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Shervin Hojat, Ph.D.

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When Kindness is Very Unkind
by Shervin Hojat, Ph.D.   
Rated "G" by the Author.
     
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Extreme kindness which stunts the growth of an individual, is not kindness

We all are here to learn our lessons and most of the time the learning is through some kind of emotional and/or physical pain.

When a toddler starts walking, he/she at first will fall down, feel scared and even may get bruised.

Imagine, if we carry the toddler on our shoulder and not allow her/him to learn to walk and fall down because we cannot stand them being upset or see them bruised and crying.

Our ‘kindness’ which in reality is selfishness will not help in the growth and independence of that toddler.

We learn lessons and grow not only as toddlers but also as adults. As adults, we will fall down and get bruised up in a different way.

If we out of kindness do not allow our friends or family to learn their lessons and bail them out emotionally or financially, we not only have not been kind to them, but also have harmed them.  

Extreme kindness which stunts the growth of an individual, is not kindness, it is an act of ignorance and selfishness to feel good at the expense of others who we claim we care for.

What aspect of your life are you too kind, stunning the growth of others and what aspect of your life do you need to be kinder to help with the growth of others?

 

Copyright .2022 by Shervin Hojat

Web Site: www.shervinhojat.com


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Reviewed by Ronald Hull
Reviewed on August 30, 2022
I really agree with your article. I'm forever grateful for my young parents allowing me and my brother to get into all kinds of scrapes that had us able to leave home at 18 on our own without ever having to rely on mom and dad anymore.

People these days, view the news wrong and tend to try to be overprotective… helicopter parents. Creating an unhealthy, codependent lifestyle that doesn't bode well for their initiative and fair play. Just letting toddlers play in the mud or in fallow fields, observing insects up close and smelling wildflowers, will greatly improve their immune systems in the future, having fewer allergies. When I last tested, I have no allergies to the usual suspects and probably can still pick poison ivy without any reaction like I did in my youth.

Rod

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