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Stephen W. Pollard

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     In my latest short story series entry "Family Of Champions And Leaders / Jayson Gannon / 65th Birthday Party" is about a 65th Birthday Bash in a lavish hotel ballroom that was planned and hosted by his wife Caitlyn, who invited all who had played a major importance in his life, as he was also celebrating 50 years of being involved in one capacity or another in baseball.

 

FAMILY OF CHAMPIONS AND LEADERS


Jayson Gannon / 65th Birthday Party


Silver Springs, Maryland

April 5, 1919



The opulently lavish ballroom at the Hotel Alexander was decorated for a birthday party bash for a renown local hero, legend and resident.


The decorations were for the 65th Birthday party for baseball legend and now part owner of the Washington Eagles baseball team. Jayson Gannon who was now entering his 50th year of being involved in baseball as a player, manager and now a team executive. 


Jayson’s wife Caitlyn made all of the arrangements and plans, decorations and the guest list for the birthday party, inviting those who had played a major importance in his life. From his former Diamonds teammates Matthew Phillips, Paul Williamson and Baseball Commissioner Rance Hermann, Pittsburgh Gold Sox’s owner Fred Charles, Cincinnati Knights owner Alexander Hampton, Washington Eagles owner Gerald Statler, Washington D.C. mayor Harold Lehman, Jayson’s cousin Franklin Forsythe, his wife Jeanne, their children, sons Andrew and Kenneth, and daughter Jane Anne, Jayson and his wife Caitlyn, their son Richard, daughter Melinda, along with Jayson’s father and mother in law William and Mary Kate McDevit.


All of the invited guests each spoke about what stood out the most to them about Jayson. The aged Matthew Phillips and Paul Williamson reminisced about the day that they arrived at the carnival circus to pick up then then 16 year old Jayson and their run in with the circus ringmaster Landis Hawkins who shook his boney finger and proceeded to lecture them.


Another aged baseball veteran and baseball chief executive Rance Hermann got up to speak about how talented Jayson was and how he could do anything on the baseball field and make it look so easy.


Then team owners Fred Charles of Pittsburgh and Alexander Hampton of Cincinnati both spoke of how when Jayson arrived to play on their teams how just his presence invigorated all of the other players on their teams.


Washington owner Gerald Statler then got up and spoke of how when Jayson arrived in town how he took charge and command of the team and took it to another level of play that is rarely seen and achieved in any sport.


Of course one of Jayson’s benefactors, his cousin Franklin Forsythe then got up to speak. Franklin started off by saying that in his pitching career was he was always a cut above the rest and already regarded as a legend, then Jayson traded for him to bolster the Washington Eagles pitching staff which put him upon the pinnacle at the best ever pitcher of all time, all because of his manager, Jayson.


Then it was Jayson’s wife Caitlyn who got up to speak next. She started off by saying that when her family moved from Louisville, Kentucky to Cincinnati, Ohio, how she was hired by Alexander Hampton as his secretary, it was like the angels created a match in heaven and it was destiny when she met Jayson, and then her parents William and Mary Kate got up to speak, saying that they looked upon Jayson, not only as a son in law, but also as if he were their own son.


Then Jayson’s son Richard got up to speak, asking his father this interesting question. Richard asked, dad, what if your grandmother kept telling you to stay away from the carnival circus and the ringmaster and you hung out with the baseball players instead, had you done that, would anything have turned out differently. Jayson thought about it, then answered, I would have been an even better player than I was. 



Matthew Phillips and Paul Williamson wouldn’t have had been lectured by Mr. Boney Fingers, and we would have probably won the first 10 straight championship titles.


The ballroom erupted in an enthusiasticly long applause.


Jayson thanked everyone for coming and making his 65th birthday party a very meaningful event. 


Caitlyn then got up and she thanked everyone for being there and helping Jayson celebrate his 65th birthday.



(C)  2021

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Reviewed by Sandie May Joyce (Sandie Angel) 8/17/2021
Hi Stephen:

Another nice chapter. You have created many characters in this chapter and you put names to those characters.

May I suggest that when they spoke of their experiences with Jayson that you make it more personal? Putting their speech in first-person dialogues would make the person and the speech more memorable to the readers and allowing them to be connected with the speaker when the speaker shares his/her experience. Pay close attention to the speakers. If there is anyone whom you think will resurface later in your story then make an effort to introduce that person, his background, so your readers will be familiar with the character when he/she resurface later in the story.

Oh, above is only my opinion. I share what I know which I think may work better, but you are the one who will decide to take it or leave it. After all, as I kept repeating myself many times before - I'm not a professional editor, so I'm not forcing my opinion on you. I have to be so careful not to step on someone's toes who has nothing to offer to you other than to trash me and my opinion, and calling me a bully for putting my "words" on your work.

Oh, that is upsetting! I didn't expect that at all. As authors, we exchange knowledge and share ideas. That's all my opinion was and that's all it will ever be!

Sandie

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