Abuse leaves a mark on people that many cannot understand

Someone ran away with her innocence.

From the first time I heard the song “Holy Water” by country powerhouse group “Big & Rich” it reached out and grabbed me by the heart. I listen to a lot of music; it’s my companion as I go through the day. Seldom does a song catch my attention like this one.

In the song there is a line that states “Someone ran away with her innocence..”. To me, this is a very profound way to describe what an abuse victim goes through. No matter what form of abuse, innocence and self worth is stripped from it’s victim and even if you survive it never leaves you. Even ten year later I still carry the scars.

Somewhere there’s a stolen halo, I use to watch her wear it well

Abuse in any degree takes the radiance from a person’s world. The outcome of which leaves a dull, lifeless world that at times makes the person feel as though life is not even worth living.

I can only imagine what she’s feeling as she praying, kneeling at the edge of her bed

If you have never been in an abusive relationship, a person can’t understand the effect it has on it’s victims. Calling someone a survivor is not to be taken lightly. People are affected and cope in different ways but you never overcome an abusive past.

Some work through their issues and learn to deal with the things from their past.

Others try to pretend they aren’t affected.

I’m a little of both. I don’t try to work through my issues but I don’t deny they aren’t there. It’s hard to ignore some of my “quirks” as I like to call them. Far too often they invade and interrupt my daily life.

She wants someone to call her Angel, someone to put the light back in her eye.

In it’s wake, abuse leave a person seeking to fill a void. For me it meant I have spent my whole life seeking someone to love me, just as I am, to accept the person I am and to tell me I am enough.

When you spend your whole like not making the grade, having everything you do getting shot down and deemed worthless it’s hard to force yourself out of that mold and to see yourself as a worthwhile human being.

She needs someone to hear her when she cries, just needs a little help to wash away the pain she’s felt

Abuse is probably one of the most isolating thing that can happen to a person. It’s hard to find people who understand and are willing to accept the challenge of dealing with a person with a complicated past. Many think they are up to the task but soon find themselves in over their heads.

She says “Take me away, then take me farther. Surround me now and hold me like holy water.”

 

There are so many times I would like to be taken away from the hurt and suffering of my past but I know there is no way to escape it. I have to do the best I can with what I have been given.