Five – Choice

Shimmer - Enna

“None of this is real, you said so yourself.” Enna mused once she had circled the Vicar tree to inspect the vine.

“Did I?”  The Foxen had seated himself on the edge of a broken statue.  He now appeared to have a second set of legs; these ones smooth carved stone and quite feminine.

“Yes you did. In that other place, before we came through the arch,” Enna answered. “You also said we should have known what that place was.”

“Perhaps I spoke hastily,” the Foxen answered. “I forget that it is not always so easy for mortals to know their own souls.”

“Implying that you know all the depths of your own soul?” Enna asked.

“I have lived with it for far too long to not understand it,” the Foxen answered.

“The Foxen,” Enna tasted the words. “You had a name once did you not? Though, you gave it up when you became one of the Pi’can.”

The Foxen snorted laughter. “Pi’can! I always loved that little word the old ones had for us.  ‘The lost’.  We aren’t lost. We chose this.”

“But Svanir is still your mother, as she is mine and all the rest of the life here on this planet,” Enna said.

“Every child has to rebel against his mother, against all of his elders.  Rebellion is most especially required when a child is forced to live his life as a half-beast.  Perhaps we should ask dear Svanir why I was made this way, rebellious spirit and teeth and claws of a monster.  What did she really expect me to become?”

Enna was not really listening to the words the Foxen was speaking; her ear was perked more a particular tone.  The drop in the pitch of voice as the mind turned from present to past, from important circumstances of now, to the aches and follies the soul refuses to release.  When working with Eillim it was her job to hear that tone, Eillim’s to listen to the words themselves.  The citizens of Siol never really realized how they were being tag-teamed into giving their truthful answers.

When Enna heard that tone she knew which question to ask next, the question that would be the first crack in the dam of untruth.  Their unique gifts allowed them to see all answers from every point of view.  Enna now had to pay extra close attention as she concentrated on the Foxen, guiding him gently in the direction she wanted, alone.

“If I know the history of your birth, then you must as well.”

“Aye,” the Foxen agreed and fell silent.

Enna gave him the span of three breaths before she spoke the important question. “The root is Eillim’s connection to this place as well as yours?”

“She is the one who planted us both here,” the Foxen answered.

Enna smiled, exactly what she’d thought. “Then I will not remove it.”

“You will!” the Foxen roared.  The earth shook in an aftershock, or perhaps another collapsing piece of ancient bridge.  He surged to his feet; a blur of motion brought him to the edge of the Vicar garden where Enna stood.  He’d grown larger, hotter.  The playful animal had faded from his expression.

“If the vine is still alive, then so is Eillim.  This place isn’t Marbeth temple.  You said yourself that it is my soul.  I will not remove Eillim’s influence on me.”

“I don’t care about your sister” the Foxen loomed over her. “You should follow my example.  You should pay her no more heed, for she has already given you up.”

Enna stared at the Foxen in confusion.  “What do you mean?”

Shift - Eillim

Eillim came to a conclusion as she stared at the shifting Svanir.  There was something shifty and undefined not just in her form, but also in the aura surrounding the Mother of the Gods.  Eillim didn’t always need the questions Enna asked to understand the truth behind the motives of Siol’s citizen.  Much of what she read in them was in their auras alone.  The way it would flicker or fade, of suffuse suddenly with another shade, as if in a blush.

Eillim let her gaze wander away over the greenery that she had found so disgusting a few moments before.  She breathed in deeply.  It smelled of Enna, one of the deepest loves she would ever know.  But it also made her think of her mother.  That love was the resonance of Eillim’s very soul.  Her mother Kirisol, the Cheysa, the northerner, the enemy.

The Ariv’ta blood of the absent Ko’yet had overwhelmed her in this desert place, but Eillim suddenly recalled that it was not all she was made of.  This place was the true st part of her, the combination of two worlds and two magics.  Enna’s influence lingered here, yes, but so did her mother’s.  To eradicate either would be to destroy both.  Ultimately she would destroy herself.

Eillim was the link that allowed the twins to blend their powers the way it could never be done by any other.  Svanir and the Foxen were not trapped.  It would prove to be an impressive demonstration of a mortal’s power over the gods were it true .  But it wasn’t true .  Eillim and Enna together were not nearly that powerful, but obviously the gods thought there was a possibility they could become so.

That was unless she separated herself from her Cheysa ties. The Foxen and Svanir knew that.  They had brought the girls to this place only to separate them.

“You aren’t trapped here,” Eillim spoke finally to Svanir. “This, everything around us, is my mother’s magic in my soul, just as strong as my father’s. This is Enna’s influence on me.  I must tell you that I love it, just as part of me loves you. I won’t destroy what link I have with that.”

“You will do what I say, Savage,” Svanir’s voice filled the area with a deeper, freezing chill.

“You have no control of me, not here.  You can’t separate us on your own, you can’t even kill one of us to break the bond, or you would have certainly killed Enna.  But you haven’t”

“Do as I say,” Svanir raged.

“No.”

“You have such fondness for her, but perhaps you are the only one.  Perhaps your relationship is more and one sided than you imagine,” Svanir said.

“What do you mean?” Eillim asked

Svanir pointed at the arch on the wall behind Eillim, suddenly grown richly detailed and carved, a shimmering image stretching between the sloping stone.  Eillim turned and saw an image of a green plain, a gorge with a raging river and a great gray shape she knew to be Marbeth Temple.  She saw Enna and herself, hand in hand, and behind them trailed the Foxen.

“What…?” Eillim breathed.

Shift - Enna

“Look,” the Foxen aimed a claw at the arch on the opposite wall.  She followed his finger to the image flickering there.

Enna saw an expanse of desert with two figures crossing it.  She and Eillim approached a treacherous looking staircase carved into a cliffs lead downward into an oasis.  A shimmer to their side betrayed Svanir.

“What is that?” Enna demanded.

“Your sister let you fall,” the Foxen snarled

Shift - Eillim

Svanir’s voice was a whisper. “Your sister let you fall.”

Shimmer – Enna & Eillim

Enna watched herself attempt a crumbling leap and miss her sister’s outstretched arms by mere inches.  She saw the fracture under Eillim’s stair and her heart rejoiced when the dark twin saved herself and the imposter fell to her death.

Eillim already understood what they were attempting as she watched the bridge began to fall.  The fraud’s grip was smashed away by a falling arch and Enna moved to save herself.  This only confirmed what she knew.  Eillim watched it with dark, expressionless eyes.

The image within the archways grew dim, disappeared.  The girls face each other across the empty space.  Neither of them reacted.  Both deities read the lack of joy for the presence of anger and a lust for vengeance instead.  They were correct, for both of the girls were angry, but the gods did not presume the correct target.  Enna and Eillim were not stupid enough to fall for such an easy trap.  They reunited in silence, but it did not mean there was no communication in their gaze.

A crack of thunder shook the air around each girl’s holy place.  The bright flash of white blinded out everything.  Once again they found themselves within the turret ruin, a freestanding arch between them.  Svanir and the Foxen still lingered close, company to the wrong girl.

“The link will be broken,” the Foxen said, stalking toward Eillim, forgetting Enna altogether.

“We won’t do it,” Eillim answered.

“It has already begun,” Svanir said. “You made your decisions.  All of what we asked of you.  The root…”

“The vine,” the Foxen continued. “The intrusion of your holy places and the challenge to uproot each other was just a mirage.”

“Only a ploy to keep you distracted while your separation was completed.” Svanir finished.

“I don’t recall making any choice,” Enna said.

“You don’t, little Preyling?” The Foxen grinned.

“You chose life,” Svanir swirled close to Enna.

“And you chose death,” The Foxen nodded to Eillim.

The girls shared a confused look but said nothing.

“Life for yourself,” Svanir answered their unspoken question.

“And death for your sister,” continued the Foxen. “Those were your choices.”

“I don’t think I perceive the difference between those two things.” Eillim said.

“And of course you would be the one to make that distinction,” Svanir snarled. “The savage accused of death.”

“You can’t trick us into hating each other,” Enna shouted at Svanir. “You will not split us apart.”

Enna stepped toward the arch her eyes on Eillim.  This time did not pass under the carved stone but fell back with a cry.  A wall of flame combusted from the very air and separated them, racing past the archway to divide the entire room in half.  Eillim watched her sister over the dancing flames.

Svanir spoke.  “It is not your choice any longer.  When it is complete, when you two are separate, you will both feel very differently.  You won’t be able to stand the sight of one another.  This is your punishment for tampering with things larger and more powerful than you.  After this you will belong to us.”

“You will be our servants.  The world has forgotten the old gods and it is time that they are reminded of where they really come from.” the Foxen finished.

“The world belongs to different gods now, and we belong to ourselves.” Enna said.

“Not anymore,” The Foxen’s hand flashed toward his whip.

Shift - Eillim

Eillim watched the Foxen and Svanir.  She listened to the words they said and the ones they didn’t.  She could feel Enna growing dimmer, as if there were strand of thread running between them and it was now burning through.

Eillim threw one arm up to protect against the deadly whip as the Foxen drew.  The thick cord snapped around her wrist, scorching the skin in black ropes and leaving an imprint of the woven flat in a black burn on her hand.  The Foxen yanked her forward.  Distantly she heard Enna’s scream.  She had to ignore it, the Foxen towered over her.

“You belong to me now,” the Foxen snarled.

“I don’t,” Eillim insisted.

“Your sister won’t have you now that I have marked you.  And that world you hide in will not have you without her,” The Foxen’s voice smoothed over Eillim, exciting the part of her that drowned in Ariv’ta blood.  “I will have you,” he crooned.  “Come to the desert and reawaken your true desert cravings.”

“No,” Eillim shook her head, wrenching against his grip.

“You’ll kill her if you try to stay with her,” the Foxen told her. “I am in your blood and I will drive you to kill her.”

“It will never happen,” Eillim shook her head.

“Don’t make promises you can’t keep, my little love.” the Foxen grinned. “Make promises to me instead.  Come with me and be my queen. We’ll hunt together every night.  We will reawaken the magic in the blood of the forgotten tribes and rule all of the lands.”

Eillim was not frightened.  She felt awe and respect and a deep lust that rejoiced at the offer of his companionship, and viciousness that leapt for the promised kill.  But she was two parts, and she was balanced.  She was sure, “I won’t leave Enna.”

“Stubborn, I understand,” the Foxen laughed.  Eillim’s vision began to darken, the edges of the room fading into black.  Even the Foxen’s voice sounded hollow and distant. “You won’t leave her until you kill her.  That alone is sure to drive you insane.  Then you will come to me, and then you will be my bride.  I have always hoped for a wife that had gone quite mad.”

The last Eillim heard was his fading chuckle.

Shift - Enna

Enna saw the Foxen’s whip snap around Eillim’s wrist and she started toward them, no longer caring about the flames.  She saw Svanir’s movement from the corner of her eye.  The Mother of the Gods used her long tail as a whip exactly as her lost son had.  The three pronged end of Svanir’s tail wrapped over Enna’s shoulder, scorching the pale skin over her shoulder and her chest.  The force of the snap spun her around.  She screeched in pain and fell to her knees.

“You chose life,” Svanir reminded her. “Those savages over there are death, and our opposite.  Our equal, but our opposite.  You cannot exist in the same place.  You belong to me now.”

“No,” Enna shook her head and Svanir floated closer.

“You will destroy her if you stay with her.  To be taken from her is your punishment for your presumptions.  But you have now a life in service to what you had sworn yourself anyway.  If you love her, you must leave her.”

“I will not leave her,” Enna said. “I cannot survive without her.”

Svanir swirled, her form dissipating “Then destroy her, I care not,” the walls of the turret the blue sky overhead grew dark and thin. “You’ll come to me when she is ashes.  You will be my servant for eternity,”

Enna tried to deny it again, but only a sigh passed her lips.

Pause

Enna and Eillim opened their eyes and stared at each other across the salt and chalk line in the circle of their shared holy ground.  It didn’t feel sacred any longer, just charged with the sparklers of opposing energies.  Both girls wanted to run from the other, but they sat still instead, staring at each other and trying to make sense of what had happened.

Enna finally moved.  She leaned forward and swept the line of salt and chalk away with a scoop of her palm, flinging grit across the floor and toppling a candlestick.  Neither of them moved to right it as Enna grabbed Eillim’s hand and pushed back the long sleeve to reveal her wrist.  A line of black wound twice around the narrow bones and the mark ended in a webbed leaf shape on the back of her hand.  The entire mark was perfectly black and smooth, like a tattoo.

The girls stared at the mark, unheeding of the fact that Enna’s fingers had begun to scorch Eillim’s skin.  As their eyes met Eillim saw the dark mark under the sheaf of Enna’s blonde hair.  She pushed the hair off Enna’s shoulder with her free hand and pulled the collar of the shirt aside to reveal a three pronged mark stamped there.  Like Eillim’s mark, Enna’s bore a connecting whip lash mark that would forever remind them of where and how they’d been marked. Eillim’s fingers on Enna’s shoulder were burning the pale skin.

“What have we done?” Enna gasped.

“We made our choices,” Eillim answered and let go of her sister.  Enna released Eillim and they both sat back.  They bore oval finger-shaped burn marks that would heal into small shiny spots; another reminder, this one of the last time they would touch.

“But we chose the same thing,” Enna said.

“I know that,” Eillim nodded. “They know it as well.”

The overturned candle dripped wax and fire leapt to a new height as it found a new fuel.  Enna reached for a tall silver chalice filled with water.  She lifted it by its sturdy base and turned to dash it over the fire.

“No!” Eillim exclaimed.  She stopped the motion of the cup high up, away from Enna’s fingers.  The water sloshed over her hand, stinging her fingers.  It was life water, drawn from the volcanic crater.

Eillim took the cup from Enna and put it down.  She lifted a bowl still filled with flower petals and now sprinkled in a layer of chalk and salt.  The flower petals had been fresh at the beginning of the cast, but now were shriveled and dried.  Eillim dumped the mess to the floor and tipped the dish over the fire to suffocate it.

“She told me I would destroy you,” Enna said.

“He told me the same thing,” Eillim agreed. “But I don’t necessarily believe what he says; what either of them says.  They think we are far dumber than we truly are.”

“What are we going to do?” Enna asked.

“We have two options, I suppose.  Do what they say, be their servants and separate from each other, or don’t.  Go on with our lives as we were,” Eillim answered. She pinched out the flames of other candles, hardly burned more than a quarter hour.

“Just, don’t?” Enna asked in a breathless voice. Eillim looked up and saw her paling expression, but could not reach for her. “How can we stay together if our touch harms one another?”

“We make do.  We belong together, forever, in this house where all of our ancestors have made their lives.  The Foxen and Svanir have marked us and we both know what it means.  We are forever in their service, but they cannot force us apart.  If they could separate us without our consent they would have.  We cannot blend our magic any longer, but we are still more powerful as a pair than the two of them separated as they are.”

“They are not so separate in this, questing toward the same goal.”

“For different reasons,” Eillim said.  She stood and dusted her clothing off. “They are at war with each other as well as us and they waste energy on their thousand year feud.  If they should ever put aside their hatred for each other to unite against us, perhaps then we shall fear.”

Enna rose.  She looked at the mess around them and stepped out of the circle that meant nothing to them now. “Neither of them is right.”

“Yes,” Eillim agreed. “But also, neither of them is wrong.”

“You would be the one to bring up that point,” Enna sighed.  Eillim smiled at her sister, her best friend.  Enna returned the grin.

Break

I want to say a very special thanks to everyone who stuck through the story to the end.  Also to Anne Cunningham (poet on this site) who is not only the heart and soul of Enna (as I am of Eillim) but who also gave me a version of this title that inspired the whole story.  And to my dad who taught me to read and has been waiting patiently for me to finish writing something he can read and have it actually be done when I'm finished (and for not killing me for using 'finish' now three times in one sentence!).

This is not the end of Eillim and Enna's story, but that's in the future.  For more information on my grand scheme of my fantasy universe click on the link below.