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The story of a survivor, her family, and her journey to wholeness.
As adults, when we are hurt or defeated, life goes on somehow. We get up, brush ourselves off and continue with out lives. But how do children pick up their lives and feel safe again? How can they trust God if their own family can't keep them safe? What do we say to a family scarred by incest? Is there hope? Can anything good come from such evil? Do these actions and choices repeat themselves through the family or can they be stopped? How do our choices affect the outcome of our lives? Can a godly grandmother who is a prayer warrior really affect the lives of her grandchildren? WITH HEART DIVIDED addresses these questions. It's a fascinating look into the lives of a large farm family growing up in America's heartland in the 1940's. You meet a little girl, Molly, who is harboring a dark secret that she must keep hidden until after she is married and raising her own family. Is her memory loss God's way of helping her cope with the trauma? Have you lost all hope of having anything good happen to you no matter how hard you try or how many self-help books you read? Do you harbor dark secrets that only God and you know about and feel you dare not share them? If you have ever been wounded to the point where you turn your back on God; feeling He has turned away or even betrayed you, then you will feel a connection to the lives in this true story. Or maybe you are serving people who are trying to cope with incest. Do you see the pain but don't know what to say or do for him or her? Do you want to ask more questions about the trauma but don't want to offend? Please come and meet Molly and let her story bathe your soul with hope that God is real, that He certainly loves us and will not leave us even when our world seems to fall apart.
Before I tell you my story, let me introduce you to Molly. She is six years old, forever young, forever a child. And she has secrets.
Molly sat in Sunday school and listened to her teachers tell her about God. She sang, “Jesus loves me, this I know, for the Bible tells me so…” with hands folded in her lap. She listened to her teachers tell her how God cares for and protects those whom He loves. How he saved Daniel in the lion’s den, David from Goliath, and the children of Israel from Pharaoh’s army. Molly listened and she never told them it was a lie. She never told them God did not love her. She never told them God abandoned her to a brother twelve years older than she.
She didn’t tell anyone. Her silence had been guaranteed by the memory of a new-born kitten whose legs and tail had been cut off, and whose eyes had been gouged out with a knife.
So Molly grew up with a heart divided. She carefully put away the truths no one wanted to hear. She buried them deep in her soul and never thought of them again with her conscious mind.
But her soul knew. And it built barriers against the lies she thought she had been told. God would not take care of her. No one would. Only she could care for herself. And she did. She became so adept at playing Church that she fooled even herself. She learned all the right answers and all the proper responses. She was always busy. In school she was the girl who could do anything. Art, music, literature, you name it; she did it, and very well. When she began dating, she did that very well, too; all proper and Christian.
SUPER CHRISTIAN. That was the tag that hung from Molly’s heart. She was so busy being busy she didn’t have time to examine the strangely silent soul. No time to wonder why “God is Love” rang false or why she could not respond in her heart to the beautiful words she sang and spoke.
Oh, there were times when the emptiness threatened to swallow her up. Sometimes she would break down, become depressed, but she did not know why. Only that she felt empty and alone and ugly. Only that she must do more and stay busy building the person God wanted Molly to be. But there came a time when the questions would not be silent; when answers rumbled in the distance like thunder before a storm. The real Molly was speaking!