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A.J. Mahari

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Member Since: Feb, 2008

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Books
· Punishment and Revenge in Borderline Personality Disorder

· Full Circle - Lessons For Non Borderlines - Understanding BPD Relationships

· Understanding Borderline Personality Disorder - The Lost Self

· The Dilemma on the Other Side of Borderline Personality Disorder

· The Shadows and Echoes of Self - The False Self In Borderline Personality

· The Legacy of Abandonment In Borderline Personality Disorder


Articles
· Nobody Said Good-bye - Closure as an adult child of a borderline parent

· Three Choices

· Shelter of Storms

· Just Being There Is The Power of Now

· Loneliness - It is Pervasive, Powerful, and Purposeful

· The Application of Philosophy To Adaptation, Change, and Goal Achievement

· Diary - My Borderline Years

· Enlightenment Begins With The Serendipity of Paradox

· Finding Hope From The Polarized Reality Of BPD

· Inside My Asperger Experience

A.J. Mahari, click here to update your web pages on AuthorsDen.
Books by A.J. Mahari

Category: 

Psychology

Publisher:  Phoenix Rising Publications
Pages: 

116

Copyright:  April 2006


Phoenix Rising Publications
Phoenix Rising Publications

The Other Side of Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) - Mindfulness and Radical Acceptance for Family Members and Loved Ones of those with BPD - Non Borderlines

This ebook, is 116 pages of insightful must read information that will help Non-Borderlines free themselves emotionally from the chaotic and painful rollercoaster ride of loving (or having loved) someone with Borderline Personality Disorder.


The Other Side of Borderline Personality Disorder ebook consists of eight chapters that will enhance the journey of anyone who has (or has had) a borderline in his/her life. A.J. writes insightfully about how Non-Borderlines can free themselves from the chaotic painful drama of the borderline in their lives through the practice of Mindfulness and Radical Acceptance.

When a non-borderline is lost in the tumultuous world of a borderline it can cause untold pain and suffering. A.J. outlines 3 reasons why non-borderlines often remain hooked into the borderline's drama. A.J. also outlines the 3 main roadblocks to the practice of Radical Acceptance for Non-Borderlines as well as describing what keeps non-borderlines trapped in their own pain and suffering.

Those in a relationship (friend, family member, significant other, ex-partner) with someone with BPD, as well as any professional treating someone with BPD will benefit from the insight A.J. Mahari shares based upon her own recovery from BPD and experience as a non-borderline with her borderline father.


Excerpt
On the other side of Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) exists the family members, children, adult-children, spouses or significant others, and the parents of those with BPD. The suffering, chaos, and turmoil that this personality disorder causes for those diagnosed with it(borderlines) subsequently proliferates to all who are in any way connected with someone with BPD.

Also often affected in profound ways by those with BPD are the professionals who treat them.

Anyone can be a non-borderline whether they have BPD or not. If a person diagnosed with BPD is in a relationship with, has a parent, or child with BPD, when they are on the receiving end of borderline behaviour they are for all intents and purposes then in the non-borderline role unless and until they themselves relate in any distorted or regressed borderline ways in response themselves.

On the other side of Borderline Personality Disorder countless numbers of what are commonly now referred to as non-borderlines (people who do not have BPD) learn that more often than not when dealing with someone with BPD, in your life, you have to find ways to be able to cope with the reality of needing to light a new fire of your own in the hopes of extinguishing already chaotically raging borderline fires all around you.

Lighting your own fire can be anything from setting limits and boundaries, reiterating them as many times is needed, to making a sharp left hand turn in your life by extricating the borderline (regardless of your relationship to or with them) out of your life, if that is what you need.

Non-borderlines can step off the emotional roller coaster of the borderline in their lives through the practice of Mindfulness and Radical Acceptance.

Many with BPD do improve, some recover. However, the reality, in the lives of many non-borderlines, is that the borderline in many of their lives won’t even acknowledge that they have any problem that needs addressing let alone professional help.

There are some very good books out there that address the many ways that non-borderlines struggle to straddle the line between meeting their own needs, taking care of themselves and their families.

This ebook does not seek to outline the ways that you can actually undertake specific steps to change because other books clearly do that.

This ebook will address the meaningful and uncomplicated ways that the non-borderline can skillfully cope with the barrage of often abusive borderline transgression passed off as ways of relating borderline style.

This ebook seeks to inform you of how you can learn to just cope in any and all unforgiving moments of borderline chaos in your life as things are in the here and now which may well be the beginning of your taking stock and searching for the answers that you need. Answers that you need in order to identify what you actually want to do and can do to improve the quality of your own life or the quality of life for any children involved with a borderline parent.

Mindfulness, Observing, and Radical Acceptance can and will provide you with a renewed and clearer understanding of how to cope with borderline behaviour in each unfolding present moment skillfully in ways that will release you from the resulting suffering that you have been enduring.

Mindfulness and Radical Acceptance practice for the non borderline is about you and for you - it is not about learning what the person with BPD in your life may be learning if they are in DBT therapy. Yes the information is similar if not the same in many ways, however, the application of it isn't.

At worst, learning to be more skillful in your dealings with those with Borderline Personality Disorder will give you more peace and a firmer foundation within from which to make necessary decisions for your own welfare and that of any children involved.

At best, learning to be more skillful in your dealings with anyone with BPD in your life will slowly enable you to communicate in ways that may prove beneficial for both you and the borderline in your life, in the long run.



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