Temperature, oil, gas, engine gauges in a car are indicators if a car requires some attention.

Similarly for humans, emotions give clues about the mental and emotional state of a person.

It is not practical or wise to say I do not want to look at gauges in my car, they are too depressing or negative!

Similarly we cannot ignore our emotions and not expect any consequences later.

All of our emotions need to be acknowledged, processed and let go.

One of the emotions that we can learn from, is regret.

Dealing with regret in a constructive way, helps us realize what is meaningful to us which can give us more meaning to our lives.

Daniel Pink, author and researcher in human behavior has done research on regret. His indicates four general categories for feeling of regret:

• Boldness regret:         for not taking chances (i.e., joining a startup)
• Foundation regret:    for not doing the work (i.e., continued my education or taking care of my health)
• Moral regret:              for doing the right thing (i.e., spoken up for injustice)
• Connection regret:     for not making the connection (i.e., becoming  more vulnerable by connecting deeper)

If a person has no regret, either he/she has processed the emotion or is not aware of it at a conscious level or he/she is in a total denial.

Keep in mind that we typically do not have regrets about saying, “I love you” to our loved ones or have regrets about working on something that scared us or was not easy for us.

Most regrets are about ‘not doing’, rather than ‘doing’ something.

Most regrets are about living safe and fearful half-lives.

We need to take time and explore if we have any regrets regarding our career choices, spirituality, health, finance and/or relationships.

Our exploration is not about holding on to such regrets as a punishment for ourselves.

Rather it can be used to reflect deeply on what is important to us now and how we can better experience those important aspects in our lives.

Copyright .2022 by Shervin Hojat