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Kerry E Wagner

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Member Since: Nov, 2008

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Never Let Go of My Hand
by Kerry E Wagner   

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Publisher:  Lifetime Publishing Type: 


Copyright:  2008 ISBN-13:  0978713311

Take a journey into the life of your bastard baby boy. With dreaming eyes, like dust he’ll rise into a troubled child and into a rebellious, betrayed teenager running desperate and wild. A fatherless son whose life seems to dead end before it ever begun. Your son runs...and he runs...and he runs from you and your mistakes that were so young, into the arms of the grief that you both will succumb and suffer from. This is the story of mothers and their undying love for their sons. Eric Payson came out of the womb hardheaded with no intent on taking life seriously. Most say it was in his blood and the rest say it was in his hug. Mischievous and ornery Eric seems to pride himself on embarrassing his mama. Most say that was in his blood too...and in his thug. But ain’t nothing too sour to unsweeten a mama’s love. Not when it’s for her one and only son. “You gon be the death of me boy” constantly echoes as Eric struggles to find himself and his way though life to salvage what’s left of his mama’s soul for him. For his sake...he better hope it ain’t never too late. If you ever been a mother then you’d know...ain’t nothing like the bond between a mother and her son.

Never Let Go of My Hand

A gripping, beautifully, written, new style coming of age epic that will leave you breathless and emotionally drained. Guarantee you will not be able to stop talking about this classic rendition, paying homage to the one and only... mother’s love. This is not only a story; this is a personal experience for all who dare to read. Eric Payson portraying your troubled son as he travels down the road of redemption through the mistakes, eyes, heart and soul of the one woman who will love him the most...YOU, his mother. "Never Let Go of My Hand" separates the boys from the men. "If you have ever been a mother you would know, there is nothing like the bond between a mother and her son."


LIFETIME PUBLISHING in association with the soon to be WAGFEST Publications Inc. proudly presents...

Excerpt only: From the long anticipated release:
My grandmother didn't sleep well at night because both my grandfather and my dad would stay out all night and not come home until wee hours of the morning. So she never slept well because she was concerned if they would actually make it home at all. When I was over, I slept in the bed with my grandmother.
I remember this one night. My grandmother got up to go to the kitchen. Just as she got out of the room, there was a knock at the window. That's all I remember, then somebody whispered,
"Mama let me in!"
Mind you, I don't even recall ever seeing my father in
person, nor have I ever seen a photograph of him with either me or my brother. So this whisper is the only recollection I would have of him alive.
"Mama let me in!"
Wanting to see him so bad, I woke up to tell her. "Mama Dorothy, my daddy say let him in."
She was bewildered being he had a key to let himself in. She simply said. "He did?" excitedly.
I assumed after that she thought he would come in the door. However my grandmother kept it like a mortuary around there with all that fancy ass funeral home furniture I called it. So I was glued to her after that. I wasn't about to go back in that bedroom by my lil' bad 4 year old self. She was gonna' come in that room with me, and she did.
On our way down the hall we heard another knock at the side window. It was more like a brushing. You know like a dog trying to alert his owner he wants to come back in the house. Then a faint whisper was there again saying
"Mama, Mama, let me in."
Then she replied "Button?" That's what she called him. "Button, is that you?"
Before he could answer good she was at the front door and I was right there beside her. Though I was scared, I was ecstatic at going to be able to tell my mama and my brother I saw my daddy for the first time. I wanted to see what he would look like aside from those pictures that were all through and about the house. This was going to be my defining moment.
She opened the door and no one was there. All there was was a set of tail lights speeding off into the night. My grandmother, not sure as to what or who it was for certain, immediately shut the door. She then began to lock every lock in the house. When suddenly the phone rang, it was my Godmother asking if everything was ok with Button. He had just left her house, knocking on the window. When she went to let him in he was gone. This concerned my grandmother now. My grandmother had a remedy for situations such as this…PRAY. Once she discussed things with God, everything was gon' be alright. My dad often came home in the wee hours of the night, to my grandmother's dismay. So she thought nothing of it.
We decided we'd go say some prayers and go on back to bed. A few hours passed when my grandmother heard a car pull up. Thinking it was my dad; she got right up and went to the door. I stayed in the bed this time. She said "We're going to surprise him when he comes and sees you in my bed."
As she opened the door she saw the same taillights pull away. Not recognizing the type of car it was or with the presence of mind to get the license plate. After the car turned the corner, she heard that faint whisper again. "Mama, mama I'm down here."
She replied, "Button?"
He murmured, "Here Mama, down here on the side walk".
Well my grandmother had a little walk way from the carport that you could see from the street, but from the door where she stood, you couldn't see that part of the sidewalk in which he lay. Shrubbery and bushes camouflaged her view. She stepped outside the door into the mysterious midnight. Took another step down and found her one and only son shot in the stomach murmuring in his own blood. Never making a sound, my grandmother rushed back in the house and got a few towels. Helped her son to his feet and made their way to the car. She laid my daddy in the back seat and came back into the house soaked in his blood. Still without ever saying a word she got me and a sheet and placed me in the front seat and wrapped me up. Without me ever looking into the back seat to get that world famous glimpse of my daddy, I sat my 4-year old butt in the front seat curious. I listened to my daddy moan and murmur. "He gon' get em, he gon' get em."
While my grandmother trembling drove, not to the hospital, but to my aunt's house to drop me off. What was my grandmother thinking? He was shot not me, but that's how it went down and that's all I remember about that.
Six weeks later my daddy died from Pneumonia from the bullet wound in his stomach. He had gone into a coma, but before he went, all he would say to anyone was "I'm gon get 'em. I'm gon get 'em." He never did.
My grandmother was there January 5, 1971 when he took his last breath. He died holding her hand and she ain't never let go.

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Reader Reviews for "Never Let Go of My Hand"

Reviewed by Valarie Fields 11/3/2009
Never Let Go of My Hand by Kerry E. Wagner is an amazing journey through the years that make a young boy a man. This book is written in first person and you can see and hear Eric's (the main character) growth from an arrogant and immature 6 year old to a young adult coming into 'manhood' in his own right.

In a time when society is quick to write off 'at-risk' children in the inner city, Kerry E. Wagner, not only humanizes them again, but helps each of us to understand the truth of these children's existence. It is said that there is no bond like the one between a mother and a son and that is what this book is about. Mothers love you when no one else can... whether they are near or far... and that love is the one thing that can turn lives around when everything else seems to be lost. Mr. Wagner has captured the essence of this bond and shared it in an exhilarating ride that takes you from laughter to flash backs of the secret pleasures of youth to the tears of lessons learned the hard way. Every step of the way, you will be laughing, crying, cheering and encouraging Eric through his journey as though you were there with him, because you feel like you are.

If you only read one book in the next five years, "Never Let Go of My Hand" is THE ONE to read. I finished it in a day because once I picked it up, I couldn't put it down, until I had read the last word and I finished knowing that I would be the FIRST person in line for a sequel!! It was AMAZING!!
Reviewed by Cathy Dean 4/22/2009
I already knew before I opened the book that it was going to be an emotional ride and I was not disappointed. From start to finish, the story kept me captivated. I laughed, I cried. Kerry is an amazing story teller.
Reviewed by theresa webster 3/27/2009
I have no idea how many 1000's of books I have read, however I can say there is no Author that has affected me with his words like Kerry E Wagner!!! Reality is not always pleasant or perfect and in “Never Let Go of My Hand” Kerry shows us that in a way that we can relate to. I mostly read for pleasure, it’s my escape but when I come across something that makes me THINK!! That is a special gift!!

The relationship between a Mother and Son is a bond that few can break. Kerry shows us just how true a Mothers (as well as Grandmothers) love is for her son. The reader has the privilege of seeing Eric begin to become a man.

I am looking forward to more from Kerry E Wagner!!!

Reviewed by Felecia Trotter 1/26/2009
I was drawn to this novel the minute I started reading. Kerry E. Wagner's gift of writing has a way of drawing the reader into the story as if you were there. While reading, there were times I would burst into laughter, and there were times I cried. I cried because I'm a mother of one son, I felt the pain. I felt the undying love a mother has for her son. Readers will be touched beyond what is expected, because just when you think everything is going to be alright, something else happens.
I feel privileged to have this novel, and look forward to more of Kerry E. Wagner's gift.
Reviewed by april howenstein 1/17/2009
There is no surprise to anyone on myspace that I am a loyal friend, supporter and fan of Kerry E Wagner and loved his book "She Did That". Just so ya know, I loved his next book too. "Never Let Go of My Hand" was more than I expected it to be and the experiences of his character were life changing for me as a reader as well as a mother. I can't begin to find the words of how this happened but I see things in a different light when I think about both of my sons and the type of bond that we have. It makes more sense now some how. Thanks Kerry. As you already know....I aint never lettin' go.
Reviewed by Andrea Powell 1/15/2009
This book intrigued me so much I could not put it down! This story of a young man's journey into adulthood as he relates to the women in his life, especially his mother and grandmother, was such a great read that had me turning page after page with great anticipation! Also, a mother of sons, I know first-hand of the unbreakable bond between a mother and her sons! No matter where he is, what he is doing, you feel it deep in your soul! If he is sick, you are sick, if he is hurtig, you are hurting, if he is in trouble, you just know it and most of all you are there when he needs you! However, as a mother, I havel also learned when to step in and when to step back to allow my sons to grow into fine young men. This book speaks directly to this aspect--the struggles and many trials a boy goes through to become a man in today's society. This book especiallty addresses how difficult it is for a young black young man to make it. Kerry E. Wagner has captured in his own special form of written word, and through the eyes of a black man, how tremendously hard it really is. I highly recommend this book as required reading for any mother of boys! Keep the hits coming, Kerry!
Reviewed by Gloria Graham 1/11/2009
When I first began to read Never Let Go of My Hand I had no idea what to expect. As I begin to read this book I was totally hooked and on the edge of my seat as to what was going to happen next. It was gripping, fascinating and mesmerizing but definitly demonstrates the true talent of Kerry and his ability to bring out raw emotions in his characters. I was amazed how the story line revealed the true love and dedication that mothers have for their sons even through all of the anguish that sometimes families go through. This reading was definitely an emotional ride but worth every minute from laughing to crying I was amazed. Truly enjoyed this book and look forward to future works.
Reviewed by Assuanta Collins 12/31/2008
Never Let Go of My Hand is a modern day African American classic. As I turned each page I was quickly reminded of another modern classic of the black experience, "Manchild in the Promised Land, written by Claude Brown in 1965. Never Let Go of My Hand is written with brutal honesty and a compassion that highlights the bond between a mother and her son... As a mother I related to the anguish and pain the mother and grandmother went through as they loved the men in their lives holding onto their hands, cheerleading for their success, being by their sides, never letting go, always pulling for… Never Let Go of My Hand is another depiction of black love and is a must read for years to come.
Reviewed by Lesa Handley 12/31/2008
Most people say a writer relates from an imagination deep within or just plain talented in their own rights. I believe Kerry Wagner demonstrates both of these characters in his book Never Let Go of My Hand. He has given us the belief that GOD in his wisdom has placed Kerry in a category that belongs to him alone. In his book Never Let Go of My Hand I discovered that we all have met or can relate to Eric Payson in some form or fashion. Eric lived life on his own terms, whether it was wrong or right. He stepped from muddy water into quicksand and stumbled from childhood to manhood without taking the advice from his loving mother or grandmother. But as life keeps happening and keeps given him the beating he deserves, he makes a turn for the better. I truly believe in life we have catalyst that causes us to change the direction of our lives and we start to live the life that GOD intended us to live. Kerry Wagner reminds me in this incredible book, To live Life full and Die empty.
Reviewed by Clara Elliott 11/25/2008
Excellent follow up to "She Did That!" This novel showcases Wagner's uncanny ability to paint a complete picture in the reader's mind while tugging at her heart strings. The characters are very real and remind us of our ever present weaknesses & desires to achieve more in this life. He also drives home the reality that one must live today because there is no promise of a tomorrow. Wagner has a knack for making his audience fall in love with and root for his protagonist who is forever the underdog. I found myself wanting to both protect and direct Eric as Wagner took me on this journey which coursed every one of my emotions. A raw and talented storyteller, Wagner is more than a movement & greater than a force! Kudos...
Reviewed by Suga williams 11/19/2008
If u ever read 'she did that" u can tell that kerry is an amazing writer. Never let go of my hand was so heartfelt that it can take u to a place uve lived or a place u was told about from ur great grandmother..the trails and tribulations that eric and his mom endured over the yrs and the love they all shared was times i wanted to slap eric and tell him to 'MAN UP" GET UR ISH TOGETHER ALREADY..LOL" ..the ending brought tears to my eyes when he asked his grandma if she wanted to fight to the end and she said lets fight. this was a beautiful read and had a southern feel to only problem with the book is that i wish is was more to was over to fast and when ur enjoyin a good book , u never want the ending to come..this book leaves u in a kinda suspense like whats gonna happen to eric and his siblings, what happend to their grandparents estate..who really killed grandpa MAN...WHATS GOOD WITH HIS GRANDPA RIGHT HAND MAN..Hmmmm cant wait for prt 2....
Reviewed by Randi Reese 11/17/2008

Kerry has a way with words that will capture you, and won't let go. Not only was I laughing, but I was crying also. Thinking to myself that Eric was just a shelfish little boy, whom didn't want to share his mama. Getting in trouble all the damn time. Too damn scared to go too his grandma house to spend da night.

This is must read book, and if haven't done so. Don't sleep on it, wake you're ass up and go get it.

Well done Kerry I truly enjoyed reading Never Let Go of My Hand. It was a pleasure to meet da man behind all those great blogs.

Reviewed by BRENDA JACKSON 11/13/2008
Reviewed by Ingrid Jeudy 11/6/2008
As I was reading this book, I did not know what to expect. Kerry has a way with words. He can make you laugh and cry all at the same time. As I read the book I started to have an understanding as to what a young man goes through when it come to dealing with a single mother. I went through so many emotions just when you dont expect something funny you get it. When you least expect it Eric will bring you to tears. This story is about that unconditional love that never dies.

Men don't like to share their feelings at times. Eric gave me a glimpse of how a young man thinks and feels about his mother. By the time I finish reading this book I had a clear understanding as to why noone can break that bond between a mother and her son.
Reviewed by Brandi Branch 11/5/2008
When reading this book, I had no idea what I could possibly expect. This book was ultimately a master piece waiting to happen. This book touched my soul in more ways than one. You automatically feel as if you are in the book with Eric. In my own experience of mess ups, heartaches, etc., I know what it is like to always go back to my momma and make sure that i know that, her HAND is always there. You almost have to put yourself in Eric's shoes to almost feel that connection between him and those important women in his life. You walk away with this book feeling, nourished, emotional, moved, blessed, encouraged, and matured.

Kerry Wagner, made you feel that connection between that maternal instinct that is almost necessary between Mother, grandmother, God Mother, or whoever took on that challenge to become one with you and always GOT your back when no one else did. This book is a must have, must read, and the MOST cherished book in my african american book collection.

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