Until you been beside a man you don’t know how he feels.
a man’s feelings
A
n old Bob Seger song goes: “Until you’ve been beside a man, you don’t know how he feels.”
Isn’t that true ? I remember one time talking with a woman, unaware of my feelings, when she said, “I can just tell how you feel by the look on your face.”
“That’s amazing; I wasn’t even aware how I feel.” The conversation about my feelings ended.
We are all guilty of this. We often assume how someone is feeling, or what he or she is thinking, when in actuality, we don’t know. I suppose that is human nature,
but it’s based upon a false premise. It is ridiculous to believe one can actually know how another person feels.
It is true ; women are more in touch with their feelings than men are. They confide in each other while men often do not. But that doesn’t mean a woman is more in touch with a man’s feelings. Their mothering nature yearns to calm us down and make everything okay. Women are correct in their application of talking about their feelings and sharing problems with each other.
Men say things like: “Suck it up, walk it off, buck up, deal with it, or the old standard: take it like a man.” My personal favorite is “Get over it!” Ironically, eventually that is what we may need to do. Those old sayings are tired and worn out. Guys, accept your emotions, and learn to process them. It’s okay to talk to others about your feelings.
Being a man doesn’t come with an instruction booklet. The women I have known understand I am a deep-feeling and sensitive person. I acquired that trait from my father and it is something I am proud of. My father’s character was revealed when we lived in the Greenwood area of Seattle.
So many people try to "assume" what the other person is feeling. Sometimes we try to look at a person's facial expressions to figure out what he or she is feeling rather than asking a direct question.
The funniest thing is that women tend to analyze men and they ask their friends things like : what do you think he meant by that? or do you think he is dating someone else besides me? Men play the guessing games, too. I enjoyed reading your work today because it reminds me of how complicated relationships can become when we try to "guess". Sometimes, men and women make things more complicated because they assume what the other person is feeling rather than communicating directly with the person. This is a great write!
At first I thought that men couldn't really relate to their feelings like women, because they were not endowed with the same capacities.
However, after an email session with the Author, Michael Eads, and reading the additional information on his website: bookondivorce and hearing his audio message, My opinion has changed.
I believe he has been able to come to grips with his reality after divorce and that the advice he offers, is from treading on the solid and stable ground of experience, having traversed it successfully to his ultimate destination, closure.
This man is for real, and I can only hope his message gets into the hands of those men who really could benefit from his life's journey and hard learned lessons.
“Being a couple yet free is our next challenge on the evolutionary ladder. This book successfully helps us unravel the myths that block that achievement. It does it with warmth, with readability, and with balance. It recreates everyday problems and
