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D. Earl Kelly

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Member Since: Nov, 2009

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Life In The Dweeb Lane - Memoirs of Time Spent On The Dork Side
by D. Earl Kelly   

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Category: 

Humor

Publisher:  Lulu.com ISBN-10:  0557089212 Type: 
Pages: 

119

Copyright:  8-2009 ISBN-13:  9780557089215
Fiction

Life In The Dweeb Lane is a collection of short, comical stories about my life (with a slight "stretch" now and then).

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Life In The Dweeb Lane

Most of us weren't part of the 90210 crowd.  We were encased in that faceless mass of averageness or, in my case, below.  For instance, we all remember how proud we were before graduation as we carried our new book of memories around campus and watched as our friends and teachers scribbled those memorable litle notes inside.  Some of mine were:

You poor demented little man.  Love, mom

Die a slow death!  Unnamed ex-girlfriend.

Who are you?  Head Cheerleader

Stop sleeping in my trashcan!  Your next door neighbor.


Excerpt

Marriage. It's just not the same any more. We've got ongoing arguments concerning traditional marriage, gay marriage, triad marriage, multiple husbands and wives. But one day, and that day is coming, there will be arguments as to the constitutionality of same species marriage. I can see it now.

"Do you?" "I do." "Arf-Arf."

The weddings will be held in newly remodeled barn-chapels. The loving couples, trios or herds will walk down the isle to the tender strains of "Ewe Are The Wind Beneath My Wings" or "You Mooooooove Me."

How about "Armadillo By Morning?" or "Funny How Swine Slips Away." "When Two Mules Collide?" or "Who's Your Craw-Daddy?"

For more, go to my site, diggerdan.what-in-hell-is-a-handbasket? Click on the picture of Arnold the Pig and win a free ham sandwich. Or, you could win two dozen pigs in a blanket. Real pigs. Real blankets. Happy honeymoon.




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