My children and husband have gotten so picky and it's all I can do to keep from wanting to throw some fruitcake at them.
I also can't stand the commercialism or the fact that people no longer care for their fellow man. If anything, it's everything for themself and to heck with the other person. People have gotten so grinchy and greedy it's appalling!
I think I will skip Christmas altogether this year. I haven't even put the tree or the lights up and don't think I will either. I'll just stay in bed and wait for Christmas to be overwith and done.
Doesn't help that our daughter has been gone for a year now. She was only 13; she died last year around this time, so Christmas only means sadness for me. Mikkayla died in a car accident while coming home from church with some friends; a drunk driver had hit them. She and her friend were both killed and her friend's family members were all critically injured. It was a nasty accident, one that didn't have to happen.
I have had anger and bitterness to the young man who killed my daughter ever since. Because of his irresponsible actions, I no longer have my daughter and Christmas only reminds me of what I have lost. So if you excuse me, I plan on cancelling Christmas this year. I have had it with Christmas!!
~To be continued!~