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Soy Criada

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Weh Mi Car
by Soy Criada
Sunday, October 19, 2008

Rated "G" by the Author.

       


     Jamaicans are a set of people that have a unique sense of humour. Weh Me Car is one of the humourous stories from Jamaica is which Miss.Jul drove her car into Town and forgot it there.







No stop gwann read di story


When she done she step outa di shap an same time one backup man fi one a di Lucea mini bus come up an seh. "One more seat left”. Knowing dat she late she step straight inna di mini bus.
She siddung ,rest her head pan di back a di seat ,close her yie little bit and rest . She know she naah go too late fi her work,again; For wid dat deh driver wha siddung round di steering , when him move off, di concord hav fi good fi ketch him back.


An the story continues
Quick, quick, she reach near har friend shop weh she use to lef har car. She press di bus buzzer ,but when she look out an no see her car She seh “ gwaan driver,gwaan”
She rub her head, an wrinkle her brow an mumble to herself.” an seh Look yah ,mi no member seh a work mi did park mi car. By di time the bus move off bout five chain she halla out.” One stop driver one stop”.
Di people dem tun round, and one tall, black, mawga,miserable man bex like a bull ask “Lady wha meck you neva come off down deh so? . She seh. Mi think mi did lef mi car down deh but mi just memba seh, mi park ie a Lucea


Mi seh Ma ,di whole bus burst out inna one laugh as she sep out . Same time she dial har work place while she deh teck out har fare fi gi di griver.
You waan hear har pan di phone a tell har bass seh.“ Miss I am going to be very late.I am down the road close by but I have to take another bus and go back to Lucea. I have forgotten my car there."

Man di whole bus burst out a laugh all over again.






Di story no tap deh so you nuh
Di worst part a, it , no waan teacher Ma! She always a quarrel when di pickney dem figet one simple sound dat she teach.dem


For if dem fi seh Sh and a meck mistake an seh ,Ci she put down no ends a quarrel, bout how dem caan remember one little phonic sound.


But see yah, A wonder wha run eena fi har mind when she see dat she to caan figet. Me no know wah she tell di pickny dem a school afta dat.?
When she ketch back a work you would a think she would a look shame .No Ma., Har teet dem when deh kin so tell..She seh ,Since she wen done late a ready ,she just galang go buy her Merica ticket.


An guess wha di travel agent tell har ? No dat she was vey lucky,cause, di ticket deh go up by eight thousand and fifty dollar di next day.


You know, sinting, it no meck no sense you laugh afta church people you know. Yes Misses , she a one a dem. Dem seh dem bless, an God teck special care a dem.


For antil tiday day you caan convince har dat a no God intervene inna the ticket affair an meck har jump pan di mini bus and drive weh lef har big ,big Mitsubishi Galant Car.




Short story by
Soy Criada
Copyright 2006 .Juliet Christie Murray


Weh Mi Car
Read dis yah story
 

You eva hear the story bout wan woman dem call Miss Jull who have her chris ,chris car but she only waan fi drive ie when she deh go a work or if she hav fi carry nough sinting from Mo Bay.
 

Some time if she hav fi shap pan Barnett Street an go dung St. James Street she wi drive . She seh ,as long as she ha fi park and walk round inna di town she think ie easier and cheaper fi park her car an teck bus.
 

Well dis yah day, she hav fi go change her check inna Lucea . She was kina running late. She also plan fi go a Merica inna a two week time,so she think dat day was di best time fi buy di plane ticket.
She did plan fi park di car a har friend shop inna Sandy Bay and teck di bus. Since time when deh run out and she no waan go a work late ,she decide ie woulda betta if she just drive an done, instead a waste time an wait pan di bus.

 

 

  a tell you dis yah story a sinting.
She drive an park di car inna Mid town Plaza inna the hart a Lucea. Then she walk go a NCB Bank ,spend bout forty five minutes ,den she go a Scotia Bank an spend bout one hour tanup inna di line.

After that she lef an go a one Chine shop an buy quarter dozen stocking because ie cheapa fi buy dem inna dat deh store worst if you buy three one time.
Miss Jull always credit clothes from her friend Mell who have one stall inna di Lucea bus park. When she cross di road fi go look fi Mell an pay har bill, she memba dat she no buy di Merica ticket yet.
She kiss har teeth an seh dat deh ticket hav fi tan ,because she well late alreddi . Anyhow she still go a har friend ,pay her bill an chit chat little bit .


 

No stop gwann read di story


When she done she step outa di shap an same time one backup man fi one a di Lucea mini bus come up an seh. "One more seat left”. Knowing dat she late she step straight inna di mini bus.
She siddung ,rest her head pan di back a di seat ,close her yie little bit and rest . She know she naah go too late fi her work,again; For wid dat deh driver wha siddung round di steering , when him move off, di concord hav fi good fi ketch him back.
 

An the story continues
Quick, quick, she reach near har friend shop weh she use to lef har car. She press di bus buzzer ,but when she look out an no see her car She seh “ gwaan driver,gwaan”
She rub her head, an wrinkle her brow an mumble to herself.” an seh Look yah ,mi no member seh a work mi did park mi car. By di time the bus move off bout five chain she halla out.” One stop driver one stop”.
Di people dem tun round, and one tall, black, mawga,miserable man bex like a bull ask “Lady wha meck you neva come off down deh so? . She seh. Mi think mi did lef mi car down deh but mi just memba seh, mi park ie a Lucea


Mi seh Ma ,di whole bus burst out inna one laugh as she sep out . Same time she dial har work place while she deh teck out har fare fi gi di griver.
You waan hear har pan di phone a tell har bass seh.“ Miss I am going to be very late.I am down the road close by but I have to take another bus and go back to Lucea. I have forgotten my car there."

Man di whole bus burst out a laugh all over again.

 

 

 

 

Di story no tap deh so you nuh
Di worst part a, it , no waan teacher Ma! She always a quarrel when di pickney dem figet one simple sound dat she teach.dem


For if dem fi seh Sh and a meck mistake an seh ,Ci she put down no ends a quarrel, bout how dem caan remember one little phonic sound.
 

But see yah, A wonder wha run eena fi har mind when she see dat she to caan figet. Me no know wah she tell di pickny dem a school afta dat.?
When she ketch back a work you would a think she would a look shame .No Ma., Har teet dem when deh kin so tell..She seh ,Since she wen done late a ready ,she just galang go buy her Merica ticket.
 

An guess wha di travel agent tell har ? No dat she was vey lucky,cause, di ticket deh go up by eight thousand and fifty dollar di next day.
 

You know, sinting, it no meck no sense you laugh afta church people you know. Yes Misses , she a one a dem. Dem seh dem bless, an God teck special care a dem.
 

For antil tiday day you caan convince har dat a no God intervene inna the ticket affair an meck har jump pan di mini bus and drive weh lef har big ,big Mitsubishi Galant Car.
 

 

 

Short story by
Soy Criada
Copyright 2006 .Juliet Christie Murray

 

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Reviewed by Regis Auffray 10/31/2008
The "dialect" takes some getting used to but I loved it and your story, Soy. Thanks for sharing. Love and blessings,

Regis

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