"Ole Red and Me", by Anne Mckee
Featured in The Meridian Star, Meridian, Mississippi, 2005 and selected by Mississippi Public Radio for The Commentary Program, 2005. State winner in the Mississippi Federated Women's Club creative writing contest, 2003.
We have a new riding lawn mower and it's a beaut! I loved it at first sight. My discerning eye appreciated the bumblebee yellow fenders with black detailed edging. The lovely lines of the front hood coordinates with the over-sized tires glistening in all their blackness. I just couldn't wait to get my hands on it!
Come Saturday morning I was hopping up and down with glee. "I get to cut grass today! I get to cut grass!" My husband and I made our way into our barn - well, we call it a barn. It's really a separate garage with two-car parking and special room for a travel trailer that we sold years ago. But sitting in the place of honor now is the brand spanking new riding lawn mower! My "Ole Red" mower has been moved to the rear. After many years of faithful service "Ole Red" deserves a rest. Now, "Ole Red" has still got some life left, no doubt. My husband said that we could use it for the rough areas of the lawn. Of course, my husband claims that I have used "Ole Red" roughly the whole time making it my personal bush hog. I must admit that I do feel so powerful and in control riding atop of "Ole Red". Why, if I see something I don't like I just roll right over it (poor thing!) and "Ole Red" will gobble it right up!
As we entered the barn, I went right straight for the new mower. My husband called my name and as I jerked by head around to answer him I noticed he had motioned toward "Ole Red". I was totally stunned!"You mean you want me to use "Ole Red", I asked. My husband answered, "Yes, use it until you get the hang of the new mower." The hang of the new mower, I thought as I walked to the back of the barn. Now what could that mean?
As I approached "Ole Red" I declare the mower actually grinned at me! Gave me the "willie's" - now I know that a mechanical object cannot grin but there is was (the grin, that is)and did I see the wink of an eye? That's going to far I decided as I rolled "Ole Red" out to fill up with gas. I decided to keep "Ole Red's" friendliness to myself - didn't need any jaw-dropping from my husband this morning, although I do it to him regularly.
By then my husband had cranked up the bright, glossy new mower and it sat purring as he took a cloth to shine up the already shiny bright yellow fenders. I picked up the gas can and filled "Ole Red's" tank to the brim and cranked it up as it shook and shimmied spouting smoke all around the barn. But after a few minutes, "Ole Red" had its gruff purr a-going and was ready for action.
My husband and I left the barn in a dead heat! I headed for the high grass all along the rough area of the lawn and he headed for the smooth silky grass of the main yard. "Ole Red" attacked the tall grass and weeds with a vengeance and great force. As I headed for the intimidating and always spiteful kudzu patch, "Ole Red" kicked into turbo with skill and grace over running the enemy. Oh, how sweet is victory!
As "Ole Red" and I coasted along the nut grass and briars, I happened to notice that my husband had stopped to take a water hose and wash off the oversized tires on the new mower. "What a wimp", I thought - "that mower just can't take it!" I reached down and patted "Ole Red" on her (notice I said "her") scratchy faded hood. My girl and I are survivors! We don't need that special pansy attention!
Just about that time my husband motioned to me and I rode over to see what he needed. You see, "Ole Red" and I are dependable. We can be counted on (she and I). She understands me and I understand her. We have many, many years of companionship all over the lawn. Who needs that new fancy, smancy mower anyways?
As I reached my husband and his "pet", he said. "Are you ready to swap out? I thought you might want to give a turn around the lawn on this new mower?"
I answered with an air of well, I suppose, arrogance. "What makes you think I need to "take a turn around the lawn" on that fancy new mower of yours anyway? "Ole Red" and I are doing just fine", I yelled as I rode off into the sunset on my old friend back into the muck and the mire of "real" grass cutting.
There it went again! The jaw dropping that is as my husband stared after "Ole Red" and me. But I probably won't share "Ole Red's" grin and wink with him - not today, anyway.
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