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Randy Stensaas

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Member Since: Nov, 2009

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Second Time Around Humor and Wisdom
by Randy Stensaas   

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Books by Randy Stensaas
· A Horse called H-Bomb
· Max and Me Life in the Boondocks
                >> View all

Category: 

Humor

ISBN-10:  1449965512 Type: 
Pages: 

140

Copyright:  Nov 27, 2009 ISBN-13:  9781449965518
Fiction

A collection of bits of wisdom collected over the years. They range from short short stories of humor, to one line saying

Amazon


A collection of interesting sayings and humorous stories that I have collected over the last ten plus years.  We all hear little bits of wisdom or they have been passed down to us from our elders.

We have all heard a funny story or something funny that has happened to a co-worker but by the end of the day we forget them.  I have collected them and wrote them down.

I hope you find them humorous, insirational and just plain silly. Please enjoy and share with friends, family and colleagues.


Excerpt

Gardening Rule: When weeding, the best way to make sure you are removing a weed and not a valuable plant is to pull on it. If it comes out of the ground easily, it is a valuable plant.

The easiest way to find something lost around the house is to buy a replacement.

Never take life seriously. Nobody gets out alive anyway.

There are two kinds of pedestrians: the quick and the dead.

Life is sexually transmitted.

An unbreakable toy is useful for breaking other toys.

If quitters never win, and winners never quit, then who is the fool who said, "Quit while you're ahead?"

Health is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die.


If you are an average American, in your whole life, you will spend an average of 6 months waiting at red lights.

It's impossible to sneeze with your eyes open.

Leonardo Da Vinci invented the scissors.

Maine is the only state whose name is just one
syllable.

No word in the English language rhymes with month, orange, silver, or purple.

On a Canadian two dollar bill, the flag flying over the Parliament building is an American flag.

Our eyes are always the same size from birth, but our nose and ears never stop growing.

Peanuts are one of the ingredients of dynamite.

Rubber bands last longer when refrigerated.

"Stewardesses" is the longest word typed with only the left hand and "lollipop" with your right.

The average person's left hand does 56% of the typing.




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Reader Reviews for "Second Time Around Humor and Wisdom"

Reviewed by D. Kelly 1/7/2010
Okay! You're putting them out there. Keep on writing. Love your Max and Me stories.



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