TIMELESS GIFT





                                        By:  Susan Joseph

















A short story tale of imagination. Any similar names or situations are purely coincidence.
(C)2012 sljcreations.





           I’m really looking forward to this four-day weekend!  I’ve been pushing hard all year, working long hours on this project has taken it’s toll. I have to admit, I’m a little disappointed I will not be going home to Chicago and having dinner with mom. I just do not have the energy to make the trip and if I stay focused on getting my work on this Pele project wrapped-up I will have a better chance of going home and ringing in the New Year with her in a more relaxed state of mind.  Startled by the phone on my desk ringing, I laugh at the coincidence of timing; daydreaming about  ringing in the New Year, t hen  snapping back to reality of the moment with a ringing phone. Laughter still in my voice, I answer,” This is Andrea, How may I help you?” I glance out the window of my office to the amazing view of the sunset over the lake, I suck in a deep breath at the beauty. “ Hi dear”, a familiar voice says.” Will you be coming for dinner?” Spppppt. I let out the breath I had been holding in a dreaded sigh. Time to face the music.

        “  Hi Mom, I was just thinking of you.” Another timing coincidence, I think to myself. “I’m sorry I’m just not going to be able to come home for Thanksgiving dinner with you.” The heavy silence is thick and weighty as we both sink into the realization and disappointment of not gathering for the holiday as we have for the past umpteen years (don’t want to date myself here).”Oh, I see,” she says slowly. I can tell she is upset but choosing her words carefully.” Well, Christmas then, RIGHT?” Anxiously, I  say,” well I am working on possibly New Years ! “Another, heavy silence. “Well, ok. Will you be having dinner with anyone for Thanksgiving? Your
brothers ill be here with me”. Guilt rising in my tone of voice, I don’t have the heart to tell the truth. “Yes, a few of us from the office will be going to the new dinner and a play recreation center. It should be great, the reviews were awesome. Look mom,I will have to call you back the other line is ringing.” “Oh, ok dear, talk to you soon. I love you.” “Love you too!” i blurb out way too loud and fast.

        I put the receiver down with a thud. I just don’t know why I didn’t tell her the truth. The truth. I’ve been working non-stop since I moved here last year. I still haven’t unpacked all my boxes let alone socialize. I don’t even know anyone living in the same building. Well, no big deal. I will have four days to solve that, if i decide to get out of bed, that is. I know I have a lot to accomplish but I  really need to get some rest too. Oh well, I need to head over to the conference room for the status meeting and I need to get a wiggle on or I will not have time to grab a coffee on the way.

         I walk in with barely time to claim the last open seat as everyone in the room turns their head to look at me and away from Michelle who is standing at the front of the table already running down the agenda. So much for an inconspicuous entrance.” How about you Andrea?” Michelle doesn’t  miss a syllable. “Yes maam,”  I meekly reply. “I have collected the status reports from everyone else already, can you hand me yours, please?” she says as she pokes me with her open hand. “Oh, yes maam”

 I  say again as I start digging through my folder. I smile and let out a nervous giggle as i hand her my report. She doesn’t smile, she grabs the paper and turns around and picks up her conversation, “Now,let me see, I believe we were talking about the need to be punctual as the deadline for the project draws near “ she says as she looks straight at me. I sit down rather ungraciously and almost spill my coffee. I let out a big sigh and try and get myself recomposed.

        “Andrea? ANDREA! “Startled back to Michelle’s booming voice,my face feels instantly hot and I imagine looks bright red, my eyes bug wide open and with a sense that i must look like a deer in headlights as I sit bolt upright and say loudly,” Yes maam? “I can see the irritation all over her face as she says, “Andrea, what do you think about the likelihood of meeting that quota? “ “I’m sorry,” I  squeak .”  UGMMMM,” I clear my throat and start wiggling in my chair.I take a long deep breath and say, “I’m sorry, Michelle, I’m not sure.” Wrong answer. Michelle starts walking toward me with a grimace and disappearing line on her face where there once was just a set of lips. She stands in front of me, puts her hands on her hips and starts to speak very slowly in a deep voice as if she thinks I am a mute.
“H a v e y o u b e e n t r a c k i n g t h e p r o g r e s s o n t h e P e l e p r o j e c t t t tt? “
 “Yes maam, “i smile.” GOOD !”,she says and “how many vendors have been verified? “  “Two Hundred and Thirty Three,” I reply. “Well, We NEED
to be at 70% by next Thursday.What have you established you will need to do in order to accomplish this,keeping in mind, we are closed on Monday and Tuesday?” “ Maam, let me meet with my team and give you an outline tomorrow.” I  say quickly.
 “NO,No, No”,echoes bouncing off the walls as she puts her hand down on the table in front of me, causing my papers and file to fly into the air and dance to the floor.” I will  see you in my office at 5:30 today and we will go over the details of your outline together” she says loudly. “Yes,maam” I say blinking my eyes and covering my panic with a smile.” Very well then,meeting over” she says  and she spins around and walks out of the room. I let out a big sigh and bend over to retrieve the scattered papers. As I reach for the last one John and I touch hands. He has bent down to attempt to help me. I nervously smile and say “Thank You. “  He says, “don’t mention it, would you like to have lunch with me in the park?”  “Oh, thank you but I will need to get back to my desk pronto and get this outline done!” “ Another time then?” he asks.” “Uh , sure,”I smile. I don’t know how many times he is going to ask me the same question and get the same answer. Oh well, I’m going to grab a candy bar from the machine as i head back to my desk. Maybe the sugar will soothe my overwhelmed and lost self.

          I take one last quick look at the lake view behind my desk as I gulp down the last bite of the candy bar. Well here goes. I sit down, re organize the papers from the messed-up file and hunker into the Zone for some serious crunching. “Excuse me Andrea?”  “Huh,” I look up to see John standing over my piles of papers. “It’s five and I am headed home now, did
you need any help getting your outline together? You need to see
Michelle in thirty minutes. instinctively, I stand straight up. “Oh my gosh,what time did you say it was?” He repeats it loudly, “It is five o’clock!” “Oh my gosh I have no idea what happened to the time! Oh,oh, no, Thank You John, I have everything prepared and just need to print the outline and organize these papers back into the folder”,I say as I start sweeping the papers like a robot street sweeper. “I appreciate your offer, have a great night,see you tomorrow. “
“Um, no, did we have plans? “he says slowly. “What do you mean ?”,I say looking at him nervously. “Well, it’s Friday and we are closed on Monday and Tuesday for Thanksgiving. Are we getting together tomorrow?”he says very quickly. “Oh, gosh,no, I mean, gosh, I really forgot what day it was, I have been so focused on this outline that I lost my bearings”. John quickly looks at the floor, but not fast enough.I was able to see the fast droop on his face. “I didn’t mean to sound like that, I’m sorry, ’m having a tough day. I’m really looking forward to getting some much needed rest this weekend. Let me put your number in my phone and I’ll give you a call ok?”.  “Ok, cool” he says,grabbing a pen off my paper mess; he writes his number on  the backof one of my business cards he took from the holder on the corner of my desk. “Good  Night. “  he says. “Yes, have a great night,” I say and  we both smile as he turns quickly to exit my office.

           “ANDREA? ANDREAAAAAA? “The speaker on my phone is droning a dreadful tone.” Yes maam.”  Oh,   I move over and push the conference button down and say again, “Yes maam.?” “ Are you ready to go over the
outline? “”Yes maam,” I reply,” I will be in your office in one moment.” “ Well, let’s be quick about it, I have guests waiting at the airport for me to pick them up” she says sternly. “Yes maam,”I reply.  Exactly five minutes later i am shoving the remainder of my desk into my bag. Ahhhh, I sigh,what a day!  I’m so glad i was able to impress Michelle with a beautiful plan and outline that she is sure will work to meet our deadline. She even smiled and said have a nice Thanksgiving.   Now, I need to run or i will miss the last train out and it is a bit cold for walking today..........

          Settling in to my seat, I quickly look around to notice that I am lucky to have a chair as people are now lining up in the aisles as the doors close and the conductor’s voice disguised with the crackling of the overhead speakers beams out,” uptown in twenty minutes folks”. I look out the window and watch the platform beams until there are no more to count. I look up to the sky and start wondering what it would be like to float around on a cloud. I glance back and notice that we are stopping.

Wow, that was fast. I can’t believe what a crazy day this has been,my sense of timing has escaped me. I shake my head and grab my bag from beneath my feet and stand up. The doors open and I get lost in the sea of people filing out of the train. Up the stairs and out on the street I think to myself how funny we look, like a bunch of sheep being herded off field.  As i stand in front of my door I am digging for my keys in my bag. A man walks up to me and says” Hey”. I quickly glance up from my bag and
immediately drop it from my hands. Awkwardly I bend over to retrieve it and bump heads as I realize we both went for the bag at the same time. “Oh my gosh, “I bolt upright.” I am so sorry” I say nervously. We both stand face to face rubbing our heads.” Oh  no ,apology all mine”he says. It was so silent you could hear a pin drop on the carpet as we both stood mesmerized looking into each others eyes. He pokes out his hand and says suavely “Hi, I’m Alan. I don’t believe we have met. I live across the hall” , as he motions with the other hand, “B4”, he says. I just stand there smiling, i didn’t even turn to look in the direction he was pointing. I was frozen in place with a goofy smile on my face.”Your name?” he says. Watching my face,expecting a reply his expression changes when I just stand there staring. “Your name?” he says again, a little slower and without a smile.” Uh, oh, oh,I’m sorry, I’m Andrea. I live right here.”  “I see”, he laughs. I reach down again and grab my bag”.Uh, nice to meet you” I smile. He says, “yep, likewise, do you run?” “Excuse me,” I say, “Run? “ “You know, exercise, walk, run?” he says laughing. “OH,” i let out a giggle, way too loud. He starts to laugh. “Not really”,I say. “Well, would you like to give it a try? I would love to have a run buddy”. “uh, OK! “I say, again, too loud.
” Great!” he says, “knock on your door at 6:30 then”.  “Tonight “I say.” No, in the morning.” he replies “OHHHH, ok then “I say “,trying to hide my exasperation. He turns to head to his door. I walk in my place and shut the door. I slide down the wall and sit on the floor. Am I crazy!! I was planning on sleeping late, getting some rest, NOW, I’m running at 6:30 in the morning. Oh my gosh, What box are my gym shoes in? What am I going to wear? What the hell was I thinking? I know. I wasn’t. Temporary insanity, I was temporarily insane,blinded by the unbelievable good looks and charming voice. I have lost my mind! I reach down in my bag for my phone. I pull off my card that I had taped to it, the one that I need to get John’s number off of and put in my phone. I did promise to call him. I need to set my alarm. I need to get into bed now, so much for sleeping in ...

        Gooood Morning folks. I jump up out of bed and look around at all the boxes surrounding the room. Rise and shine it is going to be a glorious day today. “Yeah,right,”i say before realizing I am talking to a radio announcer. Panic sets in. I don’t know which box to look in first. Like a raving lunatic i start frantically ripping into boxes in search of my gym shoes. A quick look at the time, great, enough time left to fix my hair and put on make up. Knock, Knock. I looked around to see where that noise was coming from before I realized, it is him! He is knocking on the door. I
do a quick look in the mirror and smooth over my hair that is flying all over like branches of a tree. I run to the door and slow down and carefully open the door. “GOOD MORNING!” I hear in that way too scrumptious tone. I just stand there looking at him. Oh my gosh, the morning sun was rushing in behind him and he was beaming gorgeous. He smiled and looked at me.” OH, yes, Good morning.” I  say dreamily. “Let’s get a jig on” he torts. “Uh, yeah, let’s roll “,I say giggling and tossing my head back and forth like a rag doll, really? temporary insanity iIremind myself. I close the door behind me. I smile and think, Oh my god, what the hell was I thinking. I haven’t been moving this body besides walking to and from work all year!  Looking at the expression on my face he says, “we will take it light today,ok?”  “Oh good,thanks”,I say meekly with I’m sure, must be a bright red face,I wonder to myself, did I think that to my self or did I say it out loud,I   shrug and put one foot in front of the other and off we go.........

     He takes a look around before sitting on the couch and says,”did you just move in?” “Nah,” I say as I head to the fridge for some orange juice,”I have been working on a project at work and haven’t had any time to get settled.”  “Oh, what do you do for work?”he asks. “I’m a project manager at Delphi Technologies,” I say,” How about you, What is it you do for work?”
“Jack of all trades, master of none”he chuckles. “I dabble in a few things here and there”,he says with a grin. I  look down in just a knick of time to avoid spilling the orange juice all over the counter.i release a big sigh and walk over to the couch with a glass in each hand. I offer him the juice and notice the light blinking on my machine. I set my juice down on the end table ,walk over to the phone, pick it up and say” Will you excuse me a moment, I must have missed a call?”  “Sure, don’t mind me”.he says as he lays back on the couch and flips his shoes off.
I walk into my bedroom and shut the door. I have a queezzy feeling in my stomach and can’t figure out if it’s because I’m hungry, temporarily insane or something else. I quickly dial into my voicemail. “Hi Andrea,it’s Charlie,Can you call me as soon as you get this message?”Drat, my brother probably want’s to let me have it for upsetting mom and not coming to dinner! Well, I’m just going to let him stew for a bit, I have something else on the stove.....

     Almost running back into the living room, I put the phone down on the
table as I pick- up my juice.”Do you want any more juice?” I ask. “No, thanks,actually,if you don’t mind, I’m going to grab a quick shower and head out for the day. Knock on your door at 6:30 tomorrow? His words flow out of his mouth as smooth as a baby’s bottom. Trying to hide the disappointment, I say, “Sure,I really enjoyed the run, running buddy” with a big smile. I walk behind him as he is already on his way to the door. He opens it and turns with a devilish grin and says”Great! See yaaaaaa. “I close the door and head back to finish off the juice. There is that funky feeling in my stomach again, what the? Just then my cell phone is ringing loudly from my bag which is, where is my bag? I start looking around the room quickly, nope, off to the hall I am running. Did I leave it by the door?Just as I turned to head off back to my bedroom I dropped to the floor.”OUCH!” I screamed as i hit the floor with a deadening THUD! I grabbed for my right calf and pulled off my gym shoe with the other hand. My toes were curling in under my foot,”UGHHHH “I hollered,” Charlie Horse!” I sat rubbing my calf for a minute and the phone stopped ringing. As i sat there I remembered that I had left my phone in my bag by the nightstand when I shut-off the alarm! My gosh, now i need to set the alarm again, and again, i will not be sleeping in.What the hell is the matter with me? I really wanted to get some rest not train for a marathon! i must be lonelier than i realize if I abandon  all intelligent reasoning to croon over a man like some kind of high school brat with a crush! I don’t know what i am more mad at, that he trotted out of here,that I’m sitting here with a cramp, that i got up at 6:30 this morning, that I’m going to do it again tomorrow morning,that I have this crazy sensation in my stomach,that i need to call my brother back so he can blast me, orrrrrr   ALL OF THE ABOVE! CRAP,CRAP, and double CRAPPPPP!! I let go of my leg and just plopped down on the floor. That’s it,little miss two year old. Lay on the floor and have a tantrum,let me know when you are done...

     Will someone answer that phone already? I sat up and looked around. Did I just dream that,nope, there is the phone ringing. I jump up off the floor and notice it is dark outside. As I am running for the phone I glance at the clock: 8:30. What the? I grab the phone, “Hello” i say in a deep raspy voice like i haven’t had oxygen for a day. “Andrea, Andrea, is that you? “I cough and answer with irritation,”YES, Charlie,it IS ME! What’s up?”
“Look,Andrea”,Charlie’s voice is cracking. Great here it goes, well I’m not gonna take it. “NO, you look CHARLIE! I’m SORRY, but I just can’t make it for DINNER! NO, I DID NOT,try and upset mom on purpose, I JUST CAN’T MAKE IT, OK?” There was a long silence. I waited. Nothing. MMM,sheepishly I say”Charlie? Are you there?” Silence. I can hear
breathing on the line and there is no dial tone. Maybe i shouldn’t have been so quick with the tongue. Thing is, once it rattles out like that, can’t say never mind, i didn’t mean it. “Charlie? You there?” Silence. “Look, Charlie, I’m sorry, I just have been working long hours and i’m tired. I didn’t mean to take it out on you. I’m sorry” .  Very quietly he says” Look, Andrea, it’s mom, she is in intensive care and the doctors said to call the family in for good-byes, and quickly. I’m sorry, but you need to get here fast!” Instantly I feel that wrenching in my stomach again , I feel like I’m going to throw up, my body is covered in chills and rigidly locked in place.”Andrea?” you there Andrea?”You are on your way right?”.......

     i sit numbly on my bed, slowly I stand up. My mind starts to race full speed ahead with a million I gotta’s ,but my body is in neutral and can’t find a gear.I’m ignoring the ache in my gut. I think, maybe, it will be my new normal. No time for that now, I need to pull it together, get myself to the hospital, maybe  ,maybe the doctors are wrong. It happens right, people bounce back as quick as they drop, right? I mean, I’m sure everything is gonna be just fine,I should be there anyway. I really screwed up,I really should have left work yesterday and headed home. OH MY GOD,what if...... STOP, JUST STOP,this INSTANT!!!!! Get your head OUTOF YOUR ASS and get YOUR ASS MOVING NOW!!!!! Like a machine, I flew around the place throwing stuff in my suitcase, getting an online check in ticket, called the cab...

   Sitting on the plane waiting for take off gave me the chance to send off some quick e-mail. One to Michelle, One to John, oh, I don’t know Alan’s number, or e-mail address, or, or anything. I panic as i imagine him pounding on my door tomorrow morning and thinking I’m a big JERK! So much for that romance......This is your captain, “we are ready for take off, please turn all electronic devices off until further notice. “I closed my eyes and felt the hot tears rolling down my cheeks.I  swallowed hard and tried to stop ,too late,I just sat there crying, i coudn’t stop. “Miss”, um, Miss are you ok?”a sweet voice next to me politely asked. I used my sleeve to wipe away the wetness and tried to look the other way as i softly said, “Not really, but thanks for asking” I closed my eyes,put my head down in my arms and pretended the world disappeared......

     I was rolling my suitcase behind me down the long hall making all kinds of noise but i cared less. There at the end of the hall balled up on a tiny
couch were both of my brothers;both staring off in the opposite directions with the same blank expressions on their faces. In unison they both turned to look and see what all the noise was. Their recognition of me was immediate and both stood straight up and put their hands in their pockets at the same time. If it had been any other situation, I probably would have laughed historically at such a sight, but,not now, now, i burst into tears and let go of my suitcase. They both reached for my bag and I plopped down on the couch. They stood there looking at me. All I could do was cry. All they could do was stand there looking at me. it was probably all of five minutes but it felt like hours.  They each sat down on the sides of me and we were squished like peas in a pod. That’s what mom would have said, or did say,I swear I thought I heard her voice say my three sweet peas in a pod. We sat there in silence, i don’t really know how long it was. Finally,I said,” well, should we go to her room? Where are her doctors? Are they wrong? Is she better? Can we take her home? “No one answered me. They just sat there quiet. “WHAT, NO ANSWERS? DID YOU WAIT FOR ME TO GET HERE AND TAKE CARE OF EVERYTHING?!!! FINE, Let me go find out what is GOING ON!!!! “ I  started to get up and they both put their hands on my arms and pulled down hard. I couldn’t have gotten up, even if I had tried.” WHAT ARE YOU TWO LUGHEADS DOING?!! LET ME UP!!! I need to take care of this! YOU LUGHEADS AREN’T DOING IT, LET ME!!!”

“Andrea, please, please calm down”Charles was saying between tears. MY GOD, MY BROTHER IS CRYING! “There is nothing more that can be done, Andrea, we’re sorry, Mom is gone”.  “WHAT?!!!! Gone? Did they send her to another hospital? Could they not take care of her? What are
you LUGHEADS WAITING FOR?” I screamed. “Look, Andrea, this isn’t going to help matters. Can you please relax? There is nothing the hospital is doing , there is nothing for us to handle here. We need to go over to the funeral home and go over the arrangements there.Mom is, well, she, DAM IT! SHE IS GONE ANDREA!!! “I swallowed hard. i was completely numb. I laid back on the couch and sunk to the floor. Rag Doll for certain now.......

     I don’t know how the next day and a half went. I really can’t be sure, the lines of reality are but a blur. Because of the holiday there would need to be a bit of a delay in the services and it will take a little doing for people to reschedule there travels to be here. I re sent e-mails off to John and Michelle and decided to check out upstairs in my old bedroom for a couple of days. There really wasn’t much more to do but wait. i pulled back the covers of my childhood bed and climbed in, just like I had done zillions of times before;however, this time, this time, will never be like any of the other times.    “Andrea” Charles called from the hall. “We need to leave in thirty minutes” OK, I hollered back. I put on a black dress from mom’s closet and took her favorite earrings out of her jewelry box and tucked them into my wallet. I walked over to the dresser and opened the bottle of “nerve” pills that my doctor called in the prescription for and Charlie went and picked up for me. I haven’t been out of this room since i came into the house. I could hear my brothers downstairs, talking. They don’t know what to do with me. They think I’m not coming to the funeral home with them. They don’t want to leave me here by myself. I walk down the stairs and they immediately stop talking and look at me with panic on their faces. I say nothing and walk over to the door. I take a deep breath, I am relieved as I feel the pills kicking in. I open the door and walk slowly to the car. I get in the back seat and my brothers get in the car. The ten minute ride to the funeral home is wrenching. Silence so heavy I can’t breathe......

     I’m sitting on the front step outside my mother’s home. My older brother went home with his family. They only live an hour away. Charlie is inside packing things up for donation pick-up. It has been decided that he and I will move back in to the house. I gave my notice at work. Since I hadn’t fully unpacked it shouldn’t be that hard to move back. I’m not sure yet what kind of job I want to look for. I  start to cry. “Dear” I hear that familiar voice and my body is covered in chills. I stop crying. I sit real still.I hold my breath. Waiting, afraid to move. My heart is pounding so hard I’m afraid it will break through my chest and fall to the ground. “Yes, Dear”It’s me, my little sweet pea. I am here with you, always. Look up, look, I am right here.”A swallow hard and try not to move. My body is shaking and I feel
like I want to run or collapse or”Don’t be afraid Dear. Everything is fine. Our love is so deep it collapses all time. Any moment you want, you can speak to me.” I look up and I see MY MOTHER! She is standing in thin air her beautiful dress and silver hair are blowing in the breeze. it is completely still, there is no wind. As if she is reading my mind she says, “My dear Andrea” These gentle winds i ride glide me on the magic carpet ride of love. I can sweep in and be with you anytime we like. Just like before, just a little different. Please don’t be sad, I want to share love and joy just as we always have, ok? “My mind starts to race as i start apologizing for not being here, and how sorry I am and how sad I am and a cab pulls up to the curb and she says “Anytime, Love and Joy, He is a keeper Andrea. He has come to be with you. Please allow him in. Love
and Joy my little sweat pea” She vanishes off into thin air! I stand up and reach for where she was just floating. Gone, again! I look and there up the side walk is John heading this way. He smiles big and is waving his hand.




   “Andrea. Andrea!” He hugs me. I fall into his arms and it feels so good.



          I hear my mothers voice in my head, Love and Joy, Allow........